Pre marriage course

SSFG

Hi,
Just set the date for October next year, can anyone tell me how far in advance we can do the pre marriage course? The priest says they only accept Accord, All Hallows in Dublin, and Esker in Galway. Has anyone done these particular ones, are they any good?
We are in Galway/Clare so didn't really fancy going to Dublin, but depends on how much they are, so if anyone can let me know how much the various ones cost, that would be great,
Thanks!;)

Bookkeeper09

Hiya,
Im getting married next july and have organised our pre marriage course for next month. We're going with an accord one(in dublin)...honestly because it was the shortest and cheapest! 1 day and €140 per couple.
Will report back in a couple of weeks!

SSFG

The Accord ones I checked up in Galway/Clare/Limerick are over two days, I wonder how is the one in Dublin only one day? Obviously the shorter the better, I must check this out. The silly thing is I can do the course anywhere I want, but it has to be one of the ones recognised by the church

Bookkeeper09

Sorry! Got a bit confused....its actually avalon that our one is with!!

cyning

We're getting married next Sept and have to do the Accord one: it is the only one the parish will accept. Is over two Friday evenings and a Saturday and its €170. We're doing the course in two weeks

BC

I did the accord one, it was friday night and all day saturday and was 200 euro.
You can do it anytime, the further in advance the better as they get booked up quite quickly.

-K2-

All Hallows in Dublin is only 3/4 of a day long, so it might be ok for a daytrip if you can't get the others. It's a decent course; they are not heavy on the religious aspect so it's easy going.

magneticimpulse

Do you really need a pre marriage course if you've been going to Mass every sunday?

Why not just get married in a Hotel. Seems like a money gimmick this wedding course? I mean how many of you actually go to mass each Sunday anyway?? Its all hypocritical, getting married in Catholic church if you never go to Church in my eyes. Why not just have Civil cermony

cyning

magneticimpulse wrote: »

Do you really need a pre marriage course if you've been going to Mass every sunday?

Why not just get married in a Hotel. Seems like a money gimmick this wedding course? I mean how many of you actually go to mass each Sunday anyway?? Its all hypocritical, getting married in Catholic church if you never go to Church in my eyes. Why not just have Civil cermony

Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. A pre marraige course is not just about religion. Also NOONE in this thread has said wether they do or do not go to mass very week. It really isn't any of your business wether they do or don't either. They also do courses for interfaith weddings.

From the Accord website:

These are the modules that are dealt with on our pre-marriage courses :


* Family of Origin / Self- Awareness
* Communication
* Conflict Management
* Commitment
* Couple as Parents
* Church / Sacrament
* Owning your Sexuality
* Fertility Awareness and well-being

so it isn't all about religion. Before you criticise maybe you should check all your facts first? There is one module on Church/Sacrament and I'm sure the Fertility awareness says no birth control. The rest is non religious and is designed to help couples. Noone is telling you that you have to do one. But if people want to get married in a church that is up to them. And the requirement is to have a pre marraige course.

magneticimpulse

cyning wrote: »

Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. A pre marraige course is not just about religion. Also NOONE in this thread has said wether they do or do not go to mass very week. It really isn't any of your business wether they do or don't either. They also do courses for interfaith weddings.

From the Accord website:

so it isn't all about religion. Before you criticise maybe you should check all your facts first? There is one module on Church/Sacrament and I'm sure the Fertility awareness says no birth control. The rest is non religious and is designed to help couples. Noone is telling you that you have to do one. But if people want to get married in a church that is up to them. And the requirement is to have a pre marraige course.

Well i personally wont be wasting €170 on it, its my opinion. A course is not going to help my marriage, it either works out or it doesnt.

cyning

magneticimpulse wrote: »

Well i personally wont be wasting €170 on it, its my opinion. A course is not going to help my marriage, it either works out or it doesnt.

And noone is saying you have to. :rolleyes: But you don't need to be so confrontational to people asking for advice on WHICH course to do. Noone asked was it a waste of time. Noone asked could you get away with not doing it. Noone said they didn't go to mass. And referring to a pre marraige course for a Catholic wedding as a "money making gimmick" is rude in my opinion.

magneticimpulse

cyning wrote: »

And noone is saying you have to. :rolleyes: But you don't need to be so confrontational to people asking for advice on WHICH course to do. Noone asked was it a waste of time. Noone asked could you get away with not doing it. Noone said they didn't go to mass. And referring to a pre marraige course for a Catholic wedding as a "money making gimmick" is rude in my opinion.

well i do, how can a priest who has never been married give you advice on your marriage? and if ive been dating and living with someone already for 5 or 8 years, why do i need to do a course? its not like i decided on the spur of the moment to get married...its not like everyone is rushing to get married and i think all these extra money costs put people off getting married.

cyning

magneticimpulse wrote: »

well i do, how can a priest who has never been married give you advice on your marriage? and if ive been dating and living with someone already for 5 or 8 years, why do i need to do a course? its not like i decided on the spur of the moment to get married...its not like everyone is rushing to get married and i think all these extra money costs put people off getting married.

The priest doesn't give the pre marraige course... its the counsellors from the Accord centre that do. The course is because people don't always communicate the best and it's designed to help. And finally if €170 puts you off getting married I think thats mental. Accord do reduced rates for people on low incomes etc (the centre in Tralee does anyway). Tbh the pre marraige course and church hire will cost less than my dress... which is more important?

5cutch

magneticimpulse wrote: »

Its all hypocritical, getting married in Catholic church if you never go to Church in my eyes. Why not just have Civil cermony

It's a reasonable point. I'm going for a church wedding because the majority of those who'll be celebrating the day with us are churchgoers.

I haven't done my pre marriage course yet, but I've heard from those that have completed one that it's a useful, enjoyable experience. Haven't had a bad review yet.

Einstein

We did ours 2 months before hand. Only to be told by the priest that it's not a requirement, but it's made out like it is. So check with the priest that's marrying you.

5cutch

Thanks Einstein. I've got a lot of time and respect for the priest that's marrying us, but it's actually easier to do a one day course than to get in touch with him
Besides, they seem worth the day and cash.

steps_3314

Getting married in 6 weeks. Did the course about 3 weeks ago

3 hours on a saturday and 30 minutes on a monday evening to talk about results.

Thought it was mandatory. Otherwise would have donated the 120 euros

Einstein

Yea it wasn't as bad as i thought it was gonna be tbh. Ours was a Friday night and a Saturday morning. They kept trying to drag it out towards the end, the Friday evening would have been plenty!

SSFG

Cheers for all they replies. I wasn't too happy about paying to do it either myself, but from reading what people said about theirs, I don't mind so much now.
Also, I am getting married in the church that my parents were married in, by the priest that married them, and its purely for sentimental reasons, I plan to just have the wedding sacrament celebrated, not the full mass. Doesn't matter what your opinion or belief is, you can make your wedding to suit yourself, as long as myself and my fiance are happy, then I don't give a fiddlers about anyone else, or their opinions, we're paying for it!

Toots

OP, if you have to do it then book it as soon as possible. We did the course over a year before getting married, and it was grand, there isn't an expiry date on the cert or anything. Our priest said book as soon as you can because depending on which location you are in, it can book out months in advance. We booked ours in January but couldn't get the weekend course in the centre near us until May!

Patrick99

If you're getting married in your own parish (i.e. of the bride), you could even do the pre-marriage course within a month of the wedding. But if the wedding is somewhere else, it's best to do the pre-marriage course well in advance, say at least two months before the ceremony, or even earlier if marrying abroad.

Note that the Irish bishops issued a tough set of standards to be met by pre-marriage courses. (see www.premarriage.ie/criteria.html) Not all of the pm-courses you'll see advertised on the web fulfil what is now required. Which is why a couple should CHECK WHICH COURSES ARE APPROVED by their priest before making a booking.

Best wishes, whatever you decide!
Fr Pat Rogers

SSFG

Patrick99 wrote: »

If you're getting married in your own parish (i.e. of the bride), you could even do the pre-marriage course within a month of the wedding. But if the wedding is somewhere else, it's best to do the pre-marriage course well in advance, say at least two months before the ceremony, or even earlier if marrying abroad.

Note that the Irish bishops issued a tough set of standards to be met by pre-marriage courses. (see www.premarriage.ie/criteria.html) Not all of the pm-courses you'll see advertised on the web fulfil what is now required. Which is why a couple should CHECK WHICH COURSES ARE APPROVED by their priest before making a booking.

Best wishes, whatever you decide!
Fr Pat Rogers

Thanks Fr Pat, I actually did the course in January with yourself in Terenure, we both actually enjoyed it, a long day what with travelling from Clare but it was very interesting!

afkasurfjunkie

getting married in oct and just booked ours last week for june. we are doing the accord course in athlone and its costing 155e. if you look up the accord website it will tell you what locations in your area are holding the course and you can book it online. seemed to be be booked up at least two months in advance, but thats in the midlands.

Miss Fluff

My lovely fiance is C of E and I'm RC - we're getting married in a Catholic Church. Is it just Accord who do interdenominational pre-marriage courses or are there other providers? does anyone know? Thanks

Sleepy

You're best to ask the priest who'll be marrying you. Most have a preferred organisation (usually the more expensive ones) to carry out the fleecing, I mean, course.