Graduation Worries

LegacyUser

Hi,

My graduation is coming up and I really don't want to go to it. I made NO friends in college and will feel weird and awkward the whole day. I have plenty of friends but none from my course. I've come to terms with this and have no real problems with it. The problem is that my parents are so over the moon about it, they are building it up like made and I feel really really stressed about it. I'm worried about going to it and literally not talking to anybody, they're going to think I'm some sort of weirdo and have let them down.

Any advice? I'm going to go to it but I think I should probably tell me folks about why I won't be even able to tell them anyone's name, thats how bad it was in college. I never made an effort or anything like that.

niceoneted

Oh goodness, have you expressed to your parents that you weren't actually going to go. You can explain to them the reason then.
They are obviously proud of you and you should be of yourself. Just because you did a specific course does not mean you had to have friends on that specific course. I often got more friendly with other classes of the course of people from other courses.
Do you know anyone in your class even in a casual way?

I would suggest if you and your parents still decide to go ( you will be glad you did) that ye go to the ceremony and then just organise a nice lunch/dinner for yourselves after.
This is what I am doing with my parents in a few weeks. It's a part time masters I did and only 3 are going to the grad.

tinkerbell

There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with not having friends in your class! I was friends with only two or three people in my class - all my other friends were in completely different courses to me! And I knew nobody when I started college, so it's not like the friends in other courses were old friends from home.

In the end, you go to college to get an education first and foremost. So why worry about not being able to know peoples' names? I doubt your parents are going to be bothered about that, they are gonna be more excited by seeing you get presented with your degree or whatever in your cap and gown, than worrying about your lack of friends from that particular class.

Congrats on graduating!

thefeatheredcat

It's your day to stand up and be proud of your achievements and accomplishments and your parents will want you to enjoy that!

Graduation ceremony - well there most likely won't be much hanging around doing nothing as people are going to be worried about their gowns and hats and being fussed over by parents and the photographer....
The ceremony and all that won't be too long, depends on class/year size and most people will have plans to go out for lunch/dinner with parents afterwards.

at least, that's what I recall from mine anyway, and I didn't know too many people in my year by the end as most my friends at the time were in different courses.

Your parents aren't going to think less of you for not knowing people's names... they're just going to be thinking of you and how proud they are of you!
but they may be a bit disappointed that you don't get that chance to go to the grad ceremony, get the photos and all that. It's a kind of closure too.

Even if you have the grad ball on the night or later on, sure that's optional and some people may not be up for spending the money/time anyway on it, I doubt your parents would be upset if you didn't go to that and wouldn't think less of you anyway.

LegacyUser

Thanks for all the comments. I am going to go anyway just really stressed about letting my parents down. I don't know why, I did well in my degree. I just suppose I'm worried that they'll think I'm some kind of freak, I literally don't even know anyone's name! I did a course that involved only about 10 hours per week, most of the work was done in the library which might have involved 40 hours per week. The classes were so big and impersonal I never got the opporunity to make friends. I had plenty of friends anway so never worried about it. I was never in campus which is how most people seem to know each other and never bothered with class parties.

I'm just going to sit them down one of these days and explain the situation to them.

CK2010

tbh i wouldnt make a big deal about telling your parents.. i was kinda the same, i only had a few friends in my core class which is the one i graduated with, all my friends were in another class, and i was kinda worried that my mam would expect me to have loads so i just casually said to my mam that most of my friends arent in my core class just so she wasnt expecting much!

the day will fly in, if its like mine you'll be arranged in order to accept the parchment (sp?) so you neednt worry! you're lumped with people whether your friends or not and everyone is so excited that you all just chat together!

i went out for dinner after mine but there was a little buffet at the college and we stayed there for a while scoffing our faces! i talked to a few close friends afterwards and just said congrats to the faces i knew, but other than that i basically celebrated with family! as did most other people too!

congratulations on graduating! enjoy the day! organise a meal for afterwards cause the relief once its over will be nice! your parents are happy for you and the fact that you've graduated and done them proud, i doubt their even thinking about other people!

LegacyUser

Hey OP, I have the same problem but for a different reason. I had to repeat two of my finals and because of this I wasn't able to graduate with my year and have to graduate nearly two months later. I was in a small class and I think I will be the only person from my course graduating at it. So I am not going know anyone. Still going though as I want to get the photos

tenchi-fan

Hi
I think you should go anyway. It's probably going to be one of the proudest days of your parents' lives.
For my graduation the seats were already assigned in alphabetical order so I ended up sitting beside people who weren't my friends. Guests were further back in the hall and my parents ended up standing beside a guy called Philip's mother. When I caught up with my parents Philip also caught up with his, so I ended up getting my photo taken of me, philip, some other guy and the minister for education (whoever it was) .. and I really didn't get talking to my friends at all that day.