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Possessive/Jealous Gay Male Friend - Anyone Else Ever Experience?

  • 27-09-2010 8:26pm
    #1
    Distorted
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,064 ✭✭✭


    I have a close male friend who recently revealed to me that he is gay. A couple of years ago we dated while he was in the closet, without anything physical happening. I got quite confused by his behaviour as he would get very jealous whenever any other guys showed interest, or even spoke to me. We went on holiday over the summer and he revealed it to me then, though hardly anyone else knows.

    Despite this, he still gets really jealous when other men show interest in me and will interfere, going as far as to sit down with us and stare into my eyes and interrupt the conversation. We are both runners and no matter what obscure race I do, he seems to find out in advance about it and turn up too, where he will express "surprise" that I am doing it. He continues to run for the same tiny club as I do despite living 200 miles away, which means we inevitably meet up quite a lot.

    Since he isn't out of the closet, other male mutual friends are convinced there is something going on between us, which no doubt suits him.I was going to let the friendship fizzle out as I find him a little odd, but I never seem to manage to get away from him. Its not a huge problem, but I just find it all a bit odd and wondered if anyone had experienced similar?


Comments

  • #2
    Kevster
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,980 ✭✭✭Kevster


    Hey,

    How exactly have you not managed to get away from him? In my own life, I get away from people by never responding to them, or even going so far as to change my number and email. Have you tried either of these

    I'm not sure what he is up to. Perhaps he doesn't have a clue what he wants in life; and/or he is possessive and has for whatever reason marked you as a prized possession in his life.

    Kevin


  • #3
    Princess Peach
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    He seems a bit lonely to me. He's confided in you, so obviously sees you as a good friend and goes out of his way to see you so often. I think he's just going through a hard time at the moment and wants to be close to you. If you want to be a good friend, I wouldn't advise cutting him out of your life. But maybe try talking to him. I know its hard and might hurt his feelings, but just tell him you don't like how he interferes with your relationships. Ask him if he knows why he does it, and maybe ye can work on a solution together, like if it is because he's lonely, try and make some new friends for him.


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