Not making a move at the work Christmas party

John400

Hi all,

Some of you may remember that i was on here a couple of weeks ago asking for advice in that i was contemplating making a move/asking a girl out who i work with at my work Christmas party in Dublin city centre on 10th December.

I took the advice on board here and i also received advice from a platonic female friend who advised that i didn't do it.

I have now decided not to do anything..as obviously i will be putting myself in an arkward position if i do something stupid gargled in front of 50 people whom i work with, embarassing myself and this girl!

As i will be obviously meeting the girl in question amongst colleagues, what's the best way to approach this? Just be friendly and see how the night develops?

Obviously i've taken some of the pressure off myself so if i go to this with the attitude of seeing how the general night goes...i'd be better off wouldn't i?

Darlughda

Remove from your mind (if possible) any idea that something may happen on the night of your Christmas Work party.

Do not forget, this is the area of her place of work and people will protect their way of living at all costs.

Your aim should be a five minute conversation where you share a bit of conversation, maybe a joke or a laugh. But then leave!
Do not follow her around all night! You work with this person so you must avoid at all costs being the 'christmas creep'.

But, if you spend a few minutes having a nice conversation, ask her a few questions-keeping it light you may have a chance for a friendship, at least, developing in the future.

Surely, if you are genuinely interested, you are interested in getting to know her? If so, take it slowly and carefully. You cannot jepoardise your work situation no more than she can.

HavingCrack

Do you not find it a bit odd that you're waiting until the Christmas party to make a move on her? What's the difference between asking her on a date tomorrow or waiting until you're half drunk and in front of everyone??

magneticimpulse

If nothing has developed with this girl by now, I would say you are in the friends/work colleague zone and nothing is ever going to happen. If this girl was crazy about you, you would have found out about it by now.

Nothing worse then having the Christmas Work party creep or sucker fish follow you around on your works christmas party. Id just be civil with her, say hello for 5 mins and thats it.

John400

HavingCrack, she only started recently in my place of work and she's in a different department to mine. I can't ask her out on a date tomorrow because of the amount of work colleagues that are about the place and within earshot.

Don't worry i'm not going to follow her around at the Christmas Party.

magneticimpulse, nothing has happened developed with this girl because she is a new employee.

Darlughda, thanks for your valuable advice, yes i am interested in getting to know her. Taking it slowly and carefully is correct.

I will spend a few minutes with her and take it easy and see if i can develop a friendship first.

HavingCrack

John400 wrote: »

HavingCrack, she only started recently in my place of work and she's in a different department to mine. I can't ask her out on a date tomorrow because of the amount of work colleagues that are about the place and within earshot.

Don't worry i'm not going to follow her around at the Christmas Party.

magneticimpulse, nothing has happened developed with this girl because she is a new employee.

Darlughda, thanks for your valuable advice, yes i am interested in getting to know her. Taking it slowly and carefully is correct.

I will spend a few minutes with her and take it easy and see if i can develop a friendship first.

John those same workmates are going to be there at the Christmas party...

Don't try to be friends first, it just doesn't work like that. You're clearly interested in her as a potential girlfriend, not a friend. You're going to have to bite the bullet and ask her out before you become friends, otherwise it's much much much much harder...good luck.

IrishEyes19

Perhaps strike up a conversation with her at the Christmas Party, its a no win no lose situation really. And that way you can see her reaction when you talk to her, there might be some sign of nervousness when she talks to you or shyness, best of luck

Jennifurball

Have you not had any vibes from her at work? Noticed her looking over at you etc?

I know you don't really know her well but go with your gut feeling, it isn't the biggest crime in the world showing someone you like them and asking them out. Just do it as early in the night as possible to avoid asking in a drunken state/her reacting when she is drunk. You need an honest sober answer. Good luck.