Rte tonight, parents sure they are communicating with dead child

WalterMitty

http://www.rte.ie/tv/wouldyoubelieve/

Should be interesting!

AhSureTisGrand

Now that saddens me

Ickle Magoo

I heard a radio interview with the father not so long ago - made me feel sorry for them...they are convinced their dead son lives on & is in contact with them, you can't get on with your life when you think that. Sad story.

MagicMarker

Someone needs to buy them some new bulbs.

Avns1s

Perhaps they get comfort from thinking that they are in contact, and if that's the case, it may well help them get on with life and good luck to them.

Zillah

Avns1s wrote: »

Perhaps they get comfort from thinking that they are in contact, and if that's the case, it may well help them get on with life and good luck to them.

Far more likely they are living in some desperate twilight, trapped between delusion and despair.


Much better to accept the loss and learn to live again.

MagicMarker

Oh shít, I just realised my lamp flickers when I turn it on.

I hope doesn't watch me when I masturbate!

Avns1s

Zillah wrote: »

Much better to accept the loss and learn to live again.

Easier said than done, when it's the loss of a child.

WalterMitty

I hope they dont make love in case he is watching.

Zillah

Avns1s wrote: »

Easier said than done, when it's the loss of a child.

I didn't say it was easy. But you were implying it could be a good thing for them, which I seriously doubt. He sounds like he is desperately clutching at straws.

alex73

WalterMitty wrote: »

http://www.rte.ie/tv/wouldyoubelieve/

Should be interesting!

Last month a photo of my Wife's Grandmother fell and broke. My wife only found out 4 days after her death that she had died as her family abroad did not want to worry her about traveling back for the funeral. However the photo did fall the day she died. Coincidence? Draft of wind maybe. Each read the signs as they like.

MagicMarker

alex73 wrote: »

Coincidence?.

Yes.

Zillah

I once had a powerfully real dream that my grandmother died. I woke up sobbing and crying and horribly upset. It was later that day that I heard she was, in fact, still alive. She lived happily for six more years.

If, however, she had died that day or any day within the following few weeks, there are many people who would claim spiritual meaning for it. That's very unlikely though. But there are billions of people on this planet, and on a large enough scale that which is unlikely suddenly becomes very likely.

After all, no one goes around telling tales about when a picture of a person fell off the wall and then nothing special happened.

Zillah

RTE player has it live: http://www.rte.ie/player/#l=8

This is gonna be unpleasant I bet.

EDIT: Fixed link.

"It's not just the grieving mind seeing what it wants to see"...

Suuuuure.... He's so desperately eager. Did I say "unpleasant"? I meant unsufferable. They just tried desperately to make it sound like science is on the verge of proving the after-life.

Galvasean

Based on this quote:
"The minute Craig passed away, I knew that could not be the end, the life, the love, the personality. It was impossible for me to believe that was it."
It sounds like the poor couple are believing what they want to believe. They can't let go. I don't envy them.

liamw

Watching it now... the bulb didn't even blow when he asked for it; it wasn't until the next day it expoded!

CiaranMT

The mother comes across as more skeptical in this.

The father seems to really take solace in these events.

Zillah

Ahahahaha, a priest just declared that the exploding bulbs were caused by the parents' psychic powers. There is, he asserts, merely a 5% chance that it is his dead son.

These fucking people.

Standman

The conversation with this priest is quite surreal. Doesn't sit well at all.

branie

The priest comes across a a bit skeptical at one point

liamw

I feel so bad for Neville to be honest. He's just admitted that he couldn't handle it if his son just ceased to exist. This is just painful.

CiaranMT

The priest was the most skeptical of the lot.

I dont think I could face watching it, but they need to be given help, not put on tv

stevoslice

for a father with a very 'scientific' background, he has very little time for other people's opinions, and downright disagreed with anyone who proposed an alternate explanation. sounds familiar.

Zillah

CiaranMT wrote: »

The priest was the most skeptical of the lot.

I don't think proposing telekinesis counts as sceptical. That show was desperately in need of a sceptic. I would love to see Dawkins or PZ Myers get 30 seconds to express their opinion on the matter. Hell, put me in the ring coach, I'm ready for it.

goat2

we dont know the answers, but i would like to beleive that there is something more than just dying and in dying it being the end, if i lost one of my children,

MagicMarker

goat2 wrote: »

we dont know the answers

We more than likely do.

CiaranMT

goat2 wrote: »

we dont know the answers, but i would like to beleive that there is something more than just dying and in dying it being the end, if i lost one of my children,

Why?

liamw

goat2 wrote: »

we dont know the answers, but i would like to beleive that there is something more than just dying and in dying it being the end, if i lost one of my children,

Yes it may be comforting. Unfortunately, that has no bearing on reality. I'd rather face the hard truth than live a comforting delusion; each to their own.

Standman

branie wrote: »

The priest comes across a a bit skeptical at one point

I think the main reason for the priests "skepticism" was that he takes the existence of an afterlife for granted, as he says "Why do you need this to believe there is an afterlife?". He's keen to label the faulty electonics as "telekenesis" rather than having anything to do with his religious dogma.

Zillah

When I die I'm going to come back to my family and make it very clear to them that I still exist. Y'know, make lights flicker now and then, pop a bulb a day after they ask me to, a strange breeze when the door is open...all those usual and unambiguous signs that an intelligent creature would use to signal its presence.

branie

liamw wrote: »

Yes it may be comforting. Unfortunately, that has no bearing on reality. I'd rather face the hard truth than live a comforting delusion; each to their own.

So you'd find reality comforting, then?

MagicMarker

branie wrote: »

So you'd find reality comforting, then?

Does it matter?

robindch

Zillah wrote: »

make lights flicker now and then, pop a bulb a day after they ask me to, a strange breeze when the door is open

Very retro. I'm going to reappear on some toast and as a damp patch on some concrete on a motorway underpass in Buttsville, Alabama.

liamw

branie wrote: »

So you'd find reality comforting, then?

No.

Mr Porridge

liamw wrote: »

Yes it may be comforting. Unfortunately, that has no bearing on reality. I'd rather face the hard truth than live a comforting delusion; each to their own.

I would rather a comforting delusion. I've always said that I would rather the hard truth but in my heart of hearts I don't mean it. I'm an atheist but wish that I could go back to being a theist. I never was a devout believer but it was there comforting me at the back of my mind.

shamrock55

i only watched a bit as i found it hard to watch to be honest but who are we to say what these people should or shouldnt feel if they get comfort from what they believe then more luck to them i couldnt imagine what these people went through when they lost their little boy

shamrock55

liamw wrote: »

Yes it may be comforting. Unfortunately, that has no bearing on reality. I'd rather face the hard truth than live a comforting delusion; each to their own.

easy to say that now mate but if you have kids and god forbid something happened i doubt very much you would think like that then

OpenYourEyes

thebhoy wrote: »

for a father with a very 'scientific' background, he has very little time for other people's opinions, and downright disagreed with anyone who proposed an alternate explanation. sounds familiar.

What kind of background did he have, just as a matter of interest?

Turtwig

shamrock55 wrote: »

easy to say that now mate but if you have kids and god forbid something happened i doubt very much you would think like that then

You know this is something that I don't understand, at all. If we got into our heads that the idea that feeling comfort from denying reality is not ok, then the thought wouldn't even occur to you in the first place because if it did you'd actually feel guilt and shame. It's amazing that we as an advanced species think it is ok to deny reality just because it conflicts with our comfort zones. Yet if you ask the question why not just dope them up on a drug where they are continually happy? You'll probably get a look of disdain and rightly so, but yet somehow if the delusion is deemed to be not harming them then it's ok. Years ago it was tradition to destroy your life after someone died, the entire family would wear a black armband signalling they were in bereavement and would isolate themselves from greater society for an entire year! It was deemed utterly acceptable and the whole "if it happened to you, then you might want to do the same" was trotted out in its defense. At least we made some progress. Hopefully there will come a day that idea of hallucinating to cope with grief is no longer deemed an appropriate choice.

People struggle after losses of friends and family, it is only natural, but denying the fact that they are truly gone is just prolonging the grief, pain and suffering. I've lost a lot of close friends, I know that I will never see them again and I know that even now writing this makes me feel a heavy lump in my chest, but I also know that they wouldn't want me getting an illusionary sense of happiness or comfort from deluding myself into thinking I was communing with them when I wasn't. They'd want me to live my life, stop being an utter jerk and finish reading that George Orwell book that I promised I'd finish almost 8 years ago now.

Chuck Stone

It's sad for the parents for sure.

But let's just say that that wee lad is 'on the other side' well then he wouldn't be ****ing around with his parents emotions by flicking the bloody lights on and off!

MagicMarker

shamrock55 wrote: »

easy to say that now mate but if you have kids and god forbid something happened i doubt very much you would think like that then

Why? Because you need to believe like that?

I think everyone in this forum has lost a family member to death, yet here we are, not believing we'll meet them in the afterlife.

CiaranMT

OpenYourEyes wrote: »

What kind of background did he have, just as a matter of interest?

Degree in Physics of some sort.

Beruthiel

I have a friend who's hubby recently died 5 months after they got married (age 27). A horrific loss and she is utterly, utterly devastated.
She thinks he's with her all the time. Sending her signs and making her feel his presence. She seems to take comfort from that.
She's very fragile and I cannot/will not say anything to her about what I'm really thinking. It is so very hard to just stand by and watch, but in a case like this, what else can you do?

Delirium

Beruthiel wrote: »

I have a friend who's hubby recently died 5 months after they got married (age 27). A horrific loss and she is utterly, utterly devastated.
She thinks he's with her all the time. Sending her signs and making her feel his presence. She seems to take comfort from that.
She's very fragile and I cannot/will not say anything to her about what I'm really thinking. It is so very hard to just stand by and watch, but in a case like this, what else can you do?

Suggest grief counselling? It does sound like she really needs to talk to someone.

Beruthiel

koth wrote: »

Suggest grief counselling?

Aye. That is something I will indeed be suggesting.

seamus

Mr Porridge wrote: »

I would rather a comforting delusion. I've always said that I would rather the hard truth but in my heart of hearts I don't mean it. I'm an atheist but wish that I could go back to being a theist. I never was a devout believer but it was there comforting me at the back of my mind.

See, for me it just adds an extra layer of uncertainty.

If I were to see flickering lights or whatever and consider that it may be a dead whatever communicating with me, that would no doubt give me comfort, but a seperate part of my brain would doubt it. So not only am I grieving for a loss, but I'm also burdened with this internal conflict and inherent uncertainty about whether or not someone is actually gone.

A bit like breaking up with someone and being told it's over, but receiving ambiguous text messages from them every now and again. You might get a slight bit of joy at the time, but in the long run you will be in even more agony.

At least if you accept the fact that strange happenings are simply coincidence and the person is gone, you can move on.

mewso

I'm far from an expert but I would imagine one of the real dangers of this kind of delusion is that somewhere along the line it may come to an end and the sudden grief then may be very damaging and much harder to deal with as everyone else has moved on.

Helix

Beruthiel wrote: »

I have a friend who's hubby recently died 5 months after they got married (age 27). A horrific loss and she is utterly, utterly devastated.
She thinks he's with her all the time. Sending her signs and making her feel his presence. She seems to take comfort from that.
She's very fragile and I cannot/will not say anything to her about what I'm really thinking. It is so very hard to just stand by and watch, but in a case like this, what else can you do?

im sure her hubby would be off seeing some of the sights and sounds the world has to offer if he had the ability to be on earth post death. i know i would, itd be great

maybe we're looking in the wrong places for ghosts. have we ever considered the major tourist attractions?

vampire of kilmainham

that priest fr pat collins is actually an exorcist appointed by the catholic church so he would be quick to belive in the devil or demons or demonic possession and as far as i know he has carried out a few exorcisims here in Ireland yet he states that there would only be a 5% chance that the spirit of this mans son is causing paranormal phenomana to accour and that this man or his wife are telekenatic so we can all go around blowing bulbs and causing different kinds of paranormal activity if we are so stressed when a love one dies that we ask them to show us a sign that they are there well i can assure you there is a spiritual relm and iv had severel real experiances but i wont go into it all as iv seen the kind of answers given here and yes everyone is entitled to their opinion i dont care what people think iv had the experiances and thats it....

liamw

Did you intentionally avoid punctuation?