pushing a girl in a drunk argument ..

mainstreets

me Boyfriend kept causing big arguments and saying nasty things when he was drunk. i let it go a few times , then one night he pushed my and had me against a wall calling me nasty stuff and smashed his phone. even the gaurds had to come over and calm him down at that point i walked away. when he was sober or when we were out with friends at home he would be the nicest boyfriend in the world this side of him only came out when he was with me on a college night out with my college friends. I found it hard to break up with him but it was the last straw , i had a few insecurities about how he had been texting one of his girl friends from home. so the relationship wasnt working.
Since the incident he apolagised and really regretted pushing me he knew it was really wrong and i accepted that. then some arguments arose from finding it hard being split up. i promised him i wouldnt tell people what he did and i kept that promise. next thing i know , he has told people that i was making up a lie that he pushed me , to cover his own ass and now our group of friends from home thinks that of me and have completely taking his side.
I never did anything wrong and iv no friends left i dont know what to do in this situation

SheRa

Your boyf really is not a nice person to you. He is abusive and then twists things to look good to your friends.

I'm not one to normally suggest that someone dump their boyf but in this case i think that you should. He is nasty.

Now regarding the friends, if they are friends of both of yours I suggest you talk to one of them and say that not only did it happen, but the guards were called. Id also ask them how can he say that you lied about it, when none of them heard the lies, because he made them up.

Do you really want these people as friends if they don't even talk to you for your side of things and automatically take his side.

FortyPlusHubby

mainstreets wrote: »

next thing i know , he has told people that i was making up a lie that he pushed me , to cover his own ass and now our group of friends from home thinks that of me and have completely taking his side.
I never did anything wrong and iv no friends left i dont know what to do in this situation

Leave him alone, don't try to convince anyone of anything. It's only a matter of time before he does this again and then people will know what was going on.

Your friends will come around in time. It's up to you whether or not you want to maintain contact with them, but frankly if people that knew me were so quick to believe stories like that about me without hearing my side, I think I'd realise they were never good friends.

40pH

mainstreets

Your probably right , they arnt good friends atall. Just the only ones from home iv got and now im completely shut out and all because of his wrong doing.

bridal

This guy doesnt sound like a very nice guy, you deserve someone who will treat you well. Please for your sake get out of this abusive relationship

Ickle Magoo

mainstreets wrote: »

me Boyfriend kept causing big arguments and saying nasty things

Okay, I got that far before starting to wonder why you were still with the guy. Relationships are supposed to be fun, our partners are supposed to add to our lives and the love and support they provide give a positive and lifting influence. If your relationship is hard work then I would be having a long hard look at whether its a relationship worth having.

When your boyfriend starts telling friends lies to cover his pushing you, it's time to call it a day - and when your "friends" believe him, it's time to find some new & better friends.

All the best.

LegacyUser

Since the incident he apolagised and really regretted pushing me he knew it was really wrong and i accepted that.

You shouldn't have accepted that. He is an abuser. Abusers dont change. They blame everyone except themselves. He brushed it under thre carpet and made you accept doing the same. He made you complicit to his abuse. This is how they start.

i promised him i wouldnt tell people what he did and i kept that promise

That was a mistake. You covered for him, but the only person that protected was him, not you. He is manipulating you into covering for him. You should NEVER cover for someone who has hurt you. It gives the abuser the message that what he did was ok. You are enabling him.

Please get away from this man. He will hurt you emotionally as well as physically, I wasted years with an abuser. I pitied him. He always blamed me or minimised/justified it. He will not change. Weirdly abusers see themselves as victims and believe you (the victim) are to blame for 'pushing them over the edge' etc.

Get away. At least read 'Why Does He Do That' by Lundy Bancroft.

champie

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I never did anything wrong and iv no friends left i dont know what to do in this situation [/QUOTE]

Thats what bullies and abusive people do they try to isolateyou and twist it so it's your fault and leave you with no 1 else to turn too apart from them.

So I would advise get out of so called relationship now and look at the friends that you have quality not quantity is the way to go he will show his true colours eventually to everyone