job problem

LegacyUser

Sorry for interrupting your thread but i really need some advice, I too am in a job that i hate and the management are just woeful, i get blamed for everything even when you would think there is no possible way I could be blamed for something I am. To try and talk to someone there about it would just be impossible, it is actually shocking and I just do not know how to deal with it. What it seems to boil down to though is the managers fear for her job. Going into work is an absolute nightmare. I really want to find another job but i don't have enough admin experience to find anything decent. I just hate going into work everyday and feel like crying so much while i am there. I am also worried that it is going to destroy my chances of getting another job as they will probably give me a bad reference, other staff members have noticed as well so I am not just imagining it. I just feel so miserable about it and it is ruining my confidence.
I have a degree and am trying to decide what post grad to do now as I don't have a definite qualification, which is what i need. However I find myself being very indecisive as I have this nagging fear I will be in debt and still unable to find proper work.
Thanks for reading, sorry again for interrupting this thread OP

Ickle Magoo

Given you your own thread so the replies on the other thread are only relevant to the person that started it. :cool:

missrandomer

hi,

really feel for you! ive been in similar situation, and if im honest still in it, however its my boss.

my advise to you would be that you back up everything that you are asked to do, i.e with emails to and from you, if an issue comes up that something wasnt done lets say then you can simily just show management "hang on, i wasnt told to do it and knew nothing about it" and you have emails to back this up then.

I know it probably depends on what your being blamed on, and i cant really tell from your post what they can get at you about.

But thats a form of bullying in the workplace, and although you may not want to do anything about it, your manager should know that your not a pushover and that are well wise to it, and maby it would be in his/her best interest to work with you instead of against you. Could be better for both of you's.

Little tip: Step out side, take a deep breath and let drama stay in work. this is not your fault and you shouldnt take it home with you. Go and finish your career choice, but a decision needs to be made in my opinion, Life is way to short for that, and considering your spending half of your day in work whats the point in being miserable.
Cheer up x wipe the tears and smile

bon ami

Hi,

I have worked for many years in different roles both administration and management. In all those years all I ever hear is the management are crap! I could do that better etc etc. Have seen many cases of alleged bullying i.e. being asked to do what you are paid to do.

You say you don't have enough experience to get another job and you don't have a definite qualification yet you can make a judgement about bad management

If you feel you have a genuine complaint then enter into a grievance procedure. Details of this should be in your contract of employment. If you don't have a contract of employment your employer is in breach of the law.

Kimia

bon ami wrote: »

Hi,

I have worked for many years in different roles both administration and management. In all those years all I ever hear is the management are crap! I could do that better etc etc. Have seen many cases of alleged bullying i.e. being asked to do what you are paid to do.

You say you don't have enough experience to get another job and you don't have a definite qualification yet you can make a judgement about bad management

If you feel you have a genuine complaint then enter into a grievance procedure. Details of this should be in your contract of employment. If you don't have a contract of employment your employer is in breach of the law.

Excuse me? This post made me very angry. How dare you say that 'alleged bullying' is 'being asked to do what you are paid to do'. Have you ever been bullied? How insensitive and frankly stupid of you to say such a thing, when clearly you have no idea what you are talking about.

You say that the OP doesn't have enough experience or a decent qualification (she has a degree btw) to make a judgement about bad management? Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realise you needed a PHD to experience a bad manager. Really, what a stupid thing to say and you are adding nothing to the thread, only making the OP feel bad (or trying to for some reason), why would you do that?

OP, take no notice of the above post. Ridiculous. I have too been in your position and I think people who have not experienced it have no idea how awful it is. It leaves a very deep wound in your self-esteem and sometimes the repercussions take years to get over. It's very very damaging and not at all healthy for your mental health.

My advice, you are being trodden on and this is eroding your self-confidence. The only reason you believe you can't get another job is because of this. I'm not saying to leave straight away with nothing to walk into but have a look around and don't let this horrible job change your mind about yourself. Remember, it's not who you are, it's only a job so try and keep strong. And look for another job immediately. xx

bon ami

I dare to say alleged bullying because until an allegation is investigated and proven it is alleged. This is called natural justice , because someone makes an allegation does not make it proven. I have seen and investigated many bullying allegations in the past and many of them were people being asked to do their job correctly who perceived they were being bullied. In a number of cases which were genuine I took the appropriate action whcih in one or two cases led to dismissal.

I am so sorry for having a different opinion to you this does make me "insensitive and stupid of course. Of course I have no idea what I am talking about your 100% right.

The OP said that they had little or no experience or "definitive" qualification. I repeated this. I did not say decent qualification.

At no stage did I say that one needed a PHD to experience a bad manager. But you do need a balanced view and not take everything that one party says as being gospel. I did not realise that when one posted on boards.ie one had to agree with everything the OP said . My apologies I will do so in future



If you read my full post properly you would see that at the end of my post I gave the OP some advice- use the grievance procedure if they have a real grievance.

I would suggest you read posts correctly and not as you wish to see them



The OP said in their post

Kimia wrote: »

Excuse me? This post made me very angry. How dare you say that 'alleged bullying' is 'being asked to do what you are paid to do'. Have you ever been bullied? How insensitive and frankly stupid of you to say such a thing, when clearly you have no idea what you are talking about.

You say that the OP doesn't have enough experience or a decent qualification (she has a degree btw) to make a judgement about bad management? Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realise you needed a PHD to experience a bad manager. Really, what a stupid thing to say and you are adding nothing to the thread, only making the OP feel bad (or trying to for some reason), why would you do that?

OP, take no notice of the above post. Ridiculous. I have too been in your position and I think people who have not experienced it have no idea how awful it is. It leaves a very deep wound in your self-esteem and sometimes the repercussions take years to get over. It's very very damaging and not at all healthy for your mental health.

My advice, you are being trodden on and this is eroding your self-confidence. The only reason you believe you can't get another job is because of this. I'm not saying to leave straight away with nothing to walk into but have a look around and don't let this horrible job change your mind about yourself. Remember, it's not who you are, it's only a job so try and keep strong. And look for another job immediately. xx

Ickle Magoo

Please keep replies on topic and helpful to the OP.

Be aware that off-topic and unhelpful posting can earn you a ban from this forum.

Please take the time to read the forum rules in the charter and abide by them.

Many thanks.
Ickle

Meteoric

bon ami wrote: »

Hi,

I have worked for many years in different roles both administration and management. In all those years all I ever hear is the management are crap! I could do that better etc etc. Have seen many cases of alleged bullying i.e. being asked to do what you are paid to do.

You say you don't have enough experience to get another job and you don't have a definite qualification yet you can make a judgement about bad management

If you feel you have a genuine complaint then enter into a grievance procedure. Details of this should be in your contract of employment. If you don't have a contract of employment your employer is in breach of the law.

That is your experience and from what you say you are a good administrator/manager. However that is not always the case, I know of people who were being bullied by managers and because it was their first job or whatever were not confident enough to go to HR and then when they did it turned out that the bully was reporting alleged incidences of the employee not doing their job on an on-going basis, given the length of time the employee did not have details. They were covering up ahead of time for example giving a target and when when the employee was trying to meet it introducing lots of allegedly "small" other things that needed to be done so in getting these other things done the main target could not be reached.
Anyone confident or used of this sort of office politics keeps proof and can produce it for HR if required, but in your first job? When you don't know people will try do this to you? That if they can they will pass the blame fo their own faults onto anyone they can? When you've been there long enough to need to explain a gap in your CV but suddenly notice because of negative things said about you you will not get a good reference? It's a bullies paradise, experienced management bullies know how to use HR against the person they are bullying.

OP, you have others who have noticed this bullying, though it may well be hard to get them to admit it in a formal setting, so you need to keep a record so you can refute any allegations. Get a Diary and daily record X said this, X requested this, Y was there so you have a record of what is happening and how it impacts on your other work. Then if it all gets too much go to citizens advice or someone similar and see what they think as an impartial observer.
On the plus side if you have this sort of proof, dates and times, e-mails etc, HR will be on your side but it is hard when the other person knows how to play the system and you don't. Even if management is woeful they will find it hard to ignore your written evidence.