Frustrated!

LegacyUser

Hi I'm just wondering if anyone has or has had this problem and how they are dealing with it-
I have a good sex life with my BF we've been together for 6 years. We spend a good bit of time on foreplay and I am always very up for sex after it BUT when we have intercourse it's really sore, like the walls of my vagina won't open up or something even tho I want it my body rejects it, so frustrating! it's incredibly sore and getting worse and it kind of burns inside once he pulls out. It's been sore for years but only started burning in the last few months. I have been to the doctor loads of times for checks but they've found nothing wrong, no STD's nothing! (he's the only partner I've had in 6 years anyway) I'm booked in for another smear next month... My Bf is completely understanding and so patient and is willing to do anything to make this better for me, he's great, but it also must be very frustrating for him to see me in pain for the first few mins and then I get used to it but it's not as enjoyable for me and not fair on him that we can't have a normal sex life. I really need to fix this.
It's really depressing me.

Has this happened to anyone before??

Contessa Raven

Hey,

This is currently happening to me atm too. I went for a check up at my GP's yesterday and they also couldn't find anything. I was told to try using more lubrication and see how I go. I've to wait for test results back. The nurse seems to think I have thrush. Could this be it?

I've had thrush a couple of times but it never felt like this. But the doctor and nurse both seem to think that's it.

Maybe you've developed an allergy to latex (if you use condoms)? Also, apparently some women are allergic to semen. Maybe ask the doctor if they can test you for these allergies?

Other than that, I have no other ideas apart from STD's etc which has already been ruled out.
Just wanted you to know you aren't alone.

Good luck! I hope you can get it sorted!

LegacyUser

Thanks Contessa Raven, I don't feel like such a weirdo now.

I'll get the doctor to check for thrush when I get my smear cause I did get it frequently when I was younger, maybe that might have something to do with it..

I have looked into the latex allergies thing and I'm going to ask to be tested for it and I'll ask about the semen allergy at the above appointment aswell. We have switched to non latex condoms a month ago but no change so far.

Thanks for taking the time to write to me it's much appreciated and I hope you get sorted soon aswell.

Neyite

Just make sure you find a gentle lube. I found KY seemed to kickstart a bout of thrush for me, so switched to plain durex one.

LegacyUser

Could it be vaginismus? (the 'walls of my vagina won't open up' comment made me think it might be, also the 'burning sensation' comment, two tell-tale signs of the condition).

There are two types of vaginismus, primary (where a woman has never been able to insert something into her vagina) and secondary (where the condition develops, even after you've had sex previously).

I'm not saying you do have secondary, but it might be worth doing some reading up on it. There are plenty of ways around it, whether it's discussing it with a sex therapist or some exercises in learning how to control your pelvic floor muscles, etc. But it CAN be sorted out, so don't worry.

LegacyUser

This is a lot more common than you think...its just not talked about. I suggest you look into vaginismus

LegacyUser

Thanks a million!! This totally sounds like me - secondary vaginismus - I'm goin for my smear soon so I will talk to the doctor about it then and then I'll get the kit and try it out! I really hope this is what I have just knowing what it is, that it is a thing, makes me feel a million times better and that I'm not just crazy or weird

I'll let ye know how I get on in a few weeks.

Thanks again, Thank you so much for taking the time to write this, very very much apprieciated!!

LegacyUser

I have been seeing a new guy for 2 months and last night we spent the night together and everytime he tried to enter me it was just too sore (o so I had been drinking and was as dry as could be which didnt help) but I also was too tight and he just couldnt get in...and it hurt like hell....I am sorry for you having problems, but am very glad its not just me !!!