Where's the strangest place you've farted?

this is arse

for me inside newgrange while we waited for the sun to rise

Fluorescence

One time, I farted out my mouth*. True story.







*It may have been a belch

Alter-Ego

On the set of Blue Lagoon.

BBDBB

In front of a room of a dozen delegates on a course I was running

Id been on the beer the night before

stood dead centre of the room, had their attention, there was a pause in the conversation and in the silence I let go a massive one, really noisy and clearly mine:o

epgc3fyqirnbsx

In the queue for the elevators at the Empire State Building. It also happened to be the worse I've ever made

galwayrush

Parker Early Signpost wrote: »

In the queue for the elevators at the Empire State Building. It also happened to be the worse I've ever made

I managed it in an elevator, on the non stop way to the 110th floor of the Toronto space needle.:D

Praetorian Saighdiuir

Whilst ejaculating inside a member of the opposite sex during consensual intercourse.

There were bum bubbles!

Blondini

in a coffin

Praetorian Saighdiuir

Blondini wrote: »

in a coffin

galwayrush

benwavner wrote: »

Whilst ejaculating inside a member of the opposite sex during consensual intercourse.

There were bum bubbles!

Apparently that happens when she yanks the love beads out.....:pac:

newmug

benwavner wrote: »

Whilst ejaculating inside a member of the opposite sex during consensual intercourse.

There were bum bubbles!

From you or her

Bobjims

During the Leaving Cert Irish oral. Covered up skillfully by moving in my chair and coughing. Hope it wasn't picked up on the recorder!

Sergeant

I was at a trade conference and let an absolute stinker go in close proximity to former Minister for Communications, Energy and Natural Resources Eamon Ryan . It wasn't a political protest, it was accidental.

Blondini

Bobjims wrote: »

During the Leaving Cert Irish oral. Covered up skillfully by moving in my chair and coughing. Hope it wasn't picked up on the recorder!

It was

Red Hand

Parker Early Signpost wrote: »

In the queue for the elevators at the Empire State Building. It also happened to be the worse I've ever made

I remember you!:mad:

Hmmmm...there has been a case where I did leave out one of those high pitched vibratory ones while sitting on a chair. The noise travelled down the chair to the floor and I hope to God that my housemate in the kitchen below stairs didn't hear it.

Praetorian Saighdiuir

newmug wrote: »

From you or her

Moi.

...and a bit of leakage. :eek:

bonerm

Sergeant wrote: »

I was at a trade conference and let an absolute stinker go in close proximity to former Minister for Communications, Energy and Natural Resources Eamon Ryan . It wasn't a political protest, it was accidental.

Right in his face I hope?

FunnyStuff

Sitting in the captains cheer of the USS Intrepid....... power fart.

W.Shakes-Beer

Let go an absolute tear jerker during my driving test 3 years ago. I still passed

newmug

Jeremiah 16:1 wrote: »

I remember you!:mad:

Hmmmm...there has been a case where I did leave out one of those high pitched vibratory ones while sitting on a chair. The noise travelled down the chair to the floor and I hope to God that my housemate in the kitchen below stairs didn't hear it.

Why oh why oh why would you care?

punchdrunk

W.Shakes-Beer wrote: »

Let go an absolute tear jerker during my driving test 3 years ago. I still passed

technically you passed twice.

Fago!

Cork

montane

Sergeant wrote: »

I was at a trade conference and let an absolute stinker go in close proximity to former Minister for Communications, Energy and Natural Resources Eamon Ryan . It wasn't a political protest, it was accidental.

Ryan's conferences are a load of hot air.

punchdrunk

for me in a Recording studio while recording a guitar part,strangely your farts have a different tone if heard from outside yourself

Red Hand

newmug wrote: »

Why oh why oh why would you care?

I try not to use chairs as the flatulance equivalent of a lightening rod.

amacca

bonerm wrote: »

Right in his face I hope?

bet he would still be wearing that seemingly permanently fixed foolish clown grin of his.

michael999999

I remember one evening i was on a date with a gorgeous woman i had been chasing for years, we were eating our desserts in the restaurant, everything was going brilliant, when i bought a ticket for the fart lottery and lost!!

Blondini

benwavner wrote: »

Whilst ejaculating inside a member of the opposite sex during consensual intercourse.

There were bum bubbles!

Hey you did the sex! Woooo Hoooo! High virtual Five!!!

(pity your story don't make sense)

Praetorian Saighdiuir

Blondini wrote: »

Hey you did the sex! Woooo Hoooo! High virtual Five!!!

(pity your story don't make sense)

What part does not make sense?

toxicity234

submarrine
it smell for days

gamgsam

My friend let a ripper out in his leaving cert German aural exam. He just sat there and stared at her, then carried in talking. Didn't even crack a smile till he got out

Also a group of us used to fart in each others pints as a prank. Cue a big wake of one of the lads mothers. Anything I say from here will be self incriminating.

Fluorescence

benwavner wrote: »

Whilst ejaculating inside a member of the opposite sex during consensual intercourse.

There were bum bubbles!

Anyone else think of this?

LETHAL LADY

Sergeant wrote: »

I was at a trade conference and let an absolute stinker go in close proximity to former Minister for Communications, Energy and Natural Resources Eamon Ryan . It wasn't a political protest, it was accidental.

Is your first name Trevor by any chance.

Fago!

fluorescence wrote: »

Anyone else think of this?

I thought of this

bonerm

toxicity234 wrote: »

submarrine
it smell for days

Das Toot.

Ditch

In the bath. While I had my whole head and face submerged. Quietly contemplating.

It was fucking Vile! I could somehow hear, smell and taste it, all at once!

Been a committed, 'Showers Only' man for the last forty years since

Waterfordlass

After a crap day at work, I come to AH for some culture and intellectual discussion...you folk are the freaking best.

LETHAL LADY

I have a friend whose speciality is to catch their pipette in their hand and then shove it in your face.

IamtheWalrus

Kneeling at the alter serving mass during a quite spot.

Also, I was at work in a very small 4 person office. I'd been on the beer the night before and was letting silent ones. My supervisor got up to leave for lunch and said she'd return with spray because of the foul smell, suspecting something had gone off in the fridge. It was me!I had filled the office with my smell. To cover myself, I curiously looked into my little paper bin pretending to be looking for rotten food.

FesterBeatty

In my cacks

Praetorian Saighdiuir

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

I have a friend whose speciality is to catch their pipet in their hand and then shove it in your face.

Holy santa claus shit!

marty2002

Whilst doing a first aid course as i knelt down to give the dummy mouth to mouth in front of about 25 people, what makes it even worse was that the smell was so bad they took a 10 min break from the course while the room was aired with windows wide open. I was mortified.

LETHAL LADY

marty2002 wrote: »

Whilst doing a first aid course as i knelt down to give the dummy mouth to mouth in front of about 25 people, what makes it even worse was that the smell was so bad they took a 10 min break from the course while the room was aired with windows wide open. I was mortified.

Did it bring the dummy to life.

t0mm13b

this is arse wrote: »

for me inside newgrange while we waited for the sun to rise

Typical of the OP.... :rolleyes:

Sergeant wrote: »

I was at a trade conference and let an absolute stinker go in close proximity to former Minister for Communications, Energy and Natural Resources Eamon Ryan . It wasn't a political protest, it was accidental.

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

Is your first name Trevor by any chance.

Dang... Lethal Lady ya beat me to it... :pac: was going to say did you Mr. Trevor Sergeant give the greens "the run for their money..." :P

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

Did it bring the dummy to life.

Doubt it would ... would be classified "Silent But Deadly"

:pac:

Standard Toaster

At a funeral while giving my respects to the open casket-ed body.....


ppppppaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrppppppppppppppppppppppp

major bill

I was working in the smallest office ever one day while some wannabe middle class woman was talking on the phone. I accidently let one slip but i thought i got away with it as it was a silent fart but oh no....we all know how deadly the silent ones can be and this was deadly....just as the smell lingered the womans face curled up into a ball like someone pepper sprayed her she then stopped her conversation on the phone to ask did i fart then began telling the other girl on the other end of the phone that i farted:o I had to work in that tiny room with her for another 2 hours til i finished what i was doing. so embarrashing but i pissed meself laughing on the way home!!!!.

t0mm13b

Monkeh wrote: »

At a funeral while giving my respects to the open casket-ed body.....


ppppppaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrppppppppppppppppppppppp

shame on you, no respect for the deceased.... :P

But then again teh deceased wouldn't give a aon-focail-eile about it ... :pac:

then again it would've killed the deceased if it was a deadly 'un :pac:

questionmark?

First time I meet the other halfs parents everything going well drink flowing and then pppppppppppfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrtttttttttttttt. I know everyone heard it but no one said anything and just carried on talking!

newmug

major bill wrote: »

I was working in the smallest office ever one day while some wannabe middle class woman was talking on the phone. I accidently let one slip but i thought i got away with it as it was a silent fart but oh no....we all know how deadly the silent ones can be and this was deadly....just as the smell lingered the womans face curled up into a ball like someone pepper sprayed her she then stopped her conversation on the phone to ask did i fart then began telling the other girl on the other end of the phone that i farted:o I had to work in that tiny room with her for another 2 hours til i finished what i was doing. so embarrashing but i pissed meself laughing on the way home!!!!.

Haha, that just reminded me!

I was at a nightclub one night. These two stuck-up young wans who thought they were way hotter than they were, were standing near me. You know the type. Anyway, they were whispering and looking at me slyly, and I heard one of them sneering something about me, then they both laughed evilly. I walked straight over, cocked my left leg, and blew a half-ton of sh1t gas their way. The look on their faces:D Stupid rich-$luts.

the_syco

Nothing better than the morning after a lot of beer, in a sardine packed train, letting one rip. Heck, I had my music on, and I still could hear it. The smell was horrible. You know the way you like the smell of your own farts? This one was horrible.

In the half hour on the train, I had to have let at least two noisy ones out, and maybe a silent one. Poor fúckers around me couldn't move :pac:

Moral of the story: cider, chips, a run to the train = misfortune for everyone else. Oh, and yes, it was a nice hot day, in the section with no windows.

t0mm13b

the_syco wrote: »

Nothing better than the morning after a lot of beer, in a sardine packed train, letting one rip. Heck, I had my music on, and I still could hear it. The smell was horrible. You know the way you like the smell of your own farts? This one was horrible.

In the half hour on the train, I had to have let at least two noisy ones out, and maybe a silent one. Poor fúckers around me couldn't move :pac:

Moral of the story: cider, chips, a run to the train = misfortune for everyone else. Oh, and yes, it was a nice hot day, in the section with no windows.

Ahh well, you certainly helped the "We go further to get you there" bit... :pac: