Finding my dad

allanb49

Ok so i'll give a quick recap of what's going on.

My mum and dad divorced in 96,

My dad is english and from portsmouth.

There is no contact details for him,

I have a partial address for my granddad of 1 argyle st and it's near Manchester

I've tried searching for my dad as he was/is the captain of a ship and the company he was with was based in Monaco

All my searches have come up naught.

I tried looking for a registar of captains and various different iterations

I know the guy was a dickhead but i'm getting married next year and would like to see/talk to him before i do.

This urge has been growing for years. about 9 years now It's getting worse and every time it crops up it gets stronger and i get more emotional.

I won't be inviting him to my wedding as it would be a kick in the teeth to my mum but it would be nice closure for me to talk with him

I understand he's nothing more than a stranger to me having not being involved in my life for 20 years.

But at least my mind would be at rest if i could find some way to contact him or my relative's even not getting a reply just knowing i have sent a letter off or a phone call.

Can anyone help or give advice on what i should do?

Neyite

dont know anything about tracking down your dad, but why not post in the Adoption forum - they might have information on tracing family and might have a few ideas for you.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=879

good luck

dory

I just google mapped your address near Manchester. Nice homes there! You could send a letter there. My aunt did that to track down my father and it worked wonders.

Other than that, as has been stated, the Adoption forum would have some good advice.

Elessar

Allanb49 I have been down the road you are going to take to trace my own father in the UK and I found two options that would be of use to you.

The salvation army in the UK will trace your father and forward on a letter from you to him. I couldn't use them because my mam was not married to my father when I was born (they are a religious organisation).

Another, official option you could use is a service called Traceline. It might not be operational anymore but they found my father and forwarded on a letter to him from me. They wouldn't give me his address but regardless he never replied.

A word of advice: have no expectations.

allanb49

Neyite wrote: »

dont know anything about tracking down your dad, but why not post in the Adoption forum - they might have information on tracing family and might have a few ideas for you.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=879


There's an adoption forum on boards :eek:

good luck

dory wrote: »

I just google mapped your address near Manchester. Nice homes there! You could send a letter there. My aunt did that to track down my father and it worked wonders.

Other than that, as has been stated, the Adoption forum would have some good advice.

Tried googling the address but there's a load of them, One time i'm told it's manchester the other cumbria. :P

Elessar wrote: »

Allanb49 I have been down the road you are going to take to trace my own father in the UK and I found two options that would be of use to you.

The salvation army in the UK will trace your father and forward on a letter from you to him. I couldn't use them because my mam was not married to my father when I was born (they are a religious organisation).

Another, official option you could use is a service called Traceline. It might not be operational anymore but they found my father and forwarded on a letter to him from me. They wouldn't give me his address but regardless he never replied.

A word of advice: have no expectations.

I dont have any expectations just to put my mind at rest that i tried to contact and that will be enough. I'll try the salvation army and traceline

Cheers guys

allanb49

Got my grandad's number, called him. woman answered the phone, asked was jim there. asked who was calling, gave my name. before i could finish the name was told he died in march.

Part of me wants to think she's lying, the woman is my grandad's second wife. My mum says she always thought we where after his money.

But i know that thought may just be denial.

My mum says i should ring back and ask for my dad's or aunt's contact details. But would that be pushing it i wonder? I've already tried to contact this family and that's all i wanted to do. Should i let sleeping dogs lie? or should i poke what could potentially be a hornets nest?