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What's going on in his head??

  • 12-01-2011 4:48pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I'll try and keep this brief. In a new relationship (3 months).

    In the beginning he told me how much he was mad about me, I told him I felt the same. It was him that brought up that in time that he could see us moving in together and then in a few years having kids. As we are both over 35 I thought 'yipee.. finally no games'. Over new years I bring up 'us' to check in and see if we are both still a happy. He catches me off guard when he says that he struggles with it a bit as it's a bit full on. He says he's not an overly affection person and doesn’t say how he feels a lot. When I asked if he still feels the same as the beginning and he says yes.

    I don't want to bring it back up again but it’s kind of bothering me. How can he talk about moving in and kids and then weeks later say that he finds the relationship is full on??

    I've got a dose of late and he has been doing sweet stuff for me and can't do enough and he is talking about Valentine’s Day and stuff we will do in the summer. When we are together, it’s great in every shape and form.

    And they say.. ‘woman are confusing’ ...what the hell...

    If anyone can explain or has been in my shoes before or can even though any light on the subject, all comments welcome..

    Thanks

    Fustrated


Comments

  • #2
    dub_3
    Closed Accounts Posts: 116 ✭✭dub_3


    Over new years I bring up 'us' to check in and see if we are both still a happy. He catches me off guard when he says that he struggles with it a bit as it's a bit full on. He says he's not an overly affection person and doesn’t say how he feels a lot. When I asked if he still feels the same as the beginning and he says yes.

    so was it literally just this one conversation and everything else is grand?


  • #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    We are back to seeing each other twice a week and a little less texting than before Chrimbo, but there is no more talk of 'I love this about you' and 'I'm nuts about you'. I'm just concerned that if I hadn't of brought things up would he of just gone on finding it hard to get it his head around it. Since this conversation I have backed off a bit and given him some more space.. hope this is the right thing to do..

    Am I over thinking things or have things just settled down and he is assuming that he doesnt need to be telling me cos he told me so before.


    Confused.


  • #4
    I am a friend
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,479 ✭✭✭I am a friend


    Hmmmmm maybe he ran faster then he could walk and is just feeling shaky now. I would take a step back and see how it pans out. To be honest there is prob as much chance of him freaking out and bolting as ye being able to work it out so just give him space and time to either un-freak out or cop on and make the relationship work.


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