I'm going to knock down a random cyclist the next time they skip a red light...

thebigbiffo

They all think they're so great with their eco-friendly, health conscious way to get to work. But in general they're the biggest scumbag, inconsiderate road users you're ever likely to come across. Now that it's the time of the year again where it's warm even if it's raining every asshole with a bike decides to 'beat the traffic' of 'get a little more exercise in'.

I drive a scooter - i know, equally annoying sometimes - and over the last 3-4 weeks I've seen some cyclists do some pretty dangerous and annoying s'hit...but top of my list is going through lights that have just turned red: YOU ARE NOT IN A MOTOR PROPELLED VEHICLE. You are going slower than the traffic and the lights for the other side of the junction will have turned green before you pass! IDIOT!

Now, seeing as i drive a scooter I accelerate away quite quickly from what is usually the front of the junction. 3 times out of the last 2 weeks I've almost went straight into a cyclist - there wont be a fourth. I, the bigbiffo, solemnly swear that the next ham-headed, ignorant, inconsiderate f'uckwit on a bicycle who thinks they're going fast enough to beat a red light light will be run down by me - I am braking no more.

Am I right to cause (what should be minor physical injury) to random f'uckwits on bikes (like, get a real mode of transport) just to prove a point? Oh, and I'm calling on all other moped, scooter, motorbike users too...maybe a few knocks off the 2 wheelers at the top of the traffic will spread the word amongst the hippies...

MagicMarker

I hate those fúcking eejits driving scooters, scumbags the lot of them.

Praetorian Saighdiuir

Feel better ****wit?

mgmt

You seem to be a scumbag.

Celly Smunt

i just don't like when they take up half the road

Alanstrainor

Just chill. Life gets easier when you don't get worked up about pointless crap.

Duggy747

Don't run them over, they leave a stubborn stain on the bottom of your car.

Instead drive up beside them, get out a stick and push them over. Much hilarity ensues.

EDIT: Since I don't drive I have a serious problem with cyclists screaming up and down the path barely brushing by me. Just once I'd like to stick my arm out and clothes line the pricks.

seamus

thebigbiffo wrote: »

Oh, and I'm calling on all other moped, scooter, motorbike users to...maybe a few knocks off the 2 wheelers at the top of the traffic will spread the word amongst the hippies...

You're forgetting that your machine weighs 120 kilos. Mine weighs 12. You can try push me at the top of the lights, but if I push back, you're going to fall over and knock over any other motors like a row of dominos

And they'll all blame you because you're just a scooter driver and not a real biker.

Celly Smunt

Duggy747 wrote: »

Don't run them over, they leave a stubborn stain on the bottom of your car.

Instead drive up beside them, get out a stick and push them over. Much hilarity ensues.

giving them a little smack on the arse is better

Sanjuro

thebigbiffo wrote: »

But in general they're the biggest scumbag, inconsiderate road users you're ever likely to come across.

Taxi drivers are using bicycles now?

Wossack

green light means proceed if way is clear - not plough on regardless

thebigbiffo

nah - it's not that i want to cause random injury really - but better get knocked off by me than some s'hithead in an M3 tearing away after the lights go green...

I'm really just a rambling saint - a bit like the littlest hobo...except better looking...

Thatnastyboy

It annoys me to see people who think they are driving a motorbike, when, in fact they are driving a 2 stroke hairdryer with dinky wheels.

Go and buy a real bike. Hippie. :pac:

Maybe you should have a cup of tea and chill the flock out, let them off, cyclists are annoying, but non less than any other type of road user, they're all d!cks. No point saying that one type of road user is more annoying than another, its down to the individual.

Bus drivers are annoying as fk, are you gonna ram them on your bee-in-a-bottle?

:pac:

smokedeels

Jeremy Clarkson (thebigbiffo)

Cookie_Monster

Wossack wrote: »

green light means proceed if way is clear - not plough on regardless

this.

they may well have gone through the junction on orange and just take a bit longer to clear than cars... (or they could be light jumpers).

either way knocking them down will do you no good, nice insurance claim for the cyclist though

Celly Smunt

smokedeels wrote: »

Jeremy Clarkson (thebigbiffo)

will i thank now or later?

Michael 09

Way to generalise that ALL cyclists are ignorant.

You could argue that scooter drivers are the worst of the lot. Not real bikers (because lets face it, your 'machine' is embarrassing) and too lazy to cycle. BUT they tend to be the vehicle most seen in cycle lanes.

To be honest, you sound like the wreckless one on the road who just tears off at lights. You're not the only one on the road.

ballsymchugh

i'll just knock down the next moped driver that comes against me in traffic in my lane just because they don't want to wait in that traffic

steve9859

I'll stop running red lights when scooters and taxi drivers stop speeding up when they see the lights going red instead of slowing down, and stop playing that fun game where they see how many can get across the lights after they have gone red and the green man has appeared

Alkers

Scooters are ghey.
Seriously though, how petty are you, use your handlebars to steer around them next time and stop ruining the internet with your miserable dribbling.

Celly Smunt

Michael 09 wrote: »

You could argue that scooter drivers are the worst of the lot. Not real bikers (because lets face it, your 'machine' is embarrassing)

ah now,you can't wear tights on your bike and expect to call other people an embarrassment.

stovelid

Unfortunately a day is only 24 hours long so therefore not nearly long enough to eradicate every cycliist that smugly flouts traffic laws on a regular basis yet still demands expert driving and meticulous care from the gas-guzzling, seal-raping muderderous bastards in cars.

the groutch

I've had issues with cyclists running red lights, but as a pedestrian, not a motorist. There are certain crossings now where even though I have the green man, I still have to keep looking both ways, make sure one of them doesnt hit into me.

Even worse tho is as Duggy mentioned cyclists on footpaths. Alot of the time it's on the narrower ones, and were expected to jump out of their way.
Imo if you're not prepared to use the road, you shouldnt be on a bike

tbh, until cycling is at least partially regulated, things won't improve in a hurry.

Michael 09

pmcmahon wrote: »

ah now,you can't wear tights on your bike and expect to call other people an embarrassment.

I'll have you know that I have been told that I look lovely in my tights.

dMaN24

No one likes people on pushbikes. End of discussion.

Knasher

Damn right, the next time I see somebody running a red light I'm just going to plough on into them.

Of course unfortunately for me, I'm a cyclist (I always stop at red lights btw) and I usually see at least one car running them per day. So I'm probably not going to survive very long with this attitude.

Celly Smunt

why can't everyone just,shut up arguing,man the fúck up and get a car

Pataman

dMaN24 wrote: »

No one likes people on pushbikes. End of discussion.

I dont know about that, I see a few fit women cycling every day

Korvanica

Duggy747 wrote: »

Don't run them over, they leave a stubborn stain on the bottom of your car.

Instead drive up beside them, get out a stick and push them over. Much hilarity ensues.

EDIT: Since I don't drive I have a serious problem with cyclists screaming up and down the path barely brushing by me. Just once I'd like to stick my arm out and clothes line the pricks.

A fella tried to do that to me once... then had to stop at a red light...

I pulled up beside his passenger side window, and smashed his side mirror off.

Gave him the finger and cycled away...

****

Michael 09

pmcmahon wrote: »

why can't everyone just,shut up arguing,man the fúck up and get a car

I have a car, traffic is nightmare though. Plus cycling in town is fun!

Wossack

Pataman wrote: »

I dont know about that, I see a few fit women cycling every day

+1 on that

most dangerous thing Im finding on the roads these days are hotties in skirts on bikes... sooner or later, they'll have me under a bus I tells ya

kirving

Aren't mopeds limited to 45km/h?

I can got 65kph on my bike, and it's not even a racer.

So then, pushbikes can easily be faster than your "MOTOR PROPELLED VEHICLE".

Hate that!

M Moped with maximum speed of 45 kph and engine size up to 50 cc €85

http://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/travel_and_recreation/motoring_1/driving_tests/motorcycle_driving_tests_in_ireland.html

Pataman

thebigbiffo wrote: »

They all think they're so great with their eco-friendly, health conscious way to get to work. But in general they're the biggest scumbag, inconsiderate road users you're ever likely to come across. Now that it's the time of the year again where it's warm even if it's raining every asshole with a bike scooter decides to 'beat the traffic' of 'get a little more exercise in'.

I drive a scooter real motorbike- i know, equally annoying sometimes - and over the last 3-4 weeks I've seen some scooters do some pretty dangerous and annoying s'hit...but top of my list is going through lights that have just turned red: YOU ARE ON A CORDLESS HAIRDRYER. You are going slower than the traffic and the lights for the other side of the junction will have turned green before you pass! IDIOT!

Now, seeing as i drive a scooter REAL MOTORBIKE I accelerate away quite quickly from what is usually the front of the junction. 3 times out of the last 2 weeks I've almost went straight into a scooter - there wont be a fourth. I, the bigego, solemnly swear that the next ham-headed, ignorant, inconsiderate f'uckwit on a scooter who thinks they're going fast enough get in front of me at the lights will be run down by me - I am braking no more.

Am I right to cause (what should be minor physical injury) to random f'uckwits on scooters (like, get a real mode of transport) just to prove a point? Oh, and I'm calling on all other normal people...maybe a few knocks off the 2 wheelers at the top of the traffic will spread the word amongst the hippies...

....

thebullkf

Cookie_Monster wrote: »

this.

they may well have gone through the junction on orange and just take a bit longer to clear than cars... (or they could be light jumpers).

either way knocking them down will do you no good, nice insurance claim for the cyclist though

depends.

Knasher

Korvanica wrote: »

A fella tried to do that to me once... then had to stop at a red light...

I pulled up beside his passenger side window, and smashed his side mirror off.

Gave him the finger and cycled away...

****

A passenger hit me in the arm once out of the moving car and then had to stop at a red light. Almost caught up with them too, not that I was trying to as it was more of a fright than painful, but they weren't that far from the red light when they did it. As*hole ran the red light (from a stopped position) and nearly knocked over a pedestrian in his haste to escape. Some people just shouldn't be allowed on the road.

Michael 09

From my experience, I wouldn't mess with cyclists. We get pretty pumped up when we're out on the bike so worth keeping that in mind the next time you decide to vent some of your road rage... :P

thebigbiffo

Kevin Irving wrote: »

Aren't mopeds limited to 45km/h?

I can got 65kph on my bike, and it's not even a racer.

So then, pushbikes can easily be faster than your "MOTOR PROPELLED VEHICLE".

Hate that!




http://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/travel_and_recreation/motoring_1/driving_tests/motorcycle_driving_tests_in_ireland.html

wow, you can do 65 on a bicycle! thanks for that lovely piece of gloating poster!

however, i was refering to normal everyday cyclists not a he-man going downhill on €1000, carbon fibre mountainbike.

i bet you're the type of cyclist to which i refer - the 'jumped up git' type.

veryangryman

:eek:

If i didnt consider AH a place for venting and took these things seriously, id never drive again.

Now...my story..

Overtook some gowl who insisted on driving 80kph yesterday. While im overtaking, he stretched his arm out the car window (and no he wasnt hand signalling to turn right) and then flashes at me after i got in front.

On its own im like "fekc him", gave him a salute and drove on. The prick THEN decides to finally find where the accelerator was and FOLLOW ME. :eek:

I was behind another slow moving vehicle who had the good manners to move into the shoulder and let me through. I gave him a quick hazards to say thanks and hopefully gett he message to dingbat behind him that "this is how you do it you gob".

I then figured out that he was definitely following by pulling in (and quickly pulling out) of a petrol station to test the theory. Yep, the weirdo is still up my backside.

Luckily i was going a pretty long journey and he eventually gave up the ghost.

Sometimes i think these people just sit there waiting to make our lives miserable on the road.

seamus

€1000?

Pfft. Wouldn't even get a good wheel for that spare change.

dpe

Saw a brilliant one on Dame Street the other day. Cyclist in all the lycra gear runs through a red light (the Georges street turn) and nearly runs some skanger-looking lad over. The skanger starts shouting "ya effin c*** yeh" etc. and stupidly the cyclist stops to answer back. Before he's even pulled over to the kerb the skanger has run out into the road and decked him. Down goes the cyclist and his bike and the skanger nonchalantly wanders off into Temple Bar. No one bats an eyelid (and the taxi drivers nearby were pissing themselves laughing as the cyclist dragged himself and his bike away).

Michael 09

dpe wrote: »

Saw a brilliant one on Dame Street the other day. Cyclist in all the lycra gear runs through a red light (the Georges street turn) and nearly runs some skanger-looking lad over. The skanger starts shouting "ya effin c*** yeh" etc. and stupidly the cyclist stops to answer back. Before he's even pulled over to the kerb the skanger has run out into the road and decked him. Down goes the cyclist and his bike and the skanger nonchalantly wanders off into Temple Bar. No one bats an eyelid (and the taxi drivers nearby were pissing themselves laughing as the cyclist dragged himself and his bike away).

I'm glad that you can see the funny side of an assault. Well done. :rolleyes:

thebigbiffo

dpe wrote: »

Saw a brilliant one on Dame Street the other day. Cyclist in all the lycra gear runs through a red light (the Georges street turn) and nearly runs some skanger-looking lad over. The skanger starts shouting "ya effin c*** yeh" etc. and stupidly the cyclist stops to answer back. Before he's even pulled over to the kerb the skanger has run out into the road and decked him. Down goes the cyclist and his bike and the skanger nonchalantly wanders off into Temple Bar. No one bats an eyelid (and the taxi drivers nearby were pissing themselves laughing as the cyclist dragged himself and his bike away).

this makes me very happy

Hal1

Cycling fourm that way -->

thebigbiffo

Michael 09 wrote: »

I'm glad that you can see the funny side of an assault. Well done. :rolleyes:

yer man might think twice about putting other road users at risk the next time tho.

i'm sick of cyclists acting like they can do whatever the f'uck they want - as fair as i'm concerned a higher proportion of assholes ride bikes than any other vehicle.

ejmaztec

Scooter.:pac:

AndyGarcia

dpe wrote: »

Saw a brilliant one on Dame Street the other day. Cyclist in all the lycra gear runs through a red light (the Georges street turn) and nearly runs some skanger-looking lad over. The skanger starts shouting "ya effin c*** yeh" etc. and stupidly the cyclist stops to answer back. Before he's even pulled over to the kerb the skanger has run out into the road and decked him. Down goes the cyclist and his bike and the skanger nonchalantly wanders off into Temple Bar. No one bats an eyelid (and the taxi drivers nearby were pissing themselves laughing as the cyclist dragged himself and his bike away).

This has just made me feel all warm and fuzzy, fair play to the skanger

On anotehr note apparently cyclists go through red lights for their own saftey well according to post #223 point 3 http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056258656&page=15

Michael 09

thebigbiffo wrote: »

yer man might think twice about putting other road users at risk the next time tho.

i'm sick of cyclists acting like they can do whatever the f'uck they want - as fair as i'm concerned a higher proportion of assholes ride bikes than any other vehicle.

I'd agree to a certain extent with what you're saying, if you use the road you should obey the rules that go with it, right?

But calling ALL cyclists ignorant is a bit of a stretch. The problem with this new cycle to work scheme is that there's a lot of new cyclists who are a bit clueless on the road. (usually seen around the grand canal every bloody morning)

ejmaztec

thebigbiffo wrote: »

this makes me very happy

Is this yours?

macman2010

Cyclists generally don't bother me, that being said i cannot stand it when you get 2 or even 3 cyclists cycling along side each other having a leisurely chat and taking up the entire road.
Move the f''uck out of the way:mad::mad::mad:

KH25

I don't drive so I've never had problems with cyclists in that respect but as a pedestrian Im absolutely sick of cyclists thinking they have a right to continue through red lights. I realise not everybody does it but I see it happen pretty much everyday.

OP.... Drive through this everyday on the way to work and you won't mind cyclists too much afterwards.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oetF3UTIwbc

I think it's a laugh though.