Totally desperate- is this bullying? What can I do??

HelpPlease02

This is a long post, so pleaseÂ*stickÂ*with me..
Â*
3 years ago I joined the Civil Service from the Private Sector after being made redundant from my job (which i' had loved). I was delighted to get a new position and arrived 'suited and booted', ready to put my head down and work hard. I knew the culture would be different but figured that as long as I had was positive and careful not to tread on anyones toes, things should be ok. Unfortunately the reality was very different as my new manager took an instant dislike to me. She's a career Civil Servant who dropped out of college and whose entire life (social and work) revolves around the office. She spends all her day working and gossipping, and every evening down the bar with her cronies bitching about work and their workmates). For instance when the students were protesting about the reintroduction to fees, she kept ranting about how they should all just get jobs? (recession anyone?)
Despite numerous attempts to get on her good side her contempt for me was unmovable.

I thought that perhaps something I was doing something unconsciously that might have been irritating her so I tried changing my behaviour to see how she reacted. I tried being friendly / staying out of her way / working late / staying quiet / volunteering for extra work and everything else in between. It seemed that no matter what I did, nothing could improve the relationship. Over that first few months in the new job things deteriorated dramatically. Whenever I'd ask a question; my manager would ignore it and leave me looking like and idiot in front of the other employees. When she did answer a question it would be in a berating manner. The kind of answer that offers no real guidance while making you feel like a fool. I was also responsible for managing Junior staff and she would bitch about me to them behind my back.

During this time I became very stressed. All of my other co-workers and also the staff reporting to me could see what was going on and at different times approached me saying they felt it was unfair. Being the new kid on the block and not too sure how the organisational culture worked, I wasn't sure how to proceed. I'm in no way a 'push over' but this manager was a very domineering personality and as she held all of the knowledge about how work was done in the section and wasn't sharing it with me. she was playing me like a puppet.

Eventually I reached the end of my patience and emailed the manager directly. I highlighted her behaviour and explained that I wasn't sure why she had a problem with me. I had done everything that was expected of me and was always proactive in work. She reacted in shock and said she was completely unaware of her treatment of me. (This was verbal - she never replied to the email).

Over the next few months things improved slightly as she stayed out of my way and vice verse, but this was short lived. Her manager would assign me tasks directly which would drive her crazy. Instead of acknowledging that I had been assigned the extra workload by the senior manager, she would instead put pressure on me to complete other work for her and complain about me being assigned work because I work for her. For me this was an awkward situation. As an employee it's not my place dictate what work I should do and the issue arose because more senior managers were not discussing matters with each other.

Again I became very stressed trying to juggle and impossible quantity of work and deadlines with little / no support. My Manager began bitching to other staff again and would complain to me in front of others in the office. During this time I successfully managed two projects which were time consuming but received no acknowledgement from my manager on any of them. I was getting tired of feeling like crap in work and constantly being put down by my managers snide comments. I made my views know to a more senior manager in HR and he did his best to improve the situation, but to no avail.

At my annual review my manager gave me the mark of 'average' despite all of the extra projects I had completed and the fact that the section had received

emails praising my work.

I disputed the mark and refused to sign off saying that I wanted to review to be sent to a 3rd party for assessment as was my right. My manager said she would take care of it. A month later I discovered that the mark had been submitted without my sign off and entered on the HR system as my review grade for the year. I couldn't believe it. I was tired of everyday being a fight and left the review grade sit where it was as I tried to figure out what to do.

Over the next few months things got worse and I was told by colleagues that my Manager had been complaining about me to others 'in the bar'. I was becoming depressed with the whole situation and was loosing my will to get up and go into work every morning. Soon afterwards I became sick and despite emailing and texting my manager she never responded. When I came back into work she completely ignored my presence, even when it was just the two of us in the room. Not a single word to even recognise the fact i had returned to the office after a 4 day sick absence..

I became sick again and again received no acknowledgement from my manager despite several texts and emails providing her with updates. While I was out I received a text from a more senior manager in HR telling me that when I returned I would be moving section. He said that it was to try and give me a break from my manager. When I returned to work I discovered that my manager had been telling staff that she had organised the move as I wasn't good enough for the section. I felt completely humiliated and submitted an informal complaint detailing my experiences to HR. I had done nothing wrong and yet here I was being moved and she was staying where she was. I asked the HR manager and he assured me that the move was not because of my manager and gave me an option to stay in my current section if I wanted, so that people wouldn't think she was pulling the strings. At that stage I just wanted out. I asked the HR manager about the new section I was going to and was told it was a well known as 'a trouble section' where other staff had alot of issues and had wanted to leave. But it was all he could offer at that time. I was told the move would be for one month only after which time I could choose what section I wanted to go to.

I was left in the new section for 4 months, working unsociable hours. I still hadn't recovered from my illness and found the hours and the natureÂ*of the work was having a negative impact on my health. I told HR and explained that my doctor had suggested I be moved for medical reasons, but I was left where i was for a further 2 months. By now my motivation was at an all time low. Despite me arriving in the organisation with the best of intentions and a positive "get stuck in" attitude I was repeatedly let down. Finally last week I was transferred out of the "Trouble section" and back into my old section. The first thing my old manager did was to sit me down and perform my next annual review. She produced a several page document which she had obviously spent a long time preparing (in response to my complaint about her) and proceeded to systematically assassinate all of my work efforts in the sections. She awarded me the second lowest mark possible and didn't have a single positive word to say about me or my performance.

This is despite me successfully completing two work relating exams and qualifications, implementing 2 further projects successfully, doing all of the tasks involved in my role and receiving an email from a senior Manager praising my work and abilities - within the review period. I was also never given an 'Interim' review during the year which is required as part of the review process. As such this alleged under performance in a complete surprise.

At this stage I really just feel like giving up. I can't leave because of the recession but I genuinely can't stand the idea of staying as I think i'll loose my mind. I'm suffering from anxiety, stress, sleepless nights and depression. I used to be so positive and now I'm sick of listening to myself complain

Can anyone please give me some advice.. i'm meeting with HR next week about this most recent review.

mystic86

<<unhelpful nonsense removed - while you have a point, we're in the middle of a recession>>

Lux23

It sounds like the HR Manager may well be on your side so rather then making it difficult for them and bringing an official complaint against the offending Manager I would ask for an immediate and permanent transfer somewhere else. I think that's the best all round for you although it does sound to me that other people are aware of this woman's behaviour.

looksee

That is a very rational and well written summary of your situation, suggest you take it, or a suitable version of it, with you to your meeting with HR.

Mrs OBumble

Have you been to your union?

HelpPlease02

Thanks for your responses, they're VERY much appreciated. Unfortunately I work in HR and that's where all of this has taken place!

It really makes things more awkward & embarrassing as it means all of my co-workers and the staff who report to me know exactly what is going on re: complaints / talks with managers / moving sections etc..

Because of that I'm very reluctant to bring an official complaint and feel i should tread carefully not to pi55 anyone off.

I get on with all of the other members of the HR unit quiet well and if I bring a written version on my experience to the more senior manager they could take it the wrong way and think i'm complaining about them all. That could mean getting transferred back to a well known sh*t section and I really can't do that again

Unfortunately I'm not in a Union so can't go to them. Also this particular manager would be in the same union as me and is very good friends with the staff union rep 9more HR connections) meaning I wouldn't feel comfortable spilling my guts for it all to go straight back to her..

amdublin

I think speak directly with the HR manager again. Definitely sounds like they are on your side.

Ultimately I think you should move, I know she has told people some lies why you are moving but you just hold your head up high knowing the truth.

Go to new team and just draw a line under this whole aeries of episodes with this B1tch person.

Sir Oxman

just one point - I would hone in on the obviously biased negative reviews she subjected you to.
As you say, you have proof of senior management praise of your project work, I do think you let the first 'bad' review slip by - I would have nailed her on that and her failure to submit it to a third-party.
She needs to be fully exposed to her seniors and her biased reviews would point the finger directly back at her attitude with you.

It's a pity most of the advice is to move section as these kind of middle management are the bane of the public service but I understand why if your feel like you are about to lose your sanity.

I guess you have to balance the probability of her being one of the 'protected' ones against the hope and feeling that senior management will actually side with you bearing in mind sh's well got with the all-powerful PS union reps!

Answer that and you have your solution.

Claregirl

Am PS myself and unfortunately these "managers" are all too common. First off you should join the union, you don't have to deal with the local rep you can get advice and help from the head office of that union. You have a very strong case with regard to your rating being submitted without your having signed off on it. The third party reviewer should be your manager's manager and from the sounds of it he/she should be well aware of any of your managers shortcomings particularly as they are coming to you to get things done. Promotion / incremental progression is affected by your rating so it's important to get this side of things sorted. There is also an Employee Assistance service in operation and you should avail of that if possible.

Wish I could say something more positive but unfortunately there is a depressing culture of "moving or promoting problems" within the PS. Best of luck with everything try not to let it get you down!!

Tito Ortiz

Claregirl wrote: »

Am PS myself and unfortunately these "managers" are all too common. First off you should join the union, you don't have to deal with the local rep you can get advice and help from the head office of that union. You have a very strong case with regard to your rating being submitted without your having signed off on it. The third party reviewer should be your manager's manager and from the sounds of it he/she should be well aware of any of your managers shortcomings particularly as they are coming to you to get things done. Promotion / incremental progression is affected by your rating so it's important to get this side of things sorted. There is also an Employee Assistance service in operation and you should avail of that if possible.

Wish I could say something more positive but unfortunately there is a depressing culture of "moving or promoting problems" within the PS. Best of luck with everything try not to let it get you down!!

Have to agree with this post. These so called "managers" are far to common in the public sector. OP your post could have been written by me about my work place too. My only light at the end of the tunnel is these "managers" will hopefully get found out by somebody,someday !!Keep your head up you're not alone ..

reeta

Just wondering how things are going in work now....