19, never kissed a girl. Worried now...

LegacyUser

I'm nearly 19 now, and this would probably be embarrassing for most people but I don't really mind, I've never kissed a girl or had any relationship with one.

I find it hard to be instantly attracted to nearly all girls, there have been one or two where I can feel attracted to them based on looks alone but usually I need to actually talk to them, get an idea of who they are before I feel anything towards them. It's not like I don't like girls at all, I do and I have really liked a few but I know they didn't feel the same way so I didn't waste my time or hers doing anything about it.

If I'm walking down the street with my mates they might the odd time see a nice 'hottie' and comment on her hot ass or nice legs etc., but I can't instinctively do that. Personally, I don't honestly see the difference between a mega-hot bum and a normal one. It doesn't help that I have bad eyesight and everything is usually blurry but still I can't instinctively distinguish. I don't know what my 'type' is, all I know is that I think a girl's face is the most beautiful part of her body and that's what I tend to want to stare at, where as others want to look elsewhere.

I've always been kind of mature for my age, I was looking forward more to having a relationship and a family than going to a teenage disco back in the day, so I never went. I'm worried now that my lack of experience with women and lack of 'male instincts' will mean I'll never meet 'the one'?

P.S. This all sounds very factual and cold and serious a bit, but don't think that reflects me as a person. I'm a pretty normal funny guy besides the obvious oddities I wrote up there. I've had chances to kiss a girl before but I never felt like I should just do it for the sake of it. I'm kind of good looking, bit funny, kind of smart, and girls like me. What I'm trying to say is there is nothing else really wrong with me that I might not be thinking about to explain my problem

Conor_M1990

"I've had chances to kiss a girl before but I never felt like I should just do it for the sake of it" Next chance you get to snog a girl do it. alot of the time the girl wants you to make the 1st move just be yourself and your set

LegacyUser

I was the exact same as you, 19 and never kissed a girl but then in a club this girl who wasn't hot passed me on the dancefloor and i knew she wanted me, i went after her and got with her, i regret it now, have got with 2 other girls, none which i liked, so don't just get with a girl for the sake of it.

Liveit

Well "Nothing ventured, nothing gained"" as the saying goes. You are a guy so basically it is always going to be down to you to make the move. If you are worried then that means that you want to make the move. So just do it or else don't. Stick with the decision and be happy with it

Crucifix

oddguy wrote: »

It doesn't help that I have bad eyesight and everything is usually blurry but still I can't instinctively distinguish

Get glasses/contacts? Without my glasses I can barely see the face of someone standing right in front of me, let alone tell if they're good looking

Zen65

oddguy wrote: »

I'm worried now that my lack of experience with women and lack of 'male instincts' will mean I'll never meet 'the one'?

Op, you're over-thinking this altogether. At 19 inexperience is not an issue.

But I think Crucifix has hit the nail on the head. You should not be walking around with "blurry" eyesight, because if you do meet 'the one' you might mistake her for something else.

At the risk of sounding whimsical then, you should go to Specsavers! If you already have glasses and you choose not to wear them for vanity reasons, you're making a mistake... wear them!

Be at peace,

Z

AnneElizabeth

A lot of teenage relationships only happen because people like the idea of having a boy/girlfriend. I know lots of people (girls and guys) who are 18/19 and have never been out with anyone and the only people they've kissed are randomers at clubs (which in my opinion is kinda sad). Wait for someone you really like - anyone can kiss someone at a club, so just because you haven't doesn't make those who have any better than you. Plus no one cares how many people you've been out with/kissed - just shows you're not a man-whore. Most girls would actually love to have a guy with no ex's - no competition or anything to compare with :P
I doubt anyone you know has ever actually been in a relationship with someone they love - I'm 17 and certainly don't know anyone who is - so trust me it's no big deal to have not had a relationship - no one else has had a real one either.
You mightn't find the person you love until you're 30, but what's the point of going out with people you don't like!

magneticimpulse

AnneElizabeth wrote: »

I doubt anyone you know has ever actually been in a relationship with someone they love - I'm 17 and certainly don't know anyone who is - so trust me it's no big deal to have not had a relationship - no one else has had a real one either.
You mightn't find the person you love until you're 30, but what's the point of going out with people you don't like!

Exactly dont worry yourself about it. I knew guys who had not kissed girls or slept with girls. Then when they were 21 they were so eager to settle down with the 1st girl they met, had a kid and got married. 5 years later they were divorced.

Im 30 and Ive still not met the "right" person.