What if you found out your friend had your facebook password and was sort of stalking

LegacyUser

i found out that a very very close friend of mine had my facebook account password for the last ages. i found my account open on her computer one day when she was not near and i never use her computer, and then she accidentally chatted to someone thinking she was on her own account afew weeks later and i saw it since i was on-line at the time and its possible to have two account open on different computers.

my password has been the same for ages, so she would have had it since i first logged on with her computer a long time ago.

so she has been reading my mails, personal chats with friends, and looking at people pages that i am friends with and she isnt. its obvious that she did because i noticed over the year how she might let slip she knew something that i knew only through chat with one of my friends

she is a very close friend i know her very well and i know her family well. we went to school together, we hang out every day text and talk and chat all the time and she is just all round a close person to me.

all i did was change my password but i dont know how to be feeling, how would you feel if you found out this about your closest friend

minidazzler

For me, I would feel a bit irked by the intrusion, but would just let it go really after changing my password.

I left myself logged in on a buddies computer before and they kept reading stuff until I changed the password, it's something I wouldn't do, but they weren't even sneaky about it and would say it out loud.

Basically, for the sake of not having an arguement about it, I would simply not say it to them.

fghijkl

all i did was change my password but i dont know how to be feeling, how would you feel if you found out this about your closest friend

I really can't imagine any of my close friends invading my privacy in such a way and for such a long time span (a whole year!! :eek:), so if they did personally i would no longer consider them a friend. Trust is a big deal for me no way could i remain friends with someone i didn't trust.

LilMissCiara

Happened to me before but it was a group of friends. I used Facebook Mail instead of texting a lot so had a lot of personal (embarrassing) stuff and admittedly some gossip. I only found out about it a year later so now if it's mentioned all I can do is cringe and laugh.

As long as there is nothing bad (bitchy etc) then your main problem is do you trust her?

Make sure she knows you found out and talk to her (in a nice way).

Firetrap

I'd be absolutely livid to be honest and would never trust her again. How dare she :mad:

johnboysligo

insert_name wrote:

all i did was change my password but i dont know how to be feeling, how would you feel if you found out this about your closest friend

change ALL your passwords you cant be 100% certain the only thing she has access to is your facebook login details.

Firetrap

That's a very good point. Change everything. Have you any idea how she found out in the first place?

thefeatheredcat

insert_name wrote:

so she has been reading my mails, personal chats with friends, and looking at people pages that i am friends with and she isnt. its obvious that she did because i noticed over the year how she might let slip she knew something that i knew only through chat with one of my friends

she is a very close friend i know her very well and i know her family well. we went to school together, we hang out every day text and talk and chat all the time and she is just all round a close person to me.

all i did was change my password but i dont know how to be feeling, how would you feel if you found out this about your closest friend

your closest friend would not choose to impersonate you on the internet and snoop into your private business, have personal chats with your friends online pretending to be you (I assume this could be possible if the chats were deleted afterwards), and looking at your friend's pages that otherwise she may not have access to.

your closest friend would instead say "you left yourself logged in on my computer" or "google remembered your password on my computer, I've deleted all history and active logins on firefox, but you might want to change your password in case someone used my computer in meantime". (if this is the case of how she got access, I would assume something like that)
They would tell you honestly and let you know about it rather than pretending it never happened, hoping to never be caught out.

I have been given passwords to various email and facebook accounts of family members but would never dream of using them, unless asked to for the reasons they were given out of respect for their privacy.

tbh if I were in your shoes, I'd be fairly ticked off to say the least and would be thinking twice about trusting her because the decent and honest thing to do when finding you logged in on fb (or anything else, like email banking, boards, whatever) on her computer would be to be upfront about it and not sneakily accessing your account as and when she felt like it. Reading messages or looking at profiles is forgiveable for curiosity's sake, but overall impersonating you I wouldn't accept.

change all your passwords as I would say if she is that sneaky to use your facebook, then probably would have tried accessing your email and other accounts with that same or similar password.

ask yourself this: if it was a stranger that found you logged in in an internet cafe doing the exact same thing and by chance you found out about it, would you think yourself having licence to be angry at your privacy being violated and having someone possibly misrepresent you by impersonating you?

Bluntly bring it up with your friend and watch her squirm.

Sometimes people do naughty things, spur of the moment, thrills, whatever. But a friend would tell you afterwards. Once is not a big deal, but consistently invading your privacy like that isn't a naughty slip, it's a step over a clear line, and is very sly IMO. If she's going to do something like that, she should have the guts to own up to it. Bring it up in conversation and wait for your explanation.

keithclancy

Just send a message to yourself

I.E

Hi "Friend"

Know you have been reading these messages, if you could just send a message from my account to my account and explain why you've been indulging in this creepy behaviour then that would be great.

This is equivalent of having a key to my house and sniffing my things.

Regards,
Creeped out

Change your passwords anyway, that just ain't right.
Sometimes you leave your account logged in and you might get the odd fraping, but a long term thing like that is weird.

I am a friend

I would go crazy... Thes absurd behaviour... Why would they bother...

I would have it out with him / her and then lose them.

So if they are staying in your house do they snoop through the drawers??? Its that level of invasion of privacy. Just because its online, doesnt make it any less serious...

tinkerbell

I would be livid if a supposed friend did that to me. You need to confront her about it, I wouldn't let that go. And change every single password you have.

Fea.

OP, change your passwords regularly, its the only way to keep your private life private. I had a incident a few years ago where my husband hacked into my laptop, read all my private things and then started up a bogus account to make friends with people on my friends list to talk to them without me knowing. Talk about freaked out !!!! I had nothing to hide so that wasn't what was worrying me, what really upset me was that he obviously had no trust in me, even though I had never given him one single reason not to trust me.

This girl might be your best friend, but best friends don't carry on like that. It shows a side of her nature that you never knew existed until now and unfortunately, now you'll never forget it either. I haven't.

Keep safe hun xxx

Too many people in this world to keep up a friendship like that... Complete and utter bltch.

ziedth

keithclancy wrote: »

Just send a message to yourself

I.E

Hi "Friend"

Know you have been reading these messages, if you could just send a message from my account to my account and explain why you've been indulging in this creepy behaviour then that would be great.

This is equivalent of having a key to my house and sniffing my things.

Regards,
Creeped out

Change your passwords anyway, that just ain't right.
Sometimes you leave your account logged in and you might get the odd fraping, but a long term thing like that is weird.

I love this idea and she couldn't even admit it then.

liah

Firetrap wrote: »

That's a very good point. Change everything. Have you any idea how she found out in the first place?

This is the part I don't get.

Either a) she's never deleted her history/cookies or logged into her own account and you selected "remember" when you logged in, but that's incredibly unlikely as I imagine she has her own facebook account

b) she uses Google Chrome and you (or her, but you would've been there?) saved the details - in Chrome, you can go into options and view all saved passwords

or c) she keylogged you (if this is the case, cut her out.).

Outside of those scenarios, I just really, really don't understand how she could possibly know your password, unless it was something really obvious and she just guessed it - in which case, learn to make better passwords.

Either way, I really wouldn't trust her and I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who would not respect my privacy even if they did know the password. If she's that close of a friend, however, I would confront her and give her a chance to explain herself before cutting her out. But she needs to know that you know what she's at.

tawnyowl

I'd be very annoyed if I was in your position - this is a serious breach of trust.

Did you figure out how they got your password?

Reesy

johnboysligo wrote: »

change ALL your passwords you cant be 100% certain the only thing she has access to is your facebook login details.

Lots of people have easy to crack passwords (see e.g. her ehttp://www.troyhunt.com/2011/06/brief-sony-password-analysis.html) - if you are still worried, change your communications passwords for something hard to crack - and if you're one of the people who keep their passwords in a simple text / word file or on a page, consider changing to something like passwordsafe from sourceforge. This is just basic good practice.

Eric Cartman

Mate thats weird , change all your passwords and never talk to that person again , thats actually just sick