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I feel like its not gonna stop

  • 28-09-2010 9:52pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 70 ✭✭


    Well everyone is probably sick of my posts on this but my life sucks! I feel ill never get to be happy!

    I had to hide my sexuality until i was 19, which was hard enough! then i finally come out and thinks are looking up even get a bf!
    Then i look forward to a good summer and then everything falls apart!

    I get an sti, my bf breaks up with me. Had to spend all summer in my room trying to get over him, and still am not over him. I find out that I have to get 3 surgeries for my sti, because the stupid ****ing doctors coudnt tell me what was wrong in the first place, even in the sti clinic! The doctor says it will be well into next year before everything is sorted.

    I thought college years were supposed to be a good fun, but I cannot enjoy it right now! I cant enjoy life right now. I feel so trapped right now! I cannot talk to my friends or family, I cant open up to anyone, especially about my health problem. My ex bf was the only one i could talk to. Now he doesn't want me, and I have a feeling no one else will.

    I feel im at breaking point, I could just barely hold in the tears today on front of my mother. I hate my life!


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,830 ✭✭✭✭Taltos


    Look OP - you got an STI and are currently getting treatment for it.

    Just do your best to take one day at a time.
    Just focus on the next thing you have to do to get yourself back to full health.

    Some lessons you have learnt though.
    1. Doctors do make mistakes / sometimes the diagnosis is difficult.
    2. Always use protection (look I am guessing here as we have no details on the STI nor do we need any), while it will not protect against all - it will against most.
    3. Your ex - well plainly speaking - he's a prat.
    This is when you need him most - and if he has just cut and run - well good riddance to bad rubbish. You are better off without him. Again you haven't said if you were monogomous or faithful - so assuming he gave you this, if so - I damn well hope he apologised...

    This might all be way too much you want to share with your mum - but she is there for you to help you through your breakup (without all the details). Do try to find a friend you can share this with - or if you prefer just use this site to unburden yourself.

    Each day you work to getting healthier something else will be going on - you will be slowly getting over your ex too and before you know it you will no longer be thinking of the guy that ran just when you needed him to lean on...

    So - to summarize. - Your life is already getting better - so very slowly so you cannot see it - but it is ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,339 ✭✭✭tenchi-fan


    I think you have a lot of maturing to do. The sti is a set back but from another point of view, it's a wake-up call too. How do you think aids would have affected your life.

    It's going to be a tough year but use the time constructively. Get involved in activities that let you move on from your ex. Set a few goals, try and make new friends and maybe plan a holiday. As for opening up.. you should form a few friendships or relationships with people who you can discuss these issues with.

    You might also consider some sort of counselling if you can afford it. Just a professional you can bounce your thoughts off and get some constructive feedback. Your mental health is very important.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Good advice there so far.
    You know problems are only problems,especially the ones you've outlined when you make them problems.

    Do open up to someone.Seek out someone that you can talk to,even if it is a stranger at the end of a phone line.
    Vent in other words,it's a physical need,we all have it.
    But remember this.Life is worth it.
    Some people at their wits end want to know what the point in this.
    I say whats not the point!

    Let me give you a small pointer.If you could move to where nobody knows your name and bring the text book of how to enjoy life with you and follow it chapter and verse from scratch,you'd do it right?

    Let me tell you now,that you can do the exact same without moving anywhere at all..just chin up and smile,vent away here or on the phone to someone and get up and start again.It's never too late and obviously at your age,it's not even started in my opinion.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 70 ✭✭gayguy2009


    Taltos thanks for the reply, yes i was faithful to him, and in all fairness its an sti that some people may not no they have. I just hate the fact that i dont have his shoulder to lean on. I just want someone :( he's prob already moved on which hurts me more! Here I am moping about him :(


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,830 ✭✭✭✭Taltos


    He left you when you needed him most.....
    He's a prat - but he did you a favour in that you know this now for a fact...
    No coming back from that one - no matter what he says.

    Now - repeat after me - --- He is a PRAT :)


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 70 ✭✭gayguy2009


    he's a prat lol


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