I'd rather be a ..... than a .....

Feelgood

Was in a pub the other night and the band were playing El Condor Pasa (If I Could) by Simon and Garfunkel except they were asking the crowd to come up with the lyrics and the best one got a free pint!. This lad gets up and sings:

I'd rather be a johnny than a tampon,
Yes I would, if I could, I surely would

You got any good ones AH?

Jumpy

You mean a free schooner surely.

Jesus Wept

That surely won't be bested.

Feelgood

Jumpy wrote: »

You mean a free schooner surely.

Schooners are for the chicks ya big girls blouse!

im invisible

For some reason this song came into my head,

If I had a million dollars
(If I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you a green dress
(But not a real green dress, that's cruel)
And if I had a million dollars
(If I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you some art
(A Picasso or a Garfunkel)

*Edit, got another line

Id rather be a cigarette than a fag,,
Id rather be in push, than be in drag

Id rather be gay than be happy,
Id rather be stoned than be straight.

Swampy

I'd rather eat a Big Mac than a Fillet o'fish.

does not compute

I'd rather be asleep than awake

Pure_Cork

I'd rather be a Paki than a Dub

myflipflops

Pure_Cork wrote: »

I'd rather be a Paki than a Dub

Had this chanted at us when playing a non Dublin school in GAA once. I thought it was hilarious.

efb

I'd rather have a c0ck than a vag

Brendan Flowers

I'd rather be Callum Best than be any one of you lot

Ghandee

I'd rather be in yo're Ma than mine!

AckwelFoley

Pure_Cork wrote: »

I'd rather be a Paki than a Dub

Dublin mods be hatin

Tipsy McSwagger

I'd rather be a bogie than a klingon

ROCKMAN

I'd rather be PUSHING IN than PULLING OUT

I'd rather be a toothbrush than a toilet brush

I'd rather be judged by 12 than carried by 6

Elliemental

I'd rather be a picket than a scab.

UglyBolloxFace

Feelgood wrote: »

I'd rather be a ..... than a .....

I'd rather be a rapist than a rapee.

Big Nasty

Hammer than,............ a nail?:pac:

chillywilly

I would rather be, than not be.




/philosophy lesson for the day.

tallaghtmick

id rather be a peedo than a priest.....oh wait

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

I live near a town on the Mayo/Roscommon border with a large Pakistani population and the chant always was " I'd rather be a Paki than a Ross". Ah Ballagh, what a racist little ****hole of a town you are.

AckwelFoley

Duffy the Vampire Slayer wrote: »

I live near a town on the Mayo/Roscommon border with a large Pakistani population and the chant always was " I'd rather be a Paki than a Ross". Ah Ballagh, what a racist little ****hole of a town you are.

Pity for them though Ballaghadereen is Co Roscommon

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

snyper wrote: »

Pity for them though Ballaghadereen is Co Roscommon

For GAA its in Mayo though, hence the debate. Most of the people in the town who follow GAA regard themselves as being from Mayo.

Alwayson

I'd rather be at home than in that pub
Yes I would if I only could

orourkeda

Pure_Cork wrote: »

I'd rather be a Paki than a Dub

http://www.pubrepublik.com/contentfiles/images/pubs/big/js57IMG3492.jpg

Heres one for all you cork pakis

Ficheall

I'd rather beatification than to sink into the abyss of the unremembered.

EverEvolving

I'd rather be a numptie than a knacker!

Cianos

I'd rather be a rich person and able to afford anything I need than a pauper living hand to mouth scraping for necessities on a daily basis.

I'd rather be someone in good health than be in a wheelchair, totally dependent on the good will and patience of others.

I'd rather live in a peaceful country able to live out a fulfilling life than live somewhere where the tension of conflict is constant and many friends and family having already lost their lives.

I think I'm getting the hang of this??

Matthew23

id rather be burying someone then gettin burried

Mat23

MugMugs

Feelgood wrote: »

I'd rather be a ...... than a ......

I'd rather have boobs instead of moobs

mmmm

Boobs

sparks24

i'd rather be on the dole than get a job
yes i can work, if i wanted to, but i dont