Should I go again?

squishykins

Hi guys, just looking for a little advice.

Just before my Leaving Cert I went to the GP because I was struggling, I spent most of that year in tears and not really caring about life. I explained all I could to her, albeit not very well as I'm not great with words, and she just put it on stress and out the door I went. I've been terrified to go back since. I've been back for other things, but never that again, and she never asked me again. That was 2 years ago.

I'm living in Maynooth now and things have just been getting worse. I haven't really noticed it myself, but my boyfriend of 4 years said to me yesterday that I have to get help, he's seen me deteriorate over the course of that time. I went to the on-campus counsellor once, and hated it with a passion, never going back. Also the waiting lists for it are crazy, there'd be no point anyway.

I can't afford to pay for another counsellor so my only option is to go to the doctor again (a different one obviously) and hope she believes me this time. I don't think I can face being thrown out the door again. How can I make her see that I need help?

Thanks for reading

Hersheys

Is there a GP on campus?

Could you request a different counsellor? Different strokes for different folks and all that. I saw 2 counsellors before I found "one that fit" if that makes sense. We don't always find it easy to open up to strangers - maybe a different person might help? As a general rule, are you more comfortable talking to guys or girls (with friends etc), as I found it easier to see a female counsellor.

Are there any changes you could make in your life to eliminate the stress at all? Whats your trigger, college work? Family issues? Boyfriend trouble? If it's college related, talk to your tutor - they'll be able to advise you on what you can do and what options/resources are available to you regarding stress-related troubles that have an impact on your ability to do work.

And yes, I think it would be beneficial to go back to a GP. Ask for a longer appointment - again, it's not so easy to open up easily so both you and the GP will appreciate having the extra few minutes to discuss things. Don't expect a prescription straight away - it might take an appointment or two to get to the root of your problem.

Good luck.

MS.ing

go. back. to. your. GP
tell them how you feel and be BRUTALLY honest, good luck

dudara

You are attending Maynooth University, I'm guessing.

Universities tend to have good health & mental services, so it's worth trying them. If you're not happy with the GP or counsellor you see, ask for another appointment with a different one.

Check out the university's health services on their website and see what's on offer. Also, you might like a chat with an organisation with the Samaritans - it might start to help in getting some stuff off your chest.

squishykins

Hersheys wrote: »

Is there a GP on campus?

Could you request a different counsellor? Different strokes for different folks and all that. I saw 2 counsellors before I found "one that fit" if that makes sense. We don't always find it easy to open up to strangers - maybe a different person might help? As a general rule, are you more comfortable talking to guys or girls (with friends etc), as I found it easier to see a female counsellor.

Are there any changes you could make in your life to eliminate the stress at all? Whats your trigger, college work? Family issues? Boyfriend trouble? If it's college related, talk to your tutor - they'll be able to advise you on what you can do and what options/resources are available to you regarding stress-related troubles that have an impact on your ability to do work.

And yes, I think it would be beneficial to go back to a GP. Ask for a longer appointment - again, it's not so easy to open up easily so both you and the GP will appreciate having the extra few minutes to discuss things. Don't expect a prescription straight away - it might take an appointment or two to get to the root of your problem.

Good luck.

There is a GP but I can't go to them because I've a medical card. Like I said the waiting lists for the on-campus counsellors are crazy, I went once, was given a 15 minute session and told the earliest I could come back was 3 weeks from then, and in the meantime I bottled it. If I don't sort my problem quickly I just can't talk about it any more, I don't know why. Even waiting Saturday to Monday for the doctor's to open changes everything =/ I don't expect a prescription, I want to be referred to someone I can go to more often, but who I can get through the medical card, I can't afford it any other way.

It's sort of college related in the fact that I don't want to be there, I just want to settle down and have a family, I have no desire to have a job or anything but the times require it. Mostly financial problems I'd say, but there's more that I'd rather not say here.

I just don't see a way out tbh, I feel trapped in my own life and I increasingly feel like I don't wanna be here any more

Zen65

squishykins wrote: »

How can I make her see that I need help?

Take time to prepare for the next time you visit.

You can't waltz in and sit there trying to explain yourself, because in that stressful situation the words won't come. So, spend an hour some evening writing down the things you'd like to say. Read them a few times and be sure that you have captured your thoughts and feelings in a way she'll understand.

Maybe even use this thread to practise what you'd write (without revealing anything that would identify you or others)?

Do it soon, make the appointment with your GP, and start to feel better. Bring the letter you wrote into the doctor's office. Remember, doctors don't want to rush you through, they want to do the best they can for you, but they need your help to know what the best course of action is.

squishykins wrote: »

I don't want to be there, I just want to settle down and have a family

Everyone is entitled to their own desires, even if they cannot be realised immediately. At such a young age you should be careful about rushing to "settle down" because it can be an early gateway to long-term unhappiness (this coming from a man married shortly after college, now married almost 25 years and very happy with life).


Be at peace,

Z

squishykins

Zen65 wrote: »

Take time to prepare for the next time you visit.

You can't waltz in and sit there trying to explain yourself, because in that stressful situation the words won't come. So, spend an hour some evening writing down the things you'd like to say. Read them a few times and be sure that you have captured your thoughts and feelings in a way she'll understand.

Maybe even use this thread to practise what you'd write (without revealing anything that would identify you or others)?

Do it soon, make the appointment with your GP, and start to feel better. Bring the letter you wrote into the doctor's office. Remember, doctors don't want to rush you through, they want to do the best they can for you, but they need your help to know what the best course of action is.



Everyone is entitled to their own desires, even if they cannot be realised immediately. At such a young age you should be careful about rushing to "settle down" because it can be an early gateway to long-term unhappiness (this coming from a man married shortly after college, now married almost 25 years and very happy with life).


Be at peace,

Z

Yeah I think I'll do that with the letter, it should make things easier.

Yeah I'm starting to realise that, it was actually pointed out to me last night that I always sort of look forward to the next part of my life and don't focus on what I have now. Like I was so looking forward to college and couldn't stand being stuck in school, now I'm stuck in college etc. I dunno, I just was never very good at anything, I'm average at most but never outstanding in one particular thing, except looking after children and basically all the typical housewife-y stuff :P I've never intended to rush into it though.