Television favorite quote

Yakuza

The Black Oil wrote: »

Wu!
Swedgin!

:pac:

Cock-sucka!

Jayne from Firefly has some of my favourite quotes ever:
"Do you know what the chain of command is here? It's the chain I go get and beat you with to show you who's in command."
"Ten percent of nuthin' is...let me do the math here...nuthin' into nuthin'...carry the nuthin'..."
"I'll kill a man in a fair fight. Or if I think he's gonna start a fair fight. Or if he bothers me. Or if there's a woman. Or if I'm gettin' paid. Mostly when I'm gettin' paid."

tvnutz

"You come at the king,you best not miss"-Omar Little. The Wire.

AnamGlas

"BUS ****" - the charming Jay, Inbetweeners.

Jesus Wept

orrado Erico 'Uncle Junior' Soprano: Tony, if you're gonna lie to me, tell me there's a broad in the car waiting to tongue my balls.
Anthony 'Tony' Soprano Sr.: Hey, You want that, it's a phone call away.

The King of Moo

tvnutz wrote: »

"You come at the king,you best not miss"-Omar Little. The Wire.

Damn straight .

This thread needs more Kenny Powers. I'll only post one quote as I'd end up posting all of his dialogue if I don't limit myself.

Kid in Gym Class: My dad said you ruined baseball.
Kenny Powers: You know what? I can already tell that I don’t like you. And I’m probably not going to like you no matter how many pull-ups or push-ups you do. If anybody wants to pick on anybody in class, aim for him, cause I ain’t watching.

Kenny Powers: Eastbound and Down.

RolandIRL

Futurama

Zapp Brannigan: Ah she's built like a steakhouse, but she handles like a bistro

Prof. Farnsworth (referring to Doomsday device): I suppose I could part with one and still be feared.

True Blood

Pam: Blah blah vampire emergency blah...

newbie2

(Petting Jeff's german shepherd:)
"Its nice to be affectionate to something german. You don't get the oppurtunity that often." CURB

"Fcuk me like you fcuked my country" CURB

dagdha

The IT Crowd

Jen: Mr Reynholm, I don't need to remind you of the report that denounced Reynholm Industries as an institutionally sexist organisation.

Douglas Reynholm: Now you hold on a minute sugar tits

RobertFoster

"Got your back, Jack. Bitches be crazy." - Sheldon (quoting someone else), The Big Bang Theory

"Every step a ****in' adventure." - Al Swearengen (watching Jewel climbing the stairs in the Gem), Deadwood.

Kiith

Some possible spoilers below...

Dennis - Always Sunny in Sunny in Philadelphia wrote:

I hate listening to people's dreams. It is like flipping through a stack of photographs. If I'm not in any of them and nobody is having sex, I just don't care.

Jack - Lost wrote:

You're not John Locke. You disrespect his memory by wearing his face, but you're nothing like him. Turns out he was right about most everything. Just wish I could have told him that while he was still alive.

Jack - 24 wrote:

I'm federal agent Jack Bauer. This is the longest day of my life."

Sookie / Erik - True Blood wrote:

Sookie: He's your maker isn't he?
Eric: Don't use words you don't understand.
Sookie: You have a lot of love for him.
Eric: Don't use words I don't understand.

The King of Moo wrote: »

The Great Saul Tigh:

"My name is Saul Tigh. I'm an officer in the Colonial Fleet. Whatever else I am, whatever else it means, that's the man I want to be. And if I die today, that's the man I'll be."

Loved that quote. Tigh is a legend.

Speaking of Battlestar...Lee's defense of Baltar was excellent.

Lee Adama wrote:

What would you have done? If he had refused to surrender, the Cylons would have probably nuked the planet right then and there. So did he appear to cooperate with the Cylons? Sure. So did hundreds of others. What's the difference between him and them? The President issued a blanket pardon. They were all forgiven, no questions asked. Colonel Tigh. Colonel Tigh used suicide bombers, killed dozens of people. Forgiven. Lieutenant Agathon and Chief Tyrol. They murdered an officer on the Pegasus. Forgiven. The Admiral. The Admiral instigated a military coup d'état against the President. Forgiven. And me? Well, where do I begin? I shot down a civilian passenger ship, the Olympic Carrier. Over a thousand people on board. Forgiven. I raised my weapon to a superior officer, committed an act of mutiny. Forgiven. And then on the very day when Baltar surrendered to those Cylons, I as commander of Pegasus jumped away. I left everybody on that planet, alone, undefended, for months. I even tried to persuade the Admiral never to return, to abandon you all there for good. If I'd had my way nobody would have made it off that planet. I'm the coward. I'm the traitor. I'm forgiven. I'd say we are very forgiving of mistakes. We make our own laws now; our own justice. And we've been pretty creative in finding ways to let people off the hook for everything from theft to murder. And we've had to be, because... because we're not a civilization anymore. We are a gang, and we are on the run, and we have to fight to survive. We have to break rules. We have to bend laws. We have to improvise. But not this time, no. Not this time. Not for Gaius Baltar. No, you... you have to die, because, well, because we don't like you very much. Because you're arrogant. Because you're weak. Because you're a coward, and we, the mob, want to throw you out of the airlock, because you didn't stand up to the Cylons and get yourself killed in the process. That's justice now. You should have been killed back on New Caprica, but since you had the temerity to live, we're going to execute you now. That's justice. This case... this case is built on emotion, on anger, bitterness, vengeance. But most of all, it is built on shame. It's about the shame of what we did to ourselves back on that planet. It's about the guilt of those of us who ran away. Who ran away. And we're trying to dump all that guilt and all that shame on one man and then flush him out the airlock, and hope that just gets rid of it all. So that we could live with ourselves. But that won't work. That won't work. That's not justice; not to me. Not to me.

Da Shins Kelly

"We don't need a criminal lawyer, we need a criminal lawyer." - Jesse giving Walt some advice in Breaking Bad

"You're not going to believe this. The guy killed 16 Czechoslovakians. He was an interior decorator." - Paulie's misunderstanding in The Sopranos

"There's an old Italian saying: 'You **** up once, you lose two teeth'." - Tony in The Sopranos

Mindkiller

"You had me at 'Meat Tornado'."

Ron Mother****ing Swanson

Dr.Reid

"I've taken Maris to hundreds of these events and she has not once wanted to dance. Of course, Maris hates public displays of rhythm" - Niles Crane, Frasier

bpb101

RobertFoster wrote: »

"Got your back, Jack. Bitches be crazy." - Sheldon (quoting someone else), The Big Bang Theory

the mail man if i do so to believe...

tony1kenobi

"Psychiatry and cunnilingus brought us to this" - Tony Soprano.

salutations

From the Inbetweeners when the boys are driving around in their yellow ****box and suddenly decide to start following some random car full of women thinking they are going to pull them.Will isnt too happy and complains about it, to which Jay responds......

Jay " They love it, you tool. It's called flirting."
Will "Yeah, a terrifying and unsolicited form of flirting"

grohlisagod

"She was like a candle in the wind (in tone of loving reminiscence). Unreliable." - Garth Marenghi's Darkplace.

The Sopranos (It's a full scene really) [They're playing golf]
Tony - "Uncle Jun's into the muff. Oh, did I say muff, I meant rough."
. . .
"What's that smell? Did you guys go to a sushi bar?"
. . .
"I thought you were a Baccalla man Uncle Jun.
What you doing eating sushi?"
. . .
[Sings] "South of the border where the tuna fish play"

amacachi

From IASIP, probably better to see it though!


Dennis: The whole purpose of buying the boat in the first place was to get the ladies nice and tipsy top side, so we can take them to a nice comfortable place below deck, and you know, they can't refuse...because of the implication.
Mac: Okay you had me goin' there for the first half. The second half kinda threw me.
Dennis: Well dude, think about it. She's out in the middle of nowhere, with some dude she barely knows. She looks around and what does she see? Nothing but open ocean. "Ah there's nowhere for me to run! What am I gonna do, say no?"
Mac: Okay. That seems really dark.
Dennis: It's not dark, you're misunderstanding me, bro.
Mac: I think I am.
Dennis: Yeah, you are. Because if the girl said 'no', then the answer is obviously 'no'. But the thing is she is not gonna say no. She would never say 'no', because of the implication.
Mac: Ok, now that's the second time you've said that word, what implication?
Dennis: The implication that things might go wrong for her if she refuses to sleep with me. Not that things are gonna go wrong for her, but she's thinking that they will.
Mac: ... But it sounds like she doesn't want to have sex with you..
Dennis: Why aren't you understanding this?