Dating advise please!

Longford Lass

Hi guys!
Looking for some advise please.
Had a coffee date today. Nice guy, good conversationalist etc.
However...theres 1 thing thats unsettling me and I'm not sure what to do.
This guy is a smoker...and this is pretty obvious in that his teeth are in quite a bad state.
My question to you is what would you do in the same situation??
Go with the flow and see what might develop bearing in mind that this is something that could be worked on/fixed or would it totally put you off meeting up again??
I hope I'm not sounding too fickle here...

I am a friend

Did you fancy him? Personally, poor hygiene of any type would turn me off.

Longford Lass

I am a friend wrote: »

Did you fancy him? Personally, poor hygiene of any type would turn me off.

Bad teeth aside he is an attractive guy...though that probably sounds like an oxymoron!

A0

Smoking is a turn off for me... but then it's just me (don't like the smell of it and the fact that it's unhealthy). And I like nice teeth :-)Are you a smoker? If not, it might be difficult on the long term. It might be ok-ish at the beginning but then it'll be hard for you if you don't like the smell of smoke (kissing, being close to him, etc.).

Longford Lass

A0 wrote: »

Smoking is a turn off for me... but then it's just me (don't like the smell of it and the fact that it's unhealthy). And I like nice teeth :-)Are you a smoker? If not, it might be difficult on the long term. It might be ok-ish at the beginning but then it'll be hard for you if you don't like the smell of smoke (kissing, being close to him, etc.).

I'm a non smoker myself and dont like it but I always said I'd never let that be a 'deal breaker' if I met a nice guy.
Its the 'being close to him/kissing etc that I currently have concerns about.
In fairness....I think that probably answers my own question doesnt it?!!

A0

Longford Lass wrote: »

I'm a non smoker myself and dont like it but I always said I'd never let that be a 'deal breaker' if I met a nice guy.
Its the 'being close to him/kissing etc that I currently have concerns about.
In fairness....I think that probably answers my own question doesnt it?!!

It's a bit of a dilemma here... on one hand you don't want this to be a "deal breaker" but, on the other you have concerns. My experience is that I'm very sporty, non-smoker and I get kind of sore throat if I am close to smokers for a while or if I am in a smoking environment (as Pubs/Bars/Clubs were before)...
To answer your question, it depends on you only, if you have no problem with the health side and if you can cope with the smell, kissing, etc. then go for it

LegacyUser

I'd be more worried about him having bad hygiene habits in general.
You say his teeth are in a bad state, in what way?
Just because someone smokes, that isn't an excuse to have disgusting teeth tbh. All the more reason to go to the dentist regularly. If they're just a little yellow, that's probably something you might be able to get over, but if they're rotting and black, and his breath constantly reeks then that's just awful oral hygiene and has more to do with him being lazy and just not into good personal hygiene than him being a smoker, and is not something you will ever be able to change if he's obviously ignoring the problem already.

Longford Lass

Knew I'd answered my own question before I'd even posed it!
Just seems a shame as I really enjoyed his company etc.
Such is life I guess...

WANTStoWORK

My God, you sound so shallow, I am just a bit curious as to why you needed a second opinion regarding this guy. So he smokes, big deal, how many bad habits do you have? For what it's worth I think this guy had a lucky escape.

I am a friend

WANTStoWORK wrote: »

My God, you sound so shallow, I am just a bit curious as to why you needed a second opinion regarding this guy. So he smokes, big deal, how many bad habits do you have? For what it's worth I think this guy had a lucky escape.

Rubbish - dental hygiene is not a 'nice to have', it's a basic

Neyite

WANTStoWORK wrote: »

My God, you sound so shallow, I am just a bit curious as to why you needed a second opinion regarding this guy. So he smokes, big deal, how many bad habits do you have? For what it's worth I think this guy had a lucky escape.

I dont think its shallow. You dont need expensive orthodtics, but clean teeth is really important. You get a free teeth clean annually on your PRSI so there is no excuse.

Someone with bad teeth have bad mouth hygiene and more than likely bad breath. They aint kissing me!

Distorted

I don't see whats shallow about it. What you find attractive or not is an individual thing. OP my initital thought was no way, then I thought what if he is truly exceptionally good looking, apart from the teeth? But even then, I don't think I could kiss someone with really bad teeth. For one thing, some mouth conditions are infectious. And then theres the smoking - like the poster above, I do sport competitively and being around smokers does affect my breathing, particularly since I've got exercise induced asthma. Plus, if his teeth are like that now, unless he spends a lot of money, possibly on implants, they are going to get worse and he will lose his teeth. When you lose teeth, your whole face can sink in and change shape drastically because you lose bone, its very ageing.

Longford Lass

WANTStoWORK wrote: »

My God, you sound so shallow, I am just a bit curious as to why you needed a second opinion regarding this guy. So he smokes, big deal, how many bad habits do you have? For what it's worth I think this guy had a lucky escape.

Ooops...looks like I've hit a nerve here!

Thanks to the rest of you folks for your contribution.

Ham Sambo

I find it rather amusing that you could not form your own opinion on this guy all by yourself. You either like smokers or you don't. Any dentist will tell you there is a lot of other factors that contribute to bad teeth apart from smoking.

What made you so unsure about this guy anyway?

Longford Lass

Ham Sambo wrote: »

I find it rather amusing that you could not form your own opinion on this guy all by yourself. You either like smokers or you don't. Any dentist will tell you there is a lot of other factors that contribute to bad teeth apart from smoking.

What made you so unsure about this guy anyway?

I'm glad you were amused by my post!!
Forgive me if I'm wrong..but I thought this was a public forum where you could come for advise, a chat, to share an opinion etc etc.
Instead it seems to be an avenue for some folk to 'have a go'.
Kinda pathetic IMO :rolleyes:

Taltos

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Taltos

Ham Sambo

Longford Lass wrote: »

I'm glad you were amused by my post!!
Forgive me if I'm wrong..but I thought this was a public forum where you could come for advise, a chat, to share an opinion etc etc.
Instead it seems to be an avenue for some folk to 'have a go'.
Kinda pathetic IMO :rolleyes:

Woops! hit a nerve I think :rolleyes:, It's doesen't really matter anyways, You are correct in what you say, it is a public forum for anybody to join in, having said that you really haven't answered my question as to why you could not decide if you like guys who smoke or not, by the way I am not 'having a go', I have a curious sort of a nature.