Can we remain friends??

LegacyUser

I met this female friend through work two years ago(I am female also), and we bonded instantly. We get on so well and are very close. I feel I could tell her anything.
We both like to work hard and play hard and we share many hobbies so we tend to spend a lot of time together. A really good mate basically...

Thing is she recently started letting me know a different side to her and I don't like it. Basically my gut instinct is that she is motivated by money and money only. It began a few months ago when she told me that she felt her current boyfriend was not making her happy because they couldn't do everything she wanted, eg more holidays, nights out, etc. I thought she was making excuses cus she just didn't fancy him as much anymore. Then she was asked out by a guy who went on a few meetings later to offer to pay her college fees if she was stuck (boyfriend is still in the picture).
She says she is seriously considering the offer as she only has one life and needs to "maximise her opportunities". She told me drunkenly that boyfriend is not the one as his job(tradesman) is not good enough for her and she deserves better from life. This remark really bothered me and I ended up leaving the pub we were in without her.

My impression is that now that she has told me how she feels she can discuss it with me and seek my advice. On every occasion we have met up she has brought it up. She says she wants to be with somone of status no matter what the circumstances(eg doesn't love them etc), and has changed her lifestyle to support this. She never just wants to hang out anymore(eg go to dinner, cinema, go for drinks etc.) Its all about exclusive(supposed) nightclubs, meeting guys for dinner who very obviously only want one thing. Bear in mind boyfriend is still in the picture, apparently he's useful for mid-week nights according to her! And he doesn't know about these secret dinners.

Thing is when a friend is a friend do you support them no-matter what? I mean, this girl is a great person(was) and this all started a few months back and I keep thinking she will relax or stop this crap but part of me is thinking I have gained a ****ty friend. Bottom line is knowing this is how she feels about the people around her and her goals in life makes me sick and goes against everything I believe in people. I also contemplated that perhaps my judge of character had a some time off when I became friends with this girl but other poeple who don't know this side to her love her to bits. It's as though my morals are being compromised by my manners and my desire to be friends with this girl. One day I'm thinking bffs and the next I feel disgusted by her behaviour. I feel terrible for her boyfriend aswell, I know him but not very well. Help!

Milk & Honey

She is not your kind of person. She is a user. She will always be reasonably popular because she is an effective manipulator. You should reverse out of her life gradually but definitely. Avoid a bust up or showdown. Just wind things down gradually.

LegacyUser

Next time she brings up the stuff your not comfortable with tell her so, that you think its wrong and dont agree with what shes doing. Remind her she has a boyfriend and if she wants to persue other men, fair enough but you dont agree with her stringing him along for fringe benifits. Basically tell her what you've written here, that you are not happy to be an accomplice to her gold digging (maybe not in such blunt words though!)