Worst time in your life?

Crann na Beatha

This post has been deleted.

Biggins

When I was getting divorced.
One serious depression that took me four years to pull out of.

Links234

That's horrible to hear Veles

*hug*

for me it was the depression I sunk into over a few years, the lowest point being maybe around 2009. denial of gender issues wasn't healthy. I kept sliding into a dark hole, became a shut-in, kept having constant anxiety attacks and just barely left the house at all. I was very alone, isolated, self hating and contemplating suicide. it felt like I was dying inside, I couldn't be happy no matter what I did, and probably would've killed myself sooner or later if something didn't change pronto. it was maybe around november/december 2009 I make a serious effort to change things in my life for the better.

biko

Having to live on the streets of London for one freezing winter week because I didn't have enough money to get home.

rusty_racer94

When I left some country forever after living there for 9 years, that was a horrible experience as a child.

TanG411

Being heavily taunted and ridiculed for quite a while when I was about fifteen.

It still affects me now - I never go out at night, can never trust anybody, very distant from anybody I know.

I'm just greatful I was never beaten by them. Whenever I see them though, my knees turn like jelly. I go red.
I sweat and breathe heavily.
One of them is a next door neighbor.

Worst time? After a friend did something and seeing the effect on his closest friends.
Worst feeling? Bad trip.. Horrifyingly intense. Never again.

cullen5998

..

Mary28

When I renovated my house using a cowboy builder (who had been recommended to me). The job was supposed to take 3 mths and after a year was still not finished. I had to pay my mortgage along with rent elsewhere while the work was being done. In the end I had to employ others to finish it and 8 yrs later still find things he didn't do right and have spent thousands fixing. I spent 1 year ringing him and his horrible family every single day hassling them to finish the job. It was more stressful than my dad becoming ill and dying because I had to be angry and threatening regularly. It took a lot out of me as I am not very confrontational by nature.
That said if that was the worst or more stressful time I'll ever see then I consider myself pretty lucky. I've got children now and they bring a whole new level of stress and worry with them.

pragmatic1

When my father was seriously ill one year and came very close to dying. Heart attack, small stroke and later in the year cancer. Horrible seeing a strong man wasting away.

Pyr0

Smiles and sunshine folks, smiles and sunshine..

Ardennes1944

im 19 and very privileged that i have a good family, 2 jobs, a gf for 3years and am in college. but id still say i am going through a hard enough period in my life mentally. although i have a lot of friends, i would have very few or little close friends. this in my opinion is down to the fact that all the lads i know my age or that i meet seem to be so immature and constantly out to get you and find ways to embarrass you. all they seem to be interested in is getting drunk and going clubbing, talking about bull**** like. its very hard to find someone genuine, especially around my age and the last 2-3 years.

zenno

I don't think there is a person out there that hasn't had a very bad experience in their lives.

mine was from been framed for something i didn't do and sent to mountjoy prison. some of the criminals in there wanted to slice me up and kill me on behalf of a prison officer many years ago. going to sleep every night with three hardened criminals in the same cell was not easy and every day was hell but I decided to attempt suicide by hanging when they were all asleep from their medication it was my only way out. that time still haunts me to this day. it's rare that I am even talking about this but why not as the thread is relevent.

AckwelFoley

2007


..and i aint going through it again. ever

Doublin

Very honest post OP, I know the loss involved in losing people close to you & the turmoil you go through, for me with 2 of them it was what I should've/could've done type stuff that stayed with me for a long while.

Anyway, I'll post something I put in the non-drinkers forum a while back. I went from having a top job, top lifestyle, no bothers to this within a year:

- Lost partner, contact with daughter, job, home, driving license. Shunned by family.
- End up living on the street/hostels.
- On first name terms with the cops in Finglas & Store Street. Invited for many a stopover in their stations.
- On first name terms with nurses/porters/security in the Mater A&E waking up there on numerous occasions.
- Half dozen stints in Psych wards, barred from one.
- Couple of suicide attempts.
- A short stint in the Joy.
- 2 stints in rehab.
- Still dealing with repairing the mental & physical damage I've caused to myself.

But I'm well on the way back now (*no.1 reason was asking someone else for help & talking through things) & this is one of the quotes I live by now:

"I don't measure a man's success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom." - George S. Patton

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

Secondary school.

Sonics2k

Probably my most recent break up, which was late november.

The girl in question is one I'd gone out with for some 3 years about 6 years ago, we separated for a few reasons, but we went our own ways.

I started a family, which was honestly quite miserable. We broke up, had a lot of hassle with the kids, but somehow the first girl and I met up just to catch up, and things just took off. Was the happiest time of my life in years.

But, when my ex threatened to block all access to my children, forced me to go to Court, and was basically given a choice between seeing my children or the woman I loved.

Instead of talking it through with her, I wussed out, panicked and broke up with her. Unsurprisingly, I was still refused access to my children unless I paid excessive amounts of maintenance, but after weeks and weeks of Court, I won access.

To this moment, I'd give anything to have her back, my 4 year old daughter still asks about her everytime I collect them. I can't even work up the courage to try and contact her, despite spending hours each week thinking about it.

/end emo

mondeo

When I was 24 my 21 year old gf for almost 2 years turns around to me and says she is only 19. She was suppose to be a psychology student but turns out she was still in secondary skool. She told me her name was Amy but it turned out it was Amal. Couldnt believe somone could be so ignorant. Someone like her is not of this world! 5 years later and I still feel so abused when I think of her. The best way to describe it is knowing you love someone and then finding out she never Really existed. Make ya sick as I really loved her back then but I'm glad it's over as there was essence of psychopath about her.

Still never mind eh I'm enaged to an honest girl now

Micky Dolenz

Pyr0 wrote: »

Smiles and sunshine folks, smiles and sunshine..

The sun doesn't always shine though and when It doesn't it is good to talk.

coffeelover

2007-Starting secondary school and for many other reasons

Azureus

Worst time in my life was between 12-15. My dad died after a drawn out battle with cancer, nursing him at home was the thing I treasure and regret most at the same time-very difficult experience and forced me to grow up fast.
I didnt take his death well and went off the rails a fair bit-got in with the wrong crowd, drinking, going off for weeks on end with friends etc.

Moved away at 15 and copped on, dealt with a lot of crap and now appreciate everything and everyone a lot more

Hookah

Trying to piece my mind together after a mental breakdown, during a nine month period which consisted of a deep depression.

The universe displayed it's black humour by providing me with a job as a coffinmaker at the time.

Vanbis

My dad wasn't well for years we all knew the end was coming. I finished worked and usually got the train but due to a bridge strike i got the bus instead. I walked up the road that evening, it was late and i saw my brothers car outside the house, i knew he wasn't there for a visit. I remember sitting on a neighbours wall for 5min or more to compose myself and gather my thoughts before walking into the house.

pragmatic1

Hookah wrote: »

Trying to piece my mind together after a mental breakdown, during a nine month period which consisted of a deep depression.

The universe displayed it's black humour by providing me with a job as a coffinmaker at the time.

Sorry Hookah but thats just deliciously dark.

KittyeeTrix

For me it had to be the 3 weeks I had to wait for doctors to determine if my 7 yr old daughter had a tumour in her tibia........:(

It turned out to be a massive bone infection (osteomyelitis) in the end:):):)

Never want to have to go thru that wait again!!!

Hookah

pragmatic1 wrote: »

Sorry Hookah but thats just deliciously dark.

There's nothing like bate'ing the boxes together to while away those suicidal thoughts.

Misty Chaos

For me, it was most of 2002. Everything that could go wrong for me, did. I was a complete disaster with girls, I felt that I was being used by my family and that they disregarded my wants and needs while acted as they pleased , school grades were crap and my class teacher was an uncaring pyschopath and as such, I was pretty miserable.

The lowest point for me though was October of that year, a very black time for me. I was actively talking about hanging myself to people in school. All that I knew is that I needed to do something and fast.

The turning point was when I confronted my parents over their drinking for the first time ( and unlike before, refused to back down this time. ) it was then perhaps that they saw for the first time that I wasn't prepared to take things laying anymore.

It was a great release for me and suddenly a few days later, I realized that life was worth living and my outlook changed dramaicly.

I've had my ups and downs since but the point is I'm still here and doing well for myself. Maybe not what I envisioned a few years ago but I am generally a lot happier and I strive to ensure that dark cloud from 2002 never hangs over me again!

Tipsy McSwagger

The Mayonnaise Jar

When things in your life seem, almost too much to handle,
When 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
And had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly,
He picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar
and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students, if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured
them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively
filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor, as the laughter subsided,
'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things - family,
children, health, Friends, and Favourite passions –
Things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, Your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car.

The sand is everything else --The small stuff.

'If you put the sand into the jar first,' He continued,
'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for the things that are important to you.

So...

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play With your children.
Take time to get medical check-ups.
Take your partner out to dinner.

There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.

'Take care of the golf balls first --
The things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.'

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled.
'I'm glad you asked'.

It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,
there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend

RichieC

I hated my teen years, somehow we ended up hanging around with scrotums you wouldn't want near you... hated them years, my 20's were diamond thought.

galwayrush

Wife being diagonsed with cancer, 11 years later, 8 bouts of the disease beaten and she's doing fantastic.She's my real hero.:cool:

Biggins

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

The sun doesn't always shine though and when It doesn't it is good to talk.

When I suffered from the depths of depression, thats what kept me from crossing a thin borderline of doing something really stupid.

As hard as it is, talk.
Talk to someone, Find someone genuine and let it go.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel - you only haven't been able to see it yet.

hondasam

Pyr0 wrote: »

Smiles and sunshine folks, smiles and sunshine..

The thread is about the worst time in your life, It's hard to smile when inside your heart is breaking.

Aoifey!

When I was 14. I got involved with a boy who had a bad reputation. I thought everyone was being stupid, that my parents just wanted to control me, that everyone was against me, all the usual stupid 14 year old thoughts. The relationship went bad and I needed a way out, I was trapped and didn't know what to do. I tried to break it off but he wouldn't let me.

Eventually I got out, I will never forget the feeling of freedom once he didn't have a hold over me.

Even now there are a lot of rumours, lies and half truths going around that area about me. He twisted everything, made me look in the wrong and told everybody who would listen how much of a slut I was so he wouldn't look like the bad guy. If I go to certain places and see certain people I still get things shouted at me.

But now I have a wonderful boyfriend who would never harm me

candy-gal1

This year really, just hoping things can only get better tbh

UglyBolloxFace

Misty Chaos wrote: »

For me, it was most of 2002. Everything that could go wrong for me, did. I was a complete disaster with girls, I felt that I was being used by my family and that they disregarded my wants and needs while acted as they pleased , school grades were crap and my class teacher was an uncaring pyschopath and as such, I was pretty miserable.

The lowest point for me though was October of that year, a very black time for me. I was actively talking about hanging myself to people in school. All that I knew is that I needed to do something and fast.

The turning point was when I confronted my parents over their drinking for the first time ( and unlike before, refused to back down this time. ) it was then perhaps that they saw for the first time that I wasn't prepared to take things laying anymore.

It was a great release for me and suddenly a few days later, I realized that life was worth living and my outlook changed dramaicly.

I've had my ups and downs since but the point is I'm still here and doing well for myself. Maybe not what I envisioned a few years ago but I am generally a lot happier and I strive to ensure that dark cloud from 2002 never hangs over me again!

A truly inspirational post.

Rds1989

I suppose mine was around 12 when on boxing day my uncle who was like my father to me died, the first time i experienced death of someone close. I used to be so confident then had a total transformation in personality becoming aloof, the bullies picked up on this weakness and basically terrorised me mentally and physically for 3 years. I considered killing myself many times during that period and to this day i have trouble trusting people or getting close to people and im 21 now.

encore1

trynna read the above post with all those fekkin star's...

on a serious note tho - i'm gonna bookmark this page and go through it every time i start feeling sorry for myself over something stupid...

Celly Smunt

French Foreign Legion.

skyhighflyer

pmcmahon wrote: »

French Foreign Legion.

Requesting more on this if (only you're happy to talk about it). I've heard of a few guys who went down that road and none of them ended well.

Bobby42

The worst time of my life was when I was 20 - 24.
After school I didn't get into college and my girlfriend broke up with me. Nearly everyone I knew was in college, having the time of their lives as far as I was concerned.

I was working in a job a I absolutely detested. Some mornings I would wake up and nearly be in tears already. It nearly took be about an hour to get ready for work, I just didn't want to go in.

I was walking around with a lump in my throat and a pain in my chest all day. I had no idea why I was so sad. I would often think about suicide. So I'd talk to people about suicide a lot. I used to bring in up in conversations all the time. I then started seriously thinking about ending my life.

I was working this awful job for about a year and it got to a point where I just couldn't take it anymore. I used to go to A/E all the time complaining about stomach pains. I just couldn't talk about what was going on. In and out of hospital for months, the doctors were just fed up with me, they couldn't find anything wrong with me.

I was walking around without a clue who I was for where I was going. So I thought if I died no one would care. Every single day I think about how I was going to kill myself. I was in absolute hell. I did eventually act on my suicidal thoughts but nothing too serious happened and I was ok.

I went on for another couple of months but then I knew that there was only two ways my life could go. I could either die by suicide or get help. They were the only choices I had.

Luckily I decided to get help. It took a long time to get the right help I needed but I know for a fact it saved my life.

Now I'm in college doing a degree I absolutely love. I absolutely love life, things with family and friends are better than they ever have been. I go for runs, I cook, I do all the small things that make me happy.

The most important thing I learned after all of this is that you are in control of your own happiness, no one else, and the only person you need approval from is you.

Celly Smunt

skyhighflyer wrote: »

Requesting more on this if (only you're happy to talk about it). I've heard of a few guys who went down that road and none of them ended well.

if you like assaults and death threats from friendlies i guess the FFL is the place for you

theboss80

In 2003 my friends were heading to Australia for a year, I had just finished my apprentiship but also lost my job. My Granda had started to go a bit downhill but he came up with the price of my flights and asked me to go and take the oppertunity of working over there. I did and flew out in Ostober. Thigs were great over there and got a good job. Flash forward to St Stephens day that year and I got the phonecall to say my Granda had passed away. Was the worst feeling Ive ever had in my life not to have been there. My Granny begged me to stay in Australia and keep my job and after alot of heavy deliberation I listened to her advice. It was the worst decision of my life not to come home for the funeral.

Tipsy McSwagger

encore1 wrote: »

trynna read the above post with all those fekkin star's...

on a serious note tho - i'm gonna bookmark this page and go through it every time i start feeling sorry for myself over something stupid...

I fixed it.

TeddyTedson

Bobby42 wrote: »

The worst time of my life was when I was 20 - 24.
After school I didn't get into college and my girlfriend broke up with me. Nearly everyone I knew was in college, having the time of their lives as far as I was concerned.

I was working in a job a I absolutely detested. Some mornings I would wake up and nearly be in tears already. It nearly took be about an hour to get ready for work, I just didn't want to go in.

I was walking around with a lump in my throat and a pain in my chest all day. I had no idea why I was so sad. I would often think about suicide. So I'd talk to people about suicide a lot. I used to bring in up in conversations all the time. I then started seriously thinking about ending my life.

I was working this awful job for about a year and it got to a point where I just couldn't take it anymore. I used to go to A/E all the time complaining about stomach pains. I just couldn't talk about what was going on. In and out of hospital for months, the doctors were just fed up with me, they couldn't find anything wrong with me.

I was walking around without a clue who I was for where I was going. So I thought if I died no one would care. Every single day I think about how I was going to kill myself. I was in absolute hell. I did eventually act on my suicidal thoughts but nothing too serious happened and I was ok.

I went on for another couple of months but then I knew that there was only two ways my life could go. I could either die by suicide or get help. They were the only choices I had.

Luckily I decided to get help. It took a long time to get the right help I needed but I know for a fact it saved my life.

Now I'm in college doing a degree I absolutely love. I absolutely love life, things with family and friends are better than they ever have been. I go for runs, I cook, I do all the small things that make me happy.

The most important thing I learned after all of this is that you are in control of your own happiness, no one else, and the only person you need approval from is you.

Good post, interesting stuff! Good to hear.

UglyBolloxFace

Bobby42 wrote: »

The worst time of my life was when I was 20 - 24.
After school I didn't get into college and my girlfriend broke up with me. Nearly everyone I knew was in college, having the time of their lives as far as I was concerned.

I was working in a job a I absolutely detested. Some mornings I would wake up and nearly be in tears already. It nearly took be about an hour to get ready for work, I just didn't want to go in.

I was walking around with a lump in my throat and a pain in my chest all day. I had no idea why I was so sad. I would often think about suicide. So I'd talk to people about suicide a lot. I used to bring in up in conversations all the time. I then started seriously thinking about ending my life.

I was working this awful job for about a year and it got to a point where I just couldn't take it anymore. I used to go to A/E all the time complaining about stomach pains. I just couldn't talk about what was going on. In and out of hospital for months, the doctors were just fed up with me, they couldn't find anything wrong with me.

I was walking around without a clue who I was for where I was going. So I thought if I died no one would care. Every single day I think about how I was going to kill myself. I was in absolute hell. I did eventually act on my suicidal thoughts but nothing too serious happened and I was ok.

I went on for another couple of months but then I knew that there was only two ways my life could go. I could either die by suicide or get help. They were the only choices I had.

Luckily I decided to get help. It took a long time to get the right help I needed but I know for a fact it saved my life.

Now I'm in college doing a degree I absolutely love. I absolutely love life, things with family and friends are better than they ever have been. I go for runs, I cook, I do all the small things that make me happy.

The most important thing I learned after all of this is that you are in control of your own happiness, no one else, and the only person you need approval from is you.

Mods - is there anyway to place a post on the front page as a sticky? If people who were going through the same problems as this poster saw this story I think it would really help them.
(EDIT: If Bobby42 wishes too, obviously)

boobar

2009 fell ill and had surgery several times.

Paycuts and all that malarkey didn't bother me after that. Once all the family are healthy and there's food on the table in a warm house, I'll be smilin.

hondasam

Bobby42 wrote: »

The worst time of my life was when I was 20 - 24.
After school I didn't get into college and my girlfriend broke up with me. Nearly everyone I knew was in college, having the time of their lives as far as I was concerned.

I was working in a job a I absolutely detested. Some mornings I would wake up and nearly be in tears already. It nearly took be about an hour to get ready for work, I just didn't want to go in.

I was walking around with a lump in my throat and a pain in my chest all day. I had no idea why I was so sad. I would often think about suicide. So I'd talk to people about suicide a lot. I used to bring in up in conversations all the time. I then started seriously thinking about ending my life.

I was working this awful job for about a year and it got to a point where I just couldn't take it anymore. I used to go to A/E all the time complaining about stomach pains. I just couldn't talk about what was going on. In and out of hospital for months, the doctors were just fed up with me, they couldn't find anything wrong with me.

I was walking around without a clue who I was for where I was going. So I thought if I died no one would care. Every single day I think about how I was going to kill myself. I was in absolute hell. I did eventually act on my suicidal thoughts but nothing too serious happened and I was ok.

I went on for another couple of months but then I knew that there was only two ways my life could go. I could either die by suicide or get help. They were the only choices I had.

Luckily I decided to get help. It took a long time to get the right help I needed but I know for a fact it saved my life.

Now I'm in college doing a degree I absolutely love. I absolutely love life, things with family and friends are better than they ever have been. I go for runs, I cook, I do all the small things that make me happy.

The most important thing I learned after all of this is that you are in control of your own happiness, no one else, and the only person you need approval from is you.

What an inspiring story, well done on turning your life around. Have you thought about helping others by telling this story.
It would be encouraging for other people in the same situation to see there is help out there and life can get better.
Where there's a will there's a way.

Dudess

zenno wrote: »

I don't think there is a person out there that hasn't had a very bad experience in their lives.

I'm lucky enough not to, apart from the usual heartbreaks and disappointments. But anything could be around the corner...

Doublin wrote: »

"I don't measure a man's success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom." - George S. Patton

Love it - that is my inspiration quote from now on!

Sonics2k wrote: »

Probably my most recent break up, which was late november.

The girl in question is one I'd gone out with for some 3 years about 6 years ago, we separated for a few reasons, but we went our own ways.

I started a family, which was honestly quite miserable. We broke up, had a lot of hassle with the kids, but somehow the first girl and I met up just to catch up, and things just took off. Was the happiest time of my life in years.

But, when my ex threatened to block all access to my children, forced me to go to Court, and was basically given a choice between seeing my children or the woman I loved.

Instead of talking it through with her, I wussed out, panicked and broke up with her. Unsurprisingly, I was still refused access to my children unless I paid excessive amounts of maintenance, but after weeks and weeks of Court, I won access.

To this moment, I'd give anything to have her back, my 4 year old daughter still asks about her everytime I collect them. I can't even work up the courage to try and contact her, despite spending hours each week thinking about it.

That sucks tremendously but it's understandable and right that you'd put your kids before anyone else - a caring partner would grasp that. And you weren't to know how things would turn out. Is there any hope of getting back with her? Because if there is, grab it - why not?

Ardennes1944

I'm really really glad this thread hasn't turned out like a usual AH thread would. Kudos guys

Dudess

In fairness, these threads never really go the way of AH - most folks are all right!

amber2

When my brother died in a car accident just outside our family home, he was a legend. We were all on the scene within minutes before emergency services, guards etc., a sight that will be embedded in my mind until the day i die. Also i was 36 weeks pregnant. From there on in and within a split second life would never be the same again for any of us left behind. He had survived a car accident a few years previous in which his two friends were killed instantly little did he know that the same faith was beheld for him on the same stretch of road. The only reason he survived was because he was thrown 76 feet from the car.

A few weeks after his death I gave birth to my son who i named after my brother the highest tribute i could pay someone i had the privilege of calling my brother.

Anyways interesting thread.