one night stand or more?

LegacyUser

hey,
met a guy at a party last weekend and wondering whether to get in touch after a few things happened...well, he approached me at party, had no idea he was interested till he asked me for a drink after party, then we hung out, went back to his and started fooling around. we both said to each other I like u...I decided not to have sex, he was cool wtih that and we went to sleep. next day we hung out in the morning, again seemed good, met up that evening for the cinema, back to his and here is the clincher...we stayed up chatting wtih friends all night, tried to have sex and he couldnt and seemed quite frustrated by it, I gave him a cuddle and told him it didnt matter.....next day we went our seperate ways with him saying "I will call u"...now whilst he was up for things at night, during the day he was quite cool in terms of physical contact yet seemed keen in terms of convo.

so, I texted him on wed with chit chat about a band he recommended, he answered my questions and seemed friendly, said to enjoy the music,...and that was all....i would really like to see him again, but I really dont want to do all the chasing, I would normally think its a good idea to leave things, I contacted him, surely he could text back and ask me out if he was interested....then again, maybe cos of the failure to launch the final night he might be nervous....
so guys, what should I do? leave things and see if he will text or make the next move? if that happened to u guys, would you be too nervous to get back in touch?

flowerchild

Perhaps he is embarrassed or in the words of the famous book, perhaps 'he is just not that into you'. But either way, I'd leave it up to him at this point.

LegacyUser

well you did reassure him it was ok in regards to the lack of performance from him, and lets be honest it happens every guy from time to time when they've had a bit to drink. i think you should let him make the next move because if he is into he will get back to you and if not theres loads more guys out there

LegacyUser

hey OP,
Yeah I'd say leave it up to him. If he tried to sleep with you and it didn't work I'd say it was nerves. The good news is that he probably was more into you than a ONS but also it is embarrassing and if not given time it'll be on his mind again and could make him worse.
Just let him contact you, you've let him know you're interested so just play it cool.

LegacyUser

thanks guys....just one more thing I didnt mention, I didnt actually tell him it was ok, when he went soft, but I figured the cuddle would tell him that right? I mean, he isnt thinking, god, she probably doesnt want to hear from me again...I know, Im just fishing for an excuse to get in touch,I will have to just wait though....

also, I turned him down when he offered to satisfy me, I told him I would wait till the morning for him.....would that make him think I wasnt interested? no right?.....ok, just checking, I know myself though its better to leave it up to him so I will....arghh dating is annoying!

by the way dddddd, we hadnt really been drinking, one or two beers, so u think it was nerves? I was worried maybe he just wasnt that keen on me....but cheers for the advice, twas probably just tiredness or nerves on his part then I guess....its happened before with guys I was in a relationship with generally down to drink or stress but never on a one night stand so wasnt sure if there might be a lack of attraction

Faith

I cannot see why you need to leave it up to him. It's not like you've even been chasing him. A text about music does not a chase make! I don't see any harm in sending him a casual text asking if he wants to get together sometime. You'll soon know if it was a ONS or something more.

Count Duckula

If you like him and wonder if there might be something more, ask him out. Don't wait for him to do it just because he's the man.

bubblebrain

F*ck it - why not get in contact again and suggest ye meet up?

It sounds to me that you like him so why not bite the bullet? He's obviously stressed and totally embarrassed about his performance so maybe if you ask him out he'll know that you genuinely like him????

IrishEyes19

bubblebrain wrote: »

F*ck it - why not get in contact again and suggest ye meet up?

It sounds to me that you like him so why not bite the bullet? He's obviously stressed and totally embarrassed about his performance so maybe if you ask him out he'll know that you genuinely like him????

exactly, ask him out directly this time and if he refuses or doesnt reply within a few days, you have your answer, OP!!