Church Wedding

Cadyboo

Have something on my mind and was wondering if anyone has any views on it.
So I am hoping to get married in the next 2years. I dont know if I want a church wedding, I think a civil ceremony is just as nice and as I dont attend mass very often, so I dont know what I will do.
Anyway a poster wrote before that they dont want to get married in church as you say that,' you will rear your children to the catholic church' (or something along those lines).
Now here is my query, if you dont get married in a church, could priests in your parish be funny about your children getting baptised making communion etc.?

MyKeyG

Cadyboo wrote: »

Have something on my mind and was wondering if anyone has any views on it.
So I am hoping to get married in the next 2years. I dont know if I want a church wedding, I think a civil ceremony is just as nice and as I dont attend mass very often, so I dont know what I will do.
Anyway a poster wrote before that they dont want to get married in church as you say that,' you will rear your children to the catholic church' (or something along those lines).
Now here is my query, if you dont get married in a church, could priests in your parish be funny about your children getting baptised making communion etc.?

I don't think it's set in stone, a priest can refuse a blessing for any reason he wants but they tend not to these days. I mean you never hear about unmarried parents kids not being allowed to make their communion. Three of my cousins weren't even married when they got their kids Christened so I'm sure it won't be a big deal. There again I live in a big town so maybe some of the smaller country parishes might be fussy.

phormium

Not being holy holy here but if you dont intend rearing your children catholic then why will it matter, as presumably they wont be making communion and confirmation etc.

As for priests, best to check, have been to a wedding where the priest refused the bridesmaid communion on the day because she was living with her bf and had 2 kids and wasnt married. He approached her later in the day and offered to arrange marriage for them, she fairly told him where to go.

smelltheglove

phormium wrote: »

As for priests, best to check, have been to a wedding where the priest refused the bridesmaid communion on the day because she was living with her bf and had 2 kids and wasnt married. He approached her later in the day and offered to arrange marriage for them, she fairly told him where to go.

:eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:

Never heard anything like that before and sure Ive been to tonnes of weddings!

I was a single mammy on my first, young, and there was no issue with baptism, no questions asked. The second was christened maybe a year before we got married, again no questions. Plenty of kids in my little girls class this year making their communion and their parents arent married.

BeardySi

phormium wrote: »

...have been to a wedding where the priest refused the bridesmaid communion on the day because she was living with her bf and had 2 kids and wasnt married. He approached her later in the day and offered to arrange marriage for them, she fairly told him where to go.

Must have been a fifties themed wedding!

Cadyboo

phormium wrote: »

Not being holy holy here but if you dont intend rearing your children catholic then why will it matter, as presumably they wont be making communion and confirmation etc.

As for priests, best to check, have been to a wedding where the priest refused the bridesmaid communion on the day because she was living with her bf and had 2 kids and wasnt married. He approached her later in the day and offered to arrange marriage for them, she fairly told him where to go.

I never said I didnt intend to rear my children as Catholics. I think that children need something, and when they are older can decide for themselves. Would have my child having to leave a classroom while religion is going on.
I know that priests baptise children when the parents arent married, but Im thinking will they feel because we got married, but snubbed the church that they could make things awkward.

MyKeyG

Cadyboo wrote: »

I never said I didnt intend to rear my children as Catholics. I think that children need something, and when they are older can decide for themselves. Would have my child having to leave a classroom while religion is going on.
I know that priests baptise children when the parents arent married, but Im thinking will they feel because we got married, but snubbed the church that they could make things awkward.

I think there are so many couples getting married these days that for the sake of planning and convenience they can't all get married in a church anyway.

If you intend to go ahead with the civil ceremony then what have you got to lose in asking your Priest? If he refuses to recognise your childrens religious rights because of your choices then maybe he's doing you all a favour.

newbride11

I would never have been one to go for a church wedding but my niece passed away a few years ago & I plan on getting married in the church her funeral was held in. It makes me feel like I'm including her in the day even though she won't be there in person. She's buried in the graveyard next to the church so I can visit her on the day which will be upsetting but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Also my fiances mother is religious & I have a huge amount of respect for her so I wouldn't go for a civil ceremony in case it upset her.

And hopefully when we have children I'll be looking to have them christened in the same church.