Age gap making her uncomfortable

LegacyUser

Hi,

I've recently got back into contact with a girl I used to be very 'friendly' with a few years ago but we never had a real relationship. The thing is, shes 3 years older then me and feels really uncomfortable about it. I'm 22 and shes 25, the only thing is that i'm very young looking aswell, i've been told I look about 17 by some people!

We went out recently and spent the night together, we didn't sleep with each other as we had only just met again and she didn't want to sleep with me straight away. While we were lying in bed she kept telling me that i'm to young for her and its to weird being with me even though the pair of us are ideal for one another, these were pretty much her exact words. The thing is I really like her and would love to have a proper relationship with her this time. Has anybody ever had an experience with this before? I want to explain things to her that it doesn't matter to me and that I really want to be with her, I think shes more afraid of what people will think of her if they seen us together. I'm meeting her again in a few weeks and I could really do with some advice before I see her again.

Thanks

ManOfMystery

She's being a bit dramatic about the whole thing. It's only 3 years - and to be honest, once you get out of school and into your twenties, the whole age gap starts to become a non-issue anyway.

You need to encourage her to focus more on how you get on together, that's ultimately more important than 2 numbers which are fairly unimportant in the grand scheme of things.

AnonoBoy

3 years is nothing.

Sounds to me like she's signposting her get out excuse well in advance.

Be prepared for this not to go anywhere OP.

Taltos

Tell you what.
Next time she makes a comment like this.
Stop whatever you are doing - just say "look it's only 3 years not twenty. Sorry you can't seem to move beyond this, clearly your feelings for me are not strong enough to get past a few years. I'm not going to waste anymore of our time here" -pay the bill / get your coat and calmly walk away.

Either she will stop you and cop on or that will be that.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the help everyone, I'll just explain it to her so and check what she says after I lay everything out perfectly. I've wanted this girl for years to be honest with you and after she got back into contact with me recently, probably should have mentioned that earlier. If she leaves it will suck but suppose its better then this bullsh!t of 'i'm to old for you but still fancy ya' happening every time I see her

whatsamsn

Translation:

shes using the age gap as an issue rather than just coming out and saying: she doesnt want a relationship with you.

So op, if i were you dont bother talking to her again.

My parents are 69 and 66....

.... at some point they realised 3 years didnt mean much to them, and they have been together since she was 18 and he was 15....

... someone I met here on boards once taught me a good slogan. "Love people despite their age, not because of it".