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water off a ducks back

  • 12-03-2011 3:36am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I am pretty thick skinned compared to the rest of my family. im 26 and I am happy ive a wonderful partner im with 7 years and who im marrying next year and i consider myself very lucky

    But my family this week have called me "Unemotional and cold"

    Basically long story short my 19 year old sis has a son from a druggie. This guy beat her up twice during their relationship and she broke up with him the 2nd time, but got bk with him when she found out she was expecting but his fists got handy again so she broke it off and had James 6 months ago. Hes such a gorgeous little boy- so smiley and the head of my father.

    Problem is he is being christned next month and his dad has demanded none of our family go, and my sister has agreed to this. His reasoning is "He doesnt want people there who will look down on him" (he beat my sis when pregnant and he expects not to be looked down on)

    anyway like i said shes agreed to this- only her, him ,his parents,my parents and the godparents are going to the church. and the rest of my family are going nuts! Theres been so many fights over this, and TBH i dont care either way. It doesnt bother me that im not invited to the christning, but its freaking the rest of the family out. They call me "cold" and say "im souless" but i really dont care, im not going to fight over an event im not wanted at. I know i was there when he beat her the last time and i fought him when he tried to attack her (and got a black eye in the process) but if im not wanted at this event ill accept it.

    But the rest of the family are fighting it tooth and nail but im seen as a bitch because im not bothered


Comments

  • #2
    Chinafoot
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,894 ✭✭✭Chinafoot


    The rest of your family need to focus their anger at the person who deserves it, and that is your sister. She actually agreed to the completely unreasonable demands of a man who she is no longer with due to physical abuse, once while she was pregnant?? She needs to cop on to herself tbh.

    OP, ignore them. If they want to have a go at you for accepting her decision (ridiculous and all as it is) then let them. There's not much you can do about it. They are upset, quite rightly, but its not down to you. Getting on with things doesn't make you cold or unemotional and they are being unfair to you.

    If it were me and they started that crap I'd simply ask what they think ranting about the situation to you is going to achieve and then tell them to go and speak to the girl who has made the decision.

    I wouldn't stress about it. You know you're not cold or unemotional. You wouldn't have posted here if you were.


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