stag/hen = full invite?

TheChevron

Is an afters invite acceptable for some people who went on hen/stag, or should they be invited to full thing?

stargazer 68

Personally I think it depends on what the stag/hen is. If its a few beers down the pub then an evening invite is okay. However if its a weekend away then an evening invite only is a bit off. But others will clearly disagree if you read other similar threads.

D3PO

if they are close enough for you to extend a stags / hens invite they should be clsoe enough to invite to the full wedding.

Personally id consider anything else as the invitee wanting me as a rent a crowd because they are billy no mates and dont want their stag to look stupid.

Cathmandooo

Unless the wedding is seriously small, a family only type thing, then it would be rude to invite someone to a hen/stag and not to the full wedding.

I hate 'evening' invites anyway but that's another story

Frank Black

OP you can read through the hysterical posts on a similar thread if you dare. However, personally speaking I wouldn’t see a problem with this. I’ve been to two stags where I didn’t get an invite to the wedding. I wasn’t life-long buddies with the guys in question but they were work colleagues and the fact I didn’t get an invite to the wedding didn’t bother me in the least. Similarly I invited a few of the lads I worked with on my stag without inviting them to my wedding - didn’t strike me as in any way strange at the time. Most people know far more people through work or as friends of friends than it would be possible to invite to a wedding (esp if you’re trying to keep costs down). Anybody who mentions ‘rent a crowd’ doesn’t live in the real world and you should discount their opinion.
Having said that the stags in question were held in Ireland as opposed to abroad.

Toots

Dovies wrote: »

Personally I think it depends on what the stag/hen is. If its a few beers down the pub then an evening invite is okay. However if its a weekend away then an evening invite only is a bit off. But others will clearly disagree if you read other similar threads.

I'd agree with this, if the stag is local then I wouldn't see a problem with an afters invite, but if you're going away and it's going to cost them a good bit (nights or weekends away always do) then I'd either invite them to the full day or not invite them to the stag.

TheChevron

The stag is a weekend (2 nights), in a nearby Irish city (1.5 hours drive). It roughly costs about €80 before drinks. Not rent a crowd either, as there are over 30 going.

They are people who I bump into out and about occasionally and have a few drinks with and are always up for a bit of craic. Also a couple of people I play sports with who I asked in a kind of a, "sure come along if you want", kind of way.

saintsaltynuts

TheChevron wrote: »

Is an afters invite acceptable for some people who went on hen/stag, or should they be invited to full thing?

Getting invited to half a wedding is bad enough but half a stags....good luck.

TheChevron

saintsaltynuts wrote: »

Getting invited to half a wedding is bad enough but half a stags....good luck.

What you on about?

Frank Black

TheChevron wrote: »

The stag is a weekend (2 nights), in a nearby Irish city (1.5 hours drive). It roughly costs about €80 before drinks. Not rent a crowd either, as there are over 30 going.

They are people who I bump into out and about occasionally and have a few drinks with and are always up for a bit of craic. Also a couple of people I play sports with who I asked in a kind of a, "sure come along if you want", kind of way.

For the situation you outlined you don’t need to issue a full invitation – invite to the afters would be grand.
These days a lot of people are glad not to get a wedding invite as it costs a lot of money to attend.

Dermo

TheChevron wrote: »

The stag is a weekend (2 nights), in a nearby Irish city (1.5 hours drive). It roughly costs about €80 before drinks. Not rent a crowd either, as there are over 30 going.

They are people who I bump into out and about occasionally and have a few drinks with and are always up for a bit of craic. Also a couple of people I play sports with who I asked in a kind of a, "sure come along if you want", kind of way.

This is more an informal stag. It's getting more and more popular among men. No specific invites but just casually saying to people "sure come along if you want".
If I was you I would make sure that everyone on the stag is at least invited to the afters, but it isn't essential to have them at the full wedding.

TheChevron

Dermo wrote: »

This is more an informal stag. It's getting more and more popular among men. No specific invites but just casually saying to people "sure come along if you want".
If I was you I would make sure that everyone on the stag is at least invited to the afters, but it isn't essential to have them at the full wedding.

You hit the nail on the head there.

ElleEm

I'd say that if you invited people to spend a full weekend away with you to celebrate your impending nuptuals, that they should be invited to your wedding.

clairemc29

I think its different for men and women.. Men usually have more 'acquaintances' who they know and drink with through work, sports, the local etc etc, people they dont necessarily see that often but have a laugh with whenever they meet up. Whereas women usually have a smaller group of close friends who would meet up more regularly and spend more time together.

So if its a large group of men you are inviting most of them prob just see it as another excuse for a pi** up and would be happy with an invite to the afters, whereas some women might get offended if they got invited to a hen and not the full wedding, if they are close to the bride to be.. that's how i usually look at it!!