Lonely question

LegacyUser

I have been living in Dublin for the past few years. I have always felt very isolated and lonely. I don't have much friends or anyone here. I know there are a lot of things to do and social clubs where I can meet others. I don't know if I would fit in, im unemployed and I don't know what my prospects are or if anyone could relate to me. Then I would feel even more depressed and isolated. I should just give it go and see.
My question is, is there anyone out there in the same situation as me and did you join some clubs and things, How did you find it, did you meet any good friends out of it? Did it help you?

danslevent

I'm going to a college in September where I don't really know anyone else going so I have a fear of this happening to me too.

I have been in new social situations before and I think the only thing you can do is make an effort to go out and meet new people. Maybe try think of a hobby you enjoy and pursue that. Since you are unemployed maybe do some volunteer work? I know in my area there are loads of charity shops looking for volunteers.

Even try going to your local community centers and have a look at the signs on the billboards. I always see things like free first aid classes or things like that. It would fill up your Cv and aid you in getting to know new people and entering into social situations. It'll give you experience in talking to people and making friends again.

Fitting in can be hard, as you mentioned, but I find when talking to people and you are having difficulty, just keep asking questions. People enjoy talking about themselves and it will make you seem interested in them and friendly.

Good luck OP, I hope things look up

BattleCorp

Hi. I was in a similar situation to yourself but in a small town down the country. I didn't handle a relationship break up very well and I pretty much withdrew from society. I was lonely, didn't go out or do anything. After feeling sorry for myself for six months, I woke up one day and decided that my future was in my own hands. I had an instant attitude change and it worked. I just went out and did stuff. Haven't looked back since.

Best thing is to get out there and do stuff. DANSLEVENT has a good point, go do some volunteer work. By helping others you will feel better about yourself and possibly make new friendships. No point sitting at home worrying what people think of you as you will only make yourself more depressed. As for worrying about not having anything in common with the people you will meet - so what! Get 100 people in the room and you won't find 2 of them with the same hobbies and interests. We are all different.

Just get out there and see what happens.

vinniemac

There are thousands of people in your situation. Have a look at www.meetup.com. It's a site broken into groups based on common interests as well as a number of social groups. It's brilliant for anyone new in town or newly single or for people who have been "left behind" when other friends got married and had kids. I've been a member for a few months and it's been brilliant for me. This week I've been at a coffee meetup, out for a meal with a group of about 20 people and out playing pool with another group. Off to the theatre tonight and meeting for drinks later. It's not a dating site, although it's a great way to meet members of the opposite sex, and there's no cost in joining. I've no affiliation with the site other than being a happy member