Putting a limit on presents.

cofy

Hi All,

I have a question. My daughters birthday is during the Christmas rush. I have already asked parents of the children invited not to spend any more than 5 euros on a present. (she loves colouring, hair accessories) I was completely ignored.

My little girl is so spoiled by her us, her uncle and aunts it is unreal. The main reason for a party is to get her friends together with her. I get so annoyed by seeing presents that parents paid for presents being so disregarded.

My question to you is - how can I make myself heard and at the same time show respect to other parents?

Sleepy

One of my step-son's friends had a birthday party recently where they asked for a contribution of €5 towards a lego set rather than a present.

While, on the surface it may seem a little vulgar to ask for money, I thought it was a nice way of keeping the price of gifts limited and ensuring one present which would mean something to the birthday boy rather than a lot of random presents which may only get played with once...

cofy

Sleepy wrote: »

One of my step-son's friends had a birthday party recently where they asked for a contribution of €5 towards a lego set rather than a present.

While, on the surface it may seem a little vulgar to ask for money, I thought it was a nice way of keeping the price of gifts limited and ensuring one present which would mean something to the birthday boy rather than a lot of random presents which may only get played with once...

Your idea is fantistic, I will take that on board when sending out invitations.

For any one else reading this thread. I understand that people may feel it vulgar but that's exactily how I felt when handing invitations out to parents, but spending money un-neccessarily Christmas time, means that some parents may not let their children go to the party, while I understand that, even though this is exactly my reason for the 5 euro limit, I don't want for my little girl's friends to miss out on a party.

Big Bag of Chips

You could invite people over to play without telling them it's a party. A friend of mine did this, invited everyone individually, and nobody knew it was a party until they showed up.

I think, realistically, you can't stop people buying presents. So even though people might give the fiver, they may also feel like the should buy something so she has something to unwrap.

Moonbeam

My girls are only small but we have the birthdays around christmas issue too.
At the moment family and good friends ask what to get them so I tell them. I get her something small to open or last year I think it was feb before she got her birthday present which was only her birthday present because we could not fit it in the car!
Don't fret about it too much,you can put toys away or re-give them;)

silja

Ask for contributions to a children's charity instead of a gift?

cynder

Think you can hold an ice cream party and funds (gifts of money) go to down syndrome, diabetes or cf. Something like that anyway.


http://www.downsyndrome.ie/index.php/hb-ice-cream-sundays


My fella will be 5 on the 29th of dec so not sure what were going to do regarding a party

cofy

grindelwald wrote: »

Think you can hold an ice cream party and funds (gifts of money) go to down syndrome, diabetes or cf. Something like that anyway.


http://www.downsyndrome.ie/index.php/hb-ice-cream-sundays


My fella will be 5 on the 29th of dec so not sure what were going to do regarding a party

I normally take the parties to a childrens play centre. I have found this to be most convenient all round. It's close to where parents can go and do secret Christmas shopping, there are so many activities for the children, the staff also get involved organising games etc., and all the food is provided.

ash23

My little one got an invite to a party where the invitation said "your presence is the only gift required".

Alternatively, you could accept the gifts and give them, unopened to a charity such as the St vincent de Paul.
Or ask each child to bring a shoebox gift box and then give them to the shoebox appeal before christmas.
http://www.cradle.ie/fundraising/christmas-shoebox-appeal

Wantobe

ash23 wrote: »

My little one got an invite to a party where the invitation said "your presence is the only gift required".

I did that too, and every one still brought presents.

Then another year I decided not to have birthday parties but instead one halloween party. People still brought presents.

I would love to ask for a donation to charity but I think it's wrong to dictate to other people what to do- just a personal feeling, so instead grin and bear it and try to remember that other people WANT to bring a gift and my children certainly love to get them!:rolleyes:

But we've had christmases where we've hidden gifts that came in the post because the children received far too much and we've given them to charity shops. And we have asked the family not to send presents but they just insist. Our play room has more toys than I know what to do with and that is despite regularly giving away to charity and on jumbletown.ie

We donate monthly to Plan and have sponsored a child in South America and this is one way that we explain to our children that they are really lucky and others are not so fortunate. Little by little they understand.

LegacyUser

I'm not a parent but I know that one of my friends operates a one-in-one-out system with regards to presents so that every time her children get a toy they have to donate one to a charity etc. She has been doing this since her children were tiny so it works perfectly but if you were to suddenly introduce this I think your daughter might see it as some sort of strange punishment.

A family I used to work with solved the problem by having the children make the presents for their friends (a drawing, pasta "jewellery", buns etc) and soon enough they started gettign the same sort of things in return... although now they have to find room for all the artworks they receive.

My unlce simply explained the situation in a letter addressed to "Parents" attached to the invite. He said most people took it well. Some thought they were being rude or pretentious or even selfish but that's just people I guess.

LegacyUser

They were talking about this on Newstalk recently. Some schools put a €5 cash limit to be put towards a bigger present through the parents' board and every child went home with a letter asking them to implement it. Other schools had a brave parent or two who stood at the school gates doing the same thing. I think that some had €5 sticker or symbol on the invitation to indiate the policy.

cofy

Thanks every one you have given me some really great ideas. Your suggestions are very much appreciated. You have also helped me come up with another possibility. While putting a 5 euro limit on the invitations I could also keep a closer eye on what she plays with ask her if she would like bring some to the paediatric ward of our local hospital. Being born premature she had a lot of check up's and remembers a lot about toys she was able to play with in the waiting room.

Once again thanks everyone.