Help me with my 13 year old daughter.

lizzygee

My daughter and I have an interesting relationship. Half the time she is sweet light the other half I am queen bi?+h from hell. But that is not the problem. Wednesday morning I get a call from her school saying that she was being sick, nothing new there I thought it's PE to day and she doesn't want to do it, but no the school then informed me that her friends said she had taken paracetamol. So to the Dr. then to the hospital. Thursday we had meetings with a psych my daughter several times without me and then one with me without my daughter. They then had more meetings with my daughter without me on the Friday and when they got around to talking to me they said that they are going to place her in Warrenstown juvenile center. They have not spoken to her dad her brother, her grandparents not even her friends. I feel like I have been torn asunder. Can they do this? can I get any help? What am I to do.

Khannie

Did they tell you why?

I'd see a solicitor if I were you.

Enter Username

lizzygee wrote: »

My daughter and I have an interesting relationship. Half the time she is sweet light the other half I am queen bi?+h from hell. But that is not the problem. Wednesday morning I get a call from her school saying that she was being sick, nothing new there I thought it's PE to day and she doesn't want to do it, but no the school then informed me that her friends said she had taken paracetamol. So to the Dr. then to the hospital. Thursday we had meetings with a psych my daughter several times without me and then one with me without my daughter. They then had more meetings with my daughter without me on the Friday and when they got around to talking to me they said that they are going to place her in Warrenstown juvenile center. They have not spoken to her dad her brother, her grandparents not even her friends. I feel like I have been torn asunder. Can they do this? can I get any help? What am I to do.

Edited as it was not the kind of comment needed here - I hope someone can give some helpful advise

lizzygee

My daughter is in Crumlin hospital. They say she says she has tried to self harm herself (no one has ever noticed such) she says she is sad and fed-up, but every one who knows her were all shocked to hear the news. If it was attempted suicide there were no signs no note and you don't OD at school. Please We are stumped.

CK2010

all this seems a bit like something was left out in your post.

sorry if im just not reading it right- did your daughter take over the recommended dose of paracetamol and hence they think it was a deliberate attempt to harm herself? and then the docs took whatever action they thought was required and it has since come out that shes unhappy and has been self harming, but you think they have the wrong end of the stick?

thats what i took from it, am i in any way right?

maybe she didnt necessarily want to harm herself but it was a cry for help? maybe she didnt want to go to you so she did it in school?

sorry im not much help, maybe if you could elaborate a bit, you're probably just as confused yourself, sorry. just try to stay calm, everyone just wants to help your daughter so its important to be calm with her and help her through whatever it is shes going through. dont place blame on anybody, including yourself and your daughter, just try to sort out whats going on with her and work from there.

sorry i cant help you more, hopefully someone else can. best of luck

lynski

Gosh, you poor thing. I cant really help, except to say that i worked in a school a few years ago and one day some of the girls were drinking cola with paracetamol to get a 'kick' from it. Only one girl actually drank any quantity of it, the others egged her on and tried it but did not drink the whole thing. Is it possible that she was just experimenting? and the other stuff has come out after that, but not really related to it? most 13 yr olds are sad and fed-up, or bored, or confused.
Could you talk to her friends again perhaps?

wolfpawnat

OP, my heart goes out to you. To the best of my knowledge, the school has to inform you of EVERYTHING concerning your child, and to not do so is more than likely illegal! Get to a solicitor, worst they can say is no law was breeched.

Did the school/doctors say how much paracetamol she took, over 12 at once can cause multiple organ failure, but less than that, she is just going to be light headed for a day or 2!

A lot of teens do not attempt sucide with such acts, they are merely seeking help for something they see as a problem. The only thing is with a 13 year old, they most of the time do not know what real problems are and she is feeling upset over something menial! Have you spoken to her since she has been admitted to Crumlin? Do you know what she is so upset about?

Best of luck OP!

littlebitdull

I would not be allowing them to place my child anywhere without my permission, get more information from them. What exactly is Warrenstown? What sort - if any - of treatment will she be recieving there.

You need more information, and you may need to fight for your child here. Do you want her admitted anywhere? Do you or your own doctor feel its necessary?

You mention her Dad, get his opinion, get him involved.

Fight and help your child.

littlebitdull

lizzygee wrote: »

If it was attempted suicide there were no signs no note and you don't OD at school. .

If it was attempted suicide ... you may never find any signs or notes. Many familes who have suffered the loss of someone through suicide say they never saw it coming.

And yes ... sometimes people do OD at school or at work ...anywhere.

That is not to say it was an attempt but its also not to say it wasn't.

spurious

Warrenstown is a specialist psychiatric facility for children and adolescents.

Delicate_Dlite

Hi, I'd just like to say, I'm really sorry to hear what you're going through. If it helps, your daughter is in the best place possible. It's brilliant that she's getting help and talking to them.

Self harm is not necessarily indicitive of suicidal thoughts, but both are symptoms of depression. I have a history of self harm myself and I was self harming for over a decade before it came to light. Those who knew me where shocked, and my family, esp my mother could not believe that I'd hidden it so well. Those who self harm are incredibley good at hiding it.

Although I understand your need to know everything, and you should. however your daughter is entitled to have some level of privacy with her doc's/therapists while she gets everything off her chest and starts to deal with it. If she is a danger to herself, self-harm/suicidal, you'll be made aware of this.

My advice from the self harmers p.o.v is to be there for her, be supportive, and let her talk to you in her own time, if she finds it easier to deal with her problems with a professional, then let her. The important thing is that she's getting help.

I believe temple street children's hospital, have a support group for parents of self harming kids. Can't seem to find a link to it at the moment tho.

goosie2005

Hi the SPACE programme based in St Frances Clinic, temple st hospital offers support for parents of children self harming. maybe give them a phone call. Also talk to your gp.

gaeilgegrinds1

When I was in school a classmate of mine took 6 paracetamol and ended up somewhere for a bit. I would say you are the boss here, nobody can tell you where she should or should not go but beware you listen to what she says, maybe she does need the help? I hope things improve for you. I work with 13 year olds a lot and she sounds typical of most I've met if that is any consolation.