Cant stop.

LegacyUser

Hi guys,

Just looking for a bit of advice. Let me start by saying I completely love my boyfriend to bits he is my world. I have never cheated and will never cheat but the thing is I am an awful flirt. Now I dont do this infront of him ever but when I am out on my own with the girls say I cant stop flirting with other guys! I am an attractive girl so I get some attention and I love it!! I always feel so bad the next day Like last night I was out and flirted my bum off with someone I knew previously! I know I would be upset if my bf acted like this as it is pointless! But with a few drinks I cant seem to stop myself ! I get so angry with myself but I just love attention, I dunno it makes me feel good I suppose.

I just want to stop, I dont feel like a good gf when I am like this.

Thanks guys

LighterGuy

Op,
you are going to get a few replies all phased differently but all with the same message: STOP! .. which is the only advice anyone can give you.

There is a big aspect you really should be cautious about too and that is that you are at high likelihood to cheat one day. Some guy is going to come along who you'll flirt with who will do it for you, or perhaps you'll be that drunk your conscience will be numbed out. And sadly it wont be a "mistake" when that happens.


Other risk is that you BF could find out about your flirting - these things have a crazy way of getting back.

Only solution is to stop.
How? simple, you just keep reminding yourself not to flirt.

Des Carter

Or cut down on the drink

S23

If drinking modifies your behaviour to lead you to do things you don't like/are potentially hurtful to people you care about then don't drink anymore. If you can't handle what you drink then simply don't do it

LegacyUser

End your relationship with your poor boyfriend now and go off and enjoy your attractiveness by getting all of the attention in the world from single men.

Your bf deserves far better so set him free to be with someone who doesn't need ego boosts from other men to keep them happy.

TitoPuente

I'd say end your relationship and stay single until you're mature and respectful enough to behave appropriately in a relationship.

baby and crumble

OP, I'm going to come at this from a slightly different angle. I'm a terrible flirt too, all my family are (which I only noticed when we were all flirting with the same waitress one night at dinner!!!!). But I'm very upfront about it with my partner, who is pretty bad herself. What we did, was rather than say no flirting, which would be really difficult, was to lay down some ground rules.

Flirting is fun, and yeah, it's an ego boost when someone flirts back. I genuinely don't see the problem with it, so long as you know where you and your partners boundaries are. For me and my partner, the boundary is flirting with intent to score. Flirting cos you find someone cute is fine, flirting for extra or better service in a club, totally fine. Flirting and not being upfront about being in a relationship is not cool though.

You said yourself you don't cheat, so no biggy. But maybe this is a good time to check in with your bf and see what he thinks- maybe say to him "god, such and such told me I'm a terrible flirt, am I really that bad?" and bring it up. See what he thinks. I think it's perfectly healthy and natural myself. I know my partner flirts with other people when I'm not around. Doesn't bother me.