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People dont like me :(

  • 03-12-2010 6:29pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Im not exaggurating when I say that I can count the number of people that think im sound on one hand. I think people dislike that Im a bit serious but even on nights out if we get chattin to a group of people Im the one thats never remembered or people dont make the effort to chat to again. One of my friends is just the total opposite to this...everyone knows her as the soundest girl ever..Im not jealous or anything because I love the girl to bits and she is a total legend! I just feel like I dont know how to be a 'sound' person!
    I know not everyone will like you but NOONE ever likes me!I just wish for once that people actually thought of me as dead on ya know?
    If anyones ever felt like this and found a solution id love to hear it :(


Comments

  • #2
    neuro-praxis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,184 ✭✭✭neuro-praxis


    You seem more concerned with people thinking you are "dead on" than actually being "dead on".

    Work on being someone that YOU really like. Be the person you want to be. Cultivate your interests, talents and passions. Offer warmth and friendliness to the people you meet. Stop looking inward. And for God's sake, stop caring what other people think.


  • #3
    happyfeet2010
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 69 ✭✭happyfeet2010


    Ya, I agree with neuro-p... you do sound to seem as if you care alot about what other people think about you. I am like that too.
    I have learnt that sometimes- if you worry about what other people think- it can come across as being someone that tries too hard and it gets annoying.

    -you try to be funny- you make people laugh- so that they like you.
    -you try to talk alot- in doing you think that you are an interesting person and have alot to talk about.

    When actually.. all of the above might be a bit too much for some people.
    I'm not saying that you do/don't do either of these things tho.

    Just be happy in yourself. Be glad that you have those 5 people (or so) that really like you. How do you know that more people like you, but they just don't show it as much as others that you know of.

    You say that your the one that never gets spoken to.. but it's a two way traffic!!


  • #4
    FoxT
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,204 ✭✭✭FoxT


    crappypersonality wrote: »
    Im not exaggurating when I say that I can count the number of people that think im sound on one hand. .
    .
    .
    .
    If anyones ever felt like this and found a solution id love to hear it :(

    Yes, I was that soldier. The bad news is there is no solution. The good news is that a solution is not required!

    I am now 46, and ( apart from Mrs FoxT) have 1 true friend, a few people that I am fond of, and some more cordial acquaintances. I don't generally get invited to parties, and if I am, nobody weeps when I leave.

    But, I am happy out! If you can 'count the number of people that think im sound on one hand' you are doing OK, believe me. Not all of us are cut out to be the life & soul of the party, and when it comes down to it, they probably don't have any more true, dependable, friends than you do.

    Be happy in your own skin, treasure the friends you have, go forth & do good!


    - FoxT


  • #5
    daithimac
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 515 ✭✭✭daithimac


    read the above post 20 times.

    Also look at how you interact with people. When you speak what distance do you stand from people. Nothing can be as off-putting as someone who stands to close to you when your talking and nothing will make people want to end a conversation quicker.

    Do you tend to get perhaps a little nervious or overexcited when meeting people and start talking quickly about whatever is in your head when perhaps not taking over the conversation, but rather saying "hi hows it going" and allowing people to continue on with what they were saying and then contributing.

    IMO in most instances where people are immediately disliked in general it is due to their body language and they way they carry themselves around others rather that what they actually say. watch your self and try to relax in social situations with an emphasis on learning new things from new people and enjoying their company rather than making them like you which is futile as to be blunt (and this is true in all cases) people don't initially care about other people unless they are impacting negatively on them. Its only when they have earned their trust by not pis5ing them off that they begin to like them.


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