Any advice for 2 year olds tantrums?

Voltex

Hi. We have 2 sons..my eldest is nearly 4 and from the day we had him has been a total angel..in fact my wife and I were mentioning that we dont think he has ever had a tantrum. In comparrison..our younger son is the complete opposit. From the very first night we had him he threw tantrums, which have carried on. We find ourselves sepnding so much time with him, we feel guilty about not spending time with our other son, as I thought to myself he was just more emotional than the older fella and needs more time with Dad, which Iv given him spades of.

Recently the tantrums have got alot worse...he's become terribly possessive of me and wont let me go...when I try to walk away he chucks one. Its getting very difficult.

Any suggestions?

Das Kitty

He's two now so can understand cause and effect. I would just ignore him and let him have the tantrum. Give him attention only for good behaviour. He'll quickly learn that the tantrums don't get him what he wants (your attention) and give up.

January

That's what I do with my 2 year old. If she has a tantrum I just step over her and walk away. The less attention they get the better, they'll come around within a few minutes.

silja

Another vote for ignoring. If he throws a tantrum over, say, not being allowed to play with older brother's toy, give the older brother attention during the tantrum.

Assuming he has ok language skills, you can also explain things to him- ie "I need to go wash the dishes now, but if you are a good boy and don't interrupt me, we can play with <insert favourite toy here" or "It is brother's turn to select a cartoon to watch while dad is on the phone, but it will be your turn next" etc. Also, how about some schedules, separate "mum and dad" time? Say, Monday, Wed, Fri, he gets an hour with just dad when you get home and mum spends time with older brother; Tues, Thur, Sat it's the other way around. It's what we do with the twins since our third was born when they were two years exactly, that gives them something to look forward to, and even plan what they want to do.

mariebeth

Like the others said, ignore the tantrum. But focus on his good behaviour as that will encourage him to repeat the behaviour he gets rewarded with attention for and hopefully if the tantrums get ignored they will begin to phase out as he realises that he's not getting the attention.