false allegations

mammy2be

Hi all,

I really hope someone can put my mind at ease. I'm probably worrying over nothing but I'm 5 months pregnant and its stressed me out alot.

Partner received an email tonight from his ex. The email said that their eldest child told her that I had slapped him. The child is special needs and she is very manipulative and has put words in his mouth many times before but this is alot more serious. I have done nothing but treated the child with love and devotion (i trained and worked as a special needs assistant). I'm heartbroken, she has tried to caused trouble for us for the last three years non stop but i never thought she would stoop this low, i would NEVER raise a hand to any child. I have a great relationship with the child and would do anything for him and my partner.

I'm so terrified now of whats coming next. She has gotten the child to say before things like "daddy dosen't love me" etc.... but I can't exactly sue her for defamtion or anything because she is getting the child to say it.

I can't take any more of her attempt to ruin our lives, i think this is the backlash of finding out we are expecting a child together. Where do I stand with all this? All the most horrible things are going through my head, like what if she goes to social services and they believe her? What if my partner is stopped seeing his child? ( she has been trying to make this happen since day one, making it as difficult as possible) Will it affect my baby?

Please please someone help, I just dont know what to do

Reloc8

You have too many what ifs here, which can't be processed unless and until they materialise.

The central issue here is the welfare of the child, which could of course be affected by devious manipulation of the kind you suspect.

I say suspect because you don't in point of fact know whether the child did say what is reported, and moreover if so whether the child was manipulated into doing so or whether something else caused him or her to say it. I note that the child is special needs and as you will be aware sometimes it is difficult to be certain as to what was said and why. I don't for a moment suggest that you might have slapped the child.

If the child's welfare is being damaged then its a matter to raise in court. You should arrange to see a family law solicitor with your partner if you have real concerns in this respect (and yes manipulating a child into making false reports of assault against somebody could certainly go to that child's welfare).

Taking a pro-active stance by seeing a solicitor now will assist when and if any of the 'what ifs' in fact present themselves.

mammy2be

Hi,
Thanks for your response. The fact is we won't see the child until the end of the week and unfortunately, my partner is not being allowed to talk to them on the phone so we have no idea if she has gotten the child to say this or if it's just her saying that the child said it. The child's welfare has in no way been jepordised on our end. I want a stop put to this and not sure how to do that but will try to speak to a solicitor

MagicSean

If the child really did say that she would have done more than just call your partner. I wouldn't worry about it if you didn't do it as there will be no evidence to support her claim if she went to the gardaí, sw or courts. If your partner wants more access to his child it is up to him to fight for it in court. If things with the mother really are that bad and you think she might make stuff up you should start keeping a detailed record of every interaction you or your partner have with her or the child, and I mean every interaction. This way you will always be able to refute any claims she makes about conversations and the like.