break up advice

LegacyUser

I want to break up with my bf, we've been together a while now and live together. I know there is on easy way to do this but I want to cause the least amount of pain that I can.

I have tried to tell him how I feel but he pleaded with me to give us another chance...I didn't know to deal with this and the emotional blackmail that followed at the time and so agreed.My feeling haven't changed and at this stage it would be best for both of us if i leave.

How do I tell him and how do I deal with the begging and pleading that I know will follow?

whatsamsn

Just be strong, firm and tell him that its over for you Yes he will be hurt but you cant stop from not hurting him at all. But how you do it can make it hurt less.

He probably loves you and thats why you begs you to continue. But remember, you are doing whats right for you and actually him as well.

Katgurl

Remember it wouldn't be kind to stay with him out of duty.

Pack your stuff for a few nights away while he's at work. When he gets back, sit him down, tell him you've tried, you wish your feelings hadn't changed but they have and that while you hate hurtin him, he deserves someone who loves him completely.

Then go, you could leave him a letter too if you communicate well that way.

Tell him you'll be back in a couple of days to get your stuff and arrange a time to speak to him again, perhaps in a few days? Make a definite arrangement for this to stop him going crazy pleading with you in meantime.

Finally, be very kind and very very firm.

Wibbs

Good advice above. I'd only add, when the details are sorted distance yourself from his life as much as possible. Do NOT try to be "friends". Not until a pretty long time has passed and he has moved on. Any contact may well be mistaken by him as a second chance.