what do i do!!!!!!!!!!!!

LegacyUser

Hey, so i dont know where to start with this, i met a girl over a year ago, she was already involved when i met her, she still is to the same guy, needless to say an affair started, i wont go on about what happened in the year, a lot of ups and downs to say to speak, anyway in the summer she said if she came back to ireland we would be together and that she would be with me and only me, i guess i never really beleived that would ever happen, im not that naive, anyway she was offered her old job back so she came back to ireland, she was still with her boyfriend (as i expected she would) things happened between us again, there were vacancies in the company she worked for, i applied for a job and surprsiingly enough i got it, now its an icredibly job to have especially in this climate (or in any for that matter) but now she got her boyfriend a job in the same company, it kills me seeing them together, he things im his friend, he comes to talk to me, i was with his girlfriend, so the 4 of us in the same building everyday, its kinda hard to avoid them, which i have been doing, one or two people have been wondering why im acting strange lately, and i know all the i shouldnt have got involved with someone in the first place as she had a boyfriend, shnould i quit the job??? not really sure, i hate coming here everyday and its starting to depress me, its like u know when u have feelings for someone, seeing them with someone else on a daily basis drives u crazy,

Darlughda

Nasty situation.

You have been played for a fool. She never had any intention of breaking up with her BF. Unfortunately, when you risk getting intimately involved with anyone in this situation, this is a risk you take.

You only have their word that they are about to end the previous relationship or intend to. However, in your circumstances you are all working together, which makes this particularly dangerous territory. She is obviously getting off on the danger involved here.

Do you want to be party to this? Does it turn you on too?
If not you have to make definite moves to end this now, because unfortunately, her interest in you is as part of a risky work situation that may, or may not involve a threesome, MMF. If not your scene, bow out now, and make clear your lack of interest in this.

Zaph

OP, if you're posting again on this thread would you mind using proper punctuation and paragraphs. Your post reads as a single sentence and is very hard to follow. Thanks.

finbarrk

You think you should quit the job? Don't . Grow up. She is with her boyfriend, maybe you shagged her at some stage,well done, what about it. Enjoy the thoughts of it as you hand him a coffee or a glass of water occasionaly.
Move on.

LighterGuy

finbarrk wrote: »

...Enjoy the thoughts of it as you hand him a coffee or a glass of water occasionaly.
Move on.

Icy Cold. I like it Finbarrk

Op,
- She is a ho.
- Her boyfriend is a fool.

She had sex with you not caring about the boyfriend and the boyfriend is a fool for trusting her. Fact is it hasnt been revealed yet (or he knows which makes him a bigger fool :rolleyes:) ... so dont worry. And never have feelings for a ho op.

Kimia

whereaminow wrote: »

Hey, so i dont know where to start with this, i met a girl over a year ago, she was already involved when i met her, she still is to the same guy, needless to say an affair started, i wont go on about what happened in the year, a lot of ups and downs to say to speak, anyway in the summer she said if she came back to ireland we would be together and that she would be with me and only me, i guess i never really beleived that would ever happen, im not that naive, anyway she was offered her old job back so she came back to ireland, she was still with her boyfriend (as i expected she would) things happened between us again, there were vacancies in the company she worked for, i applied for a job and surprsiingly enough i got it, now its an icredibly job to have especially in this climate (or in any for that matter) but now she got her boyfriend a job in the same company, it kills me seeing them together, he things im his friend, he comes to talk to me, i was with his girlfriend, so the 4 of us in the same building everyday, its kinda hard to avoid them, which i have been doing, one or two people have been wondering why im acting strange lately, and i know all the i shouldnt have got involved with someone in the first place as she had a boyfriend, shnould i quit the job??? not really sure, i hate coming here everyday and its starting to depress me, its like u know when u have feelings for someone, seeing them with someone else on a daily basis drives u crazy,

Who are the 4 of you? I thought it was just you, her and him?

LegacyUser

Op...was in a similar situation before with a girl from work, albeit the BF didnt work there, but saw him enough for it to get to me.

Anyway, a new girl started in the job and we hooked up, everyone loved her and the fact that we were seeing each other. Drove the other girl mad, was a complete b***h to the new girl, even though she was the most unhateable girl ever. Things didnt work out with the new girl, but was so happy to have met her because it stopped me wallowing about the original girl.

In summary, my advice would be to try and get out there and meet someone new. Dont have to be looking for a life partner, just someone to make you realise there are plenty of fish in the sea......(and if it pisses the old girl off, that's just an added bonus;)

Pebbles68

There's a school of thought that says if someone will cheat with you then there is a very good chance they'll cheat on you. She also told you that you are the one and then brings her boyfriend to Ireland with her, and then into the same company.
Chalk it up to experience and move on. Time heals.

WhodahWoodah

Personally, I feel sorry for the boyfriend who seems to be the only innocent party here. The OP started things with a girl knowing she had a boyfriend. She also knew she had a boyfriend. The poor boyfriend (if I'm reading this right) has moved to another country to be with her showing a serious commitment on his part, meanwhile she's so committed she's cheating.

OP best thing you could do for yourself in what some others here have suggested. Forget about her. She's clearly a bit of a tramp. For all you know you're only one of a selection of bits on the side she's had. You haven't conducted yourself much better. In future consider someone having girlfriend / fiancee / wife status to be a Stop Sign, turn around and walk away.

She might have seduced you - that was her decision. You can't control what she does. You can however control your own behaviour. If you're in control of yourself, then there is no way this could happen again. It only happened before because you BOTH wanted it to.

She doesn't seem to be bothered about you anymore, so just suck it up and get on with it. Don't cut off your nose despite your face by quitting your job, and while in work I suggest you adopt a neutral poker face, have as little to do with both of them as possible, and eventually it'll be like it never happened. Except hopefully you'll have learned to keep your hands off other people's partners! Good luck with it.