Texts from my ex

LegacyUser

Well 2 months ago i got a text from my ex and he asked how i was, i replied and he never wrote back after, then yesterday i got a text off him again asking the same again, but he left an "x" this time. I didnt bother replying because Im not sure if hes doing for his own self confidence, or if hes actually just being friendly. Should I text back again or just forget about it again. I still miss having him around. Would like to continue being friends

tenchi-fan

It sounds like you're not over him.
You need to think why you split up to begin with and whether it's worth bringing up all those feelings again.
You can't be that stuck for a friend.. and making new friends can be more refreshing than going over the same ground.

LegacyUser

Honestly I don't think I am either, he told me it wasnt anything to do with me that we broke up though, so I'm just confused. I don't know what he's thinking

CDfm

Why not phone and ask.

Drodan

Agree with above, call him on it, then you'll know either way. Just don't get invested on the idea of getting back together, it's purely a fact finding mission.

kylith

I disagree with the above. Some people will text their ex as an ego boost for themselves. If he sends the first text then ignores you when you reply then that's probably what he's doing, especially if you respond to his text immediately. I'd recommend leaving it for a good while, like a few hours, then texting and asking what he wants. If he says 'nothing' then tell him to stop texting you.

By constantly texting you he's trying to stop you from moving on, and making himself feel that you're still wrapped around his little finger.

tbh

these texts didn't arrive late at night by any chance?

LegacyUser

No the texts came in the morning. I should probably not text him so, I just thought he wasnt over me or sumtin and maybe there was a chance but guess not

Faith

I occasionally give in and text my ex to see how he's doing. He always replies, and we text for a little while. He's always the one to stop replying which drives me mad. Seeing as your ex doesn't reply at all, it could just be a power play, to make sure that you'll still jump when he tells you too. If a conversation was initiated, I'd think differently, but there's not. You're probably right not to reply, I always find I'm a bit frazzled after talking to my ex.

LegacyUser

thanks faith, i dont think i'll bother. Do you think he does this because he is not over me aswell, or is he over me and just doing it for a laugh/ego boost?

I am a friend

No one can know that but him... But Ill say (and I am female), if I were in love with an ex, they would know.

tbh

shyguy2010 wrote: »

thanks faith, i dont think i'll bother. Do you think he does this because he is not over me aswell, or is he over me and just doing it for a laugh/ego boost?

he'd want to be a real dickhead to be doing it for the laugh. Without knowing the guy, or you and just going on the signs, I would say he's texting you when he feels a bit lonely, or when he's thinking of the breakup and it's getting him down. I'd back that theory over the one that says he's miserable without you because if he were, he'd contact you more often. My gut says that he knows the breakup had to happen but that he does miss you and think fondly of you. And in fairness op, if you're going to break up with someone, that's not a bad way to be.
you sound like you might not be over him yourself?

LegacyUser

nah I dont think I am tbh. Which is preety sad, since it has been months since we've seen eachother. I just have trouble bout letting go of the past, as cheesy as it sounds ha

tbh

shyguy2010 wrote: »

nah I dont think I am tbh. Which is preety sad, since it has been months since we've seen eachother. I just have trouble bout letting go of the past, as cheesy as it sounds ha

sounds totally normal to me I'd be careful tho about getting your hopes up about a reunion, it'll stop you moving on and meeting someone else. I know it's tough, but it's just like anything else, the more time that passes, the easier it gets.

LegacyUser

Another thing that is plaguing my mind is I feel like I'm in competition with him now. I feel I have to get a bf before he does or something. Id be afraid if I saw him sometime with someone else, not that I think he wants a relationship with anyone at the min. I just want something to show that I have moved on before he has.

PS sorry for the slight topic change lol

tbh

shyguy2010 wrote: »

Another thing that is plaguing my mind is I feel like I'm in competition with him now. I feel I have to get a bf before he does or something. Id be afraid if I saw him sometime with someone else, not that I think he wants a relationship with anyone at the min. I just want something to show that I have moved on before he has.

PS sorry for the slight topic change lol

ha! that happens too It really does pass with time