Passenger pissy seven.

mikom · 17-08-2011 1:18pm #1

French star Depardieu relieves himself in plane
French film actor Gerard Depardieu was caught short on a Paris to Dublin flight and chose not to bother going to the toilet before relieving himself, airline CityJet told AFP on Wednesday.

"I will only confirm that he, in effect, urinated in the plane," a spokeswoman for the Air France-KLM subsidiary said, confirming a report on Europe 1 radio, which interviewed a passenger who witnessed the incident.
According to the passenger, who was not named, the 62-year-old was visibly inebriated and tried to stand up before take-off, when passengers are asked to wear seatbelts, declaring: "I want to piss, I want to piss."

When a stewardess asked him to sit and wait 15 minutes until the jet took off and reached cruising altitude, he said he could not wait. "And there and then he stood up and did it on the floor," she told the French broadcaster.

"We could see he had been drinking. The stewardess was dumbfounded," she added. "No-one said anything. It all happened with courtesy. Mr Depardieu sat back down and the plane returned to the parking area to be cleaned."

The spokeswoman said the incident had taken place on Tuesday evening on board flight AF5010. She did not say whether the company intended to take further action against the popular French star.
According to a Paris Airports website, the Dublin route is served by an Avro RJ-85, a regional jet that can carry up to 111 passengers and is routinely equipped with onboard toilets both fore and aft.

Depardieu is perhaps the best known face in French cinema, having appeared in almost 200 films, and is known abroad as the star of the 1990 literary epic Cyrano de Bergerac and the US romantic comedy Green Card.
He is also a winemaker and in 1990 was convicted of drunk driving.

What would you have done?

cosmicfart · 17-08-2011 1:19pm

I love Wesley Snipe films

17-08-2011 1:19pm

I'd have asked for a cup.

stupidusername · 17-08-2011 1:19pm

that guys films are so hot!

mawk · 17-08-2011 1:20pm

Thats taking the..biscuit.

mikom · 17-08-2011 1:21pm

cosmicfart wrote: »

I love Wesley Snipe films

Always bet on yellow.

seamus · 17-08-2011 1:21pm

Ah we all get caught short sometimes. Though probably not so publically. I was driving down to Limerick once and felt the urge, but thought I could hold on until I got to our destination. Nuh-uh. Had to pull over on the side of M7 and take a wee. We were only 5km from the next exit but I physically couldn't hold it any more. It was an emergency.

Sweetest piss ever, but sweet jaysus I never want to do it again. I feel his pain.

CardBordWindow · 17-08-2011 1:23pm

Pissing on planes seems to be popular this week!

Rubecula · 17-08-2011 1:23pm

Deleted User wrote: »

I'd have asked for a cup.

A cup of Depardieu's pee? Everyone to their own but frankly if I was drinking on the plane it wouldn't be a cup of that.

orourkeda · 17-08-2011 1:25pm

At least he's not a cork wanker.

Mint Sauce · 17-08-2011 1:29pm

orourkeda wrote: »

At least he's not a cork wanker.

Damn you!! That was going to be my line.

:mad:

Sooopie · 17-08-2011 1:33pm

orourkeda wrote: »

At least he's not a cork wanker.

"I had a sore back, so took some solpadine"

Sooopie · 17-08-2011 1:35pm

He would have unirinated with a great style and aplum & have been so charming after you'd have forgiven him.

discus · 17-08-2011 1:38pm

seamus wrote: »

Ah we all get caught short sometimes. Though probably not so publically. I was driving down to Limerick once and felt the urge, but thought I could hold on until I got to our destination. Nuh-uh. Had to pull over on the side of M7 and take a wee. We were only 5km from the next exit but I physically couldn't hold it any more. It was an emergency.

Sweetest piss ever, but sweet jaysus I never want to do it again. I feel his pain.

That happened myself - but it was with the ****s. I was on the M4 to galway at 7am... Had to go off road to find somewhere, but all the fields had farmers in them. Within a minute I came to a Kepak Slaughtering Plant... They brought me to a toilet that was on the slaughtering floor - had to open my bowels to the soundtrack of cattle being herded and killed. Blood all over the toilet floor too from the workers boots

Frank Black · 17-08-2011 1:44pm

Sounds like it would make a good film - a charming comedy of manners that the French do so well.
And who better to play the part of the bumbling French passenger than the great actor Gerard Depardieu?

orourkeda · 17-08-2011 1:46pm

Sooopie wrote: »

"I had a sore back, so took some solpadine"

" me auld bladder is at me "

Sooopie · 17-08-2011 1:48pm

orourkeda wrote: »

" me auld bladder is at me "

I wonder if Gerald Keane has taken the poor lad in as he deals with the shame of weegate

crazygeryy · 17-08-2011 2:22pm

Sooopie wrote: »

He would have unirinated with a great style and aplum & have been so charming after you'd have forgiven him.

how do you urinate with aplum?

whiskeyman · 17-08-2011 2:41pm

crazygeryy wrote: »

how do you urinate with aplum?

Sounds more like he pissed out of dis pear...

And he's French, so oui oui!

Local-womanizer · 17-08-2011 2:49pm

I would have opened the window and pissed out of that obviously, typical French :rolleyes:

blaze1 · 17-08-2011 2:55pm

Ahh it all happened with courtesy.... Thats ok then

If I was on there i wouldve kicked bells out him... Size of his nose, He could have all sorts of explosive material up there...

The question should be what would Ryanair have done if that was one of there flights? Do they have a soiling charge in place?

17-08-2011 3:03pm

/facepalm

it's aplomb
he wasn't urinating with fruit

Sooopie · 17-08-2011 3:08pm

bluewolf wrote: »

/facepalm

it's aplomb
he wasn't urinating with fruit

Saila · 17-08-2011 3:18pm

oh la la! :eek:

policarp · 17-08-2011 3:27pm

Possibly auditioning for the remake of "Free Willy".

DundalkDuffman · 17-08-2011 3:39pm

Could have been worse, it could have been a Sun headline

"Gerard Did-a-poo"

Sooopie · 17-08-2011 3:45pm

AHHH oui oui

Fratton Fred · 17-08-2011 4:07pm

In fairness, the toilets on those cityjet planes are tiny so he probably wouldn't have fitted in anyway.

Frank Black · 17-08-2011 4:39pm

Fratton Fred wrote: »

In fairness, the toilets on those cityjet planes are tiny so he probably wouldn't have fitted in anyway.

He would but he might have had to leave his nose outside.

foxinsox · 17-08-2011 5:08pm

blast him with p...

Ghandee · 17-08-2011 10:12pm

Depardieu to star in Dumb and Dumber 2!
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/celebritynews/8707789/Gerard-Depardieu-sorry-to-have-urinated-on-plane-carpet.html

Gerard Depardieu's entourage has said he tried to urinate into a bottle "as discreetly as possible" while on a flight, and said he was "sorry" to have spilt some on the plane's carpet.

The French actor was caught short on a Paris to Dublin flight after the seat belt sign had been switched on for take-off. With the lavatories closed, the 62-year-old called out "I need to piss, I need to piss". But the cabin crew said no.

So the corpulent star of Cyrano de Bergerac, Jean de Florette and Green Card decides to take matters into his own hands. It is understood the movie star got out of his seat and tried to relieve himself into an empty bottle at the back of the plane but also peed on the floor.

While the scene may have brought the house down in French cinema theatres, the real-life incident failed to raise a laugh on Tuesday from irate passengers of the Dublin-based City Jet airline; they were told Mr Depardieu's antics meant the plane would be grounded for two hours while staff cleaned the carpet.

The French star, who was travelling with two companions, was thrown off the flight with his luggage and told to book another one.

Friends of the actor said he was “completely sober” but desperate to relieve himself. At first he was told he had 15 minutes to wait, but then due to congestion on the runway, he was informed he would have to endure another 20 minutes, they said.

Given his “irrepressible need”, his two travel companions, including the French actor Edouard Baer, offered him an empty bottle as a last resort.

They said he had no choice but to use it, but that he did it “without any provocation and after making sure he wasn’t seen”.

A little urine was spilt on the floor, which the actor offered to clean up himself, saying he was “sorry” for the inconvenience caused, they said.

“No proceedings or fine were signalled to him and he had the feeling the misunderstanding and the inflexible attitude of the hostess were understood by his interlocutors,” they said.

An outraged female passenger told France's Europe 1 radio: "Mr Depardieu got up, calling out 'I need to piss, I need to piss'" as the plane was heading to the runway.

"The air hostess replied: 'I am sorry, you'll have to wait 15 minutes until we are in the air, everyone is strapped in, the lavatories are shut, I can do nothing for you.'

"He said: 'No, I cannot wait.' He got up, and did it on the ground.

"The hostess was shocked, but nothing was said –everything was done courteously."

"Mr Depardieu sat down again, and we went back to the plane parking space."

The passengers said she was "outraged" by an actor who "thinks he is not like others, that he has to abide by their rules. He could've waited a couple of minutes."

City Jet confirmed that an incident took place but declined to name the individual involved.

On Twitter, CityJet chose to see the funny side of the incident.

"As you may have seen on the news, we are busy mopping the floor of one of our planes this morning...," read a first message.

A second read: "We'd also like to remind all passengers that our planes are fully equipped with toilet facilities..."

Mr Depardieu's agent said he declined to comment on the incident.

This is by no means the famously tempestuous food and wine-loving star's first brush with controversy.

In 2005, he smoked on a Jonathan Ross chat show on BBC ONE, and branded his fellow countrymen a bunch of "cretins". Later that year he knocked out a paparazzo with a headbutt after he photographed him with a female companion.

Solnskaya · 17-08-2011 10:17pm

in fairness, the airlines have been taking the p1ss for years. Obelix gets even! Probably happened to us all anyway....

My name is URL · 17-08-2011 10:18pm

He sounds like a pretty cool guy

17-08-2011 10:19pm

He should wear Adult nappies, if he cant hold his piss. A child wouldnt have done what he did.
On a short flight too, imagine if he was flying to the Seychelles, my jaze..

Dirty bastard. People like him should be made to clean up their own piss, not have some poor soul at the airline. I would not have let him leave the aircraft till he mopped every drop up.

strokemyclover · 17-08-2011 10:24pm

Why didn't he do that to Andie MacDowell in Green Card!

Stinicker · 17-08-2011 10:30pm

Poor guy didn't have enough change to pay Ryanair's new levy "taking the p1ss charge"

raveni · 17-08-2011 10:31pm

Jake1 wrote: »

Dirty bastard. People like him should be made to clean up their own piss, not have some poor soul at the airline. I would not have let him leave the aircraft till he mopped every drop up.

He did offer to clean it up, in fairness.

Magic Beans · 17-08-2011 10:31pm

What would it have hurt to let the man use the toilet with a bit of dignity? He's 62, men of that age of have problems with prostate etc. Stupid decision by the cabin crew.

Ricardo G · 17-08-2011 10:33pm

Himself and Neil prenderville would make a great duo

alchemist33 · 17-08-2011 10:34pm

First they cheat us at sports. Now they're pissing on our planes. Les batards.

KungPao · 17-08-2011 10:34pm

Why did he do it?

Who nose?

Bipolar Joe · 17-08-2011 10:36pm

I just love the differing versions of the story. So he just stood up, let his peener out and pissed on the floor, you say?

starbelgrade · 17-08-2011 10:42pm

The guy's a class actor. He could blast a plane with piss & he'd still be cool as fuck.

iguana · 17-08-2011 10:44pm

Magic Beans wrote: »

What would it have hurt to let the man use the toilet with a bit of dignity? He's 62, men of that age of have problems with prostate etc. Stupid decision by the cabin crew.

The plane was taxiing to the runway at the time, for it's slot for take-off. You can't use the toilets in those circumstances, it would be completely illegal. Any cabin member who allowed someone use the toilet during take-off would have lost their job and the airline would probably have gotten in trouble too. They would have been in the air within a few minutes. But instead he ended up delaying everybody on his plane for 2 hours. If he knows his bodily control is so poor that he can't hold it for short periods he should be wearing incontinence aids.