Anti Social Housemate

looking around

housemate stays in there room-feels like im living alone -what should i do?

CoalBucket

?

amdublin

You can't force someone to talk to you

The only person you can control is yourself.

Just move out

amdublin

Like seriously dude. That you had to ask this question

What age are you op?

Mr. Loverman

In fairness to the OP, I lived with someone who wouldn't leave their room. It made me feel a bit uncomfortable in my home.

Even on a basic level, things like sharing housework becomes a problem.

Invite the person out for a few drinks or dinner. Even if they say no, keep doing it, so they know you don't dislike them and will be more willing to be around you.

looking around

your right, i prob shouldnt have posted - just p1ssed off, dont know any1 the area to live with, just moved here recently - sorry for wasting ur time!

looking around

Mr. Loverman wrote: »

In fairness to the OP, I lived with someone who wouldn't leave their room. It made me feel a bit uncomfortable in my home.

Even on a basic level, things like sharing housework becomes a problem.

Invite the person out for a few drinks or dinner. Even if they say no, keep doing it, so they know you don't dislike them and will be more willing to be around you.

tried that, got a no thanks in response! I give up

messrs

looking around wrote: »

housemate stays in there room-feels like im living alone -what should i do?

have had that experience to. its a difficult situation.

how long are you living there? are you a similar age to the other tenant? have you spoke to them much to find out if you have anything in common?

highgiant1985

looking around wrote: »

tried that, got a no thanks in response! I give up

It could be the person just doesn't like you. Your options are you can either put up with it or move out to be honest.

I've been in a similar situation myself where after a new housemate moved in he started doing weird things e.g. like knocking on my bedroom door at night when hes drunk asking me to come down and drink with him, asking if I could get him some weed etc... and once you get off to a bad start with someone its very difficult to recover.

Victor

looking around wrote: »

housemate stays in there room-feels like im living alone -what should i do?

Thats not anti-social, thats more asocial or unsocial.

The normal usage of anti-social would be if they were trashing the place, doing drugs, late night noise, etc.

Jaysoose

It could be worse...the housemate could be the typical..messy/food stealing/money borrowing from/non bill paying/clingy/remote control hogging...type...

filmbuffboy

better the devil you know.

would you rather a shy and introverted housemate or a housemate that never pays their bills, plays loud music at night, is disgustingly dirty etc etc. ?

ElectraX

looking around wrote: »

tried that, got a no thanks in response! I give up

Unfortunately it's the look of the draw with a house share. On the upside I would prefer sharing with someone who kept to themselves than an intrusive housemate who was in your face all the time, noisy,messy etc.
I understand it's frustrating for you as you don't yet know people in the area you live in, but you do have to respect peoples space when you live with them, and if they choose just to stay in their room all the time, so be it.
Don't take it as a personal insult;)

filmbuffboy

that easyroomate site is class. wish i knew about it ages ago :rolleyes: would have save me a lot of hassle living with people im not compatible with at all!!! :rolleyes:

Lawrence1895

I just wonder, why you call your house mate 'antisocial'. It could be much worse indeed, like being noisy, smelly, steeling your stuff or things like that.

chillywilly

It just sounds like the person likes to keep to themselves. What is it that bugs you? Is it you think he/she is a weirdo? Because you want to be friends with him/her?

looking around

ElectraX wrote: »

Unfortunately it's the look of the draw with a house share. On the upside I would prefer sharing with someone who kept to themselves than an intrusive housemate who was in your face all the time, noisy,messy etc.
I understand it's frustrating for you as you don't yet know people in the area you live in, but you do have to respect peoples space when you live with them, and if they choose just to stay in their room all the time, so be it.
Don't take it as a personal insult;)

You are all right, it could be worse - I will just have to try and get to know more people in the area, get out of the house in the evenings so the days sont seem as long! Thanks all!

newmug

What about the other thread where the OP's housemate was eating rotten eggs and drinking sour milk - Now THATS weird

jamesbrond

looking around wrote: »

your right, i prob shouldnt have posted - just p1ssed off, dont know any1 the area to live with, just moved here recently - sorry for wasting ur time!

I used to live in a house and I heard from a workmate that the other guy in the house was complaining that I didnt leave my room. He told them that he thought I might be depressed or something. To tell the truth, the guy used to be so annoying. He kept knocking on my bedroom door and asking me to go for a pint with him. It got to the stage that I used to just not answer him knocking on the bedroom door. Id be out most of the time and hed think I was in the room. He was a weirdo, yet he went around telling everyone I was the weirdo.
I got out of their as fast as I could.

eest

Reminded me this one http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZN5PoW7_kdA

This is an advantage of renting or sharing, you can find another place (probably cheaper and better) if your do not like you house mate(s) or neighbour(s).

I've never understood how keeping to yourself is considered antisocial. I'm one of those people who when living with people I don't know will generally keep to myself and spent more time in my room than sat in the front room with housemates watchign TV and drinking. In one of the last houses I lived I became good friends with the lads I was living with and most nights we would be wtchign crap films or playing PS3 together, but when they moved on come summer a rather odd lad moved it. He was over here while his family were in Eastern Europe, he wasn't a bad sort jsut an extremely odd one who took over the living room one day and began to eat, sleep and change in there, pretty much turned it into his bedroom. I really didnt mind as long as he was quite, was never intimidating or abusive and paid his bills on time then I was happy.

Dublin_Gunner

Victor wrote: »

Thats not anti-social, thats more asocial or unsocial.

The normal usage of anti-social would be if they were trashing the place, doing drugs, late night noise, etc.

I've always found doing drugs to be very social s'pose it depends on the drug...

However, having a house mate whose such a recluse, is deffo a sign on imminent homocide.

Get out. Quick. Tonight if possible (but before it gets too dark...)

Philsopher

filmbuffboy wrote: »

that easyroomate site is class. wish i knew about it ages ago :rolleyes: would have save me a lot of hassle living with people im not compatible with at all!!! :rolleyes:

What site is that?

filmbuffboy

Philsopher wrote: »

What site is that?

ie.easyroomate.com

Philsopher

filmbuffboy wrote: »

ie.easyroomate.com

Thanks for that! Much appreciated.