Flowers at work

Sound Bite

I got flowers delivered to work today from a new guy I'm not long dating. No reason - not my birthday or anyway.

Anyway, my question is do you enjoy getting flowers at work?

Personally I hate it, I prefer to keep my private life seperate & would have much preferred if they were delivered to my home address.

Now before you call me ungrateful, I do appreciate the gesture just I'd prefer if it is wasnt done at work. Also had when you see women at work getting flowers on valentines or birthday when the share a house with their partner. Could they not just give them to them at home. Think some women love the attention. I hate it & all the nosey questions that go with it.

(PS - he had said he was going to for my birthday a few wks ago & I did tell him I rather he didnt).

amiable

Marking his territory i feel

nextbestintown

Shows weakness on the guys part. It always seems the girl loses interest with such needy public pissing on the girl... :pac: :mad:

The Big Red Button

I'd hate it.

My work life is separate to my personal life. I'm a professional, I don't feel the need to discuss every detail of my lovelife with my colleagues. I'd be very embarrassed and p*ssed off if a guy did that to me.

And if it was a guy I wasn't seeing very long, it would freak me out. I mean, it would basically be "pushing" me to tell everyone about him, even though I mightn't be ready to yet?! It's a very presumptuous, possessive sort of a gesture.

And then there's the fact that if a guy did that to me, he obviously mustn't know very much about me as a person at all.

I know everyone's different, and plenty of girls would love that sort of thing! It just wouldn't be for me though. At all.

Novella

Tbh, I don't think I'd mind. I wouldn't start looking into it, "Ooh, is he marking his territory?" or whatever. I'd rather focus on the positive in the situation, the fact that I'd then have nice, pretty flowers and just be happy.

RedXIV

Jeez, i feel bad now.... I sent them to my current OH because we could only meet once a week when we first started going out and one week I couldn't make it so I sent flowers with an apology.

I wasn't doing it to mark territory or anything, I just wanted her to know I was thinking of her.

Glad she took it better than ye lot

Dudess

It's a bit embarrassing (not in and of itself but the way others in the workplace react to it) and fairly cheesy, however it's sweet and lovely too - I can't see how it could be construed as anything other than well intentioned (apart from when it's done despite the woman asking that it not be). It's thoughtful and I suppose an expression of love/caring, which is great.

I'd take or leave it - it's nice when it happens but I wouldn't care if it never did either.

The Big Red Button

Novella wrote: »

Tbh, I don't think I'd mind. I wouldn't start looking into it, "Ooh, is he marking his territory?" or whatever. I'd rather focus on the positive in the situation, the fact that I'd then have nice, pretty flowers and just be happy.

Do you not think there's nicer ways of doing it though? Like maybe surprising you after work and giving them to you himself, with a kiss?

I don't know, it would just feel like a complete intrusion of privacy for me.

Ickle Magoo

I'd hate it. It would feel like a deliberate attention seeking thing because he clearly knows my home address and has the opportunity to hand them over in person - so why make a song and public dance about it?

Mind you, I'm not a big fan of flowers anyway - they always seem a bit pointless to me.

Novella

chatterpillar wrote: »

Do you not think there's nicer ways of doing it though? Like maybe surprising you after work and giving them to you himself, with a kiss?

I don't know, it would just feel like a complete intrusion of privacy for me.

I like flowers so getting them in any way, shape or form would cheer me right up! It'd be nice to be surprised after work, sure but if I was sent flowers in work, I would think that my boyfriend was making an effort to be sweet and surprise me so for that reason, I wouldn't mind at all and no way would I be annoyed. Life is too short to fight over that kinda thing, imo.

Sound Bite

Dont get me wrong, I appreciate the gesture, I just dont get why he'd send them to work. (Specifically when I mentioned before not to).

I'm a bit slow tonight....marking his territory...as in so my male colleagues would know I was kinda seeing some one? Am I understanding you right?

Novella

I didn't see you'd said you'd asked him not to - sorry! If someone did something I'd specifically said would make me uncomfortable, of course I'd be annoyed. Now I don't understand why he did it!

Yeah, marking his territory - making it public that you're off the market kinda thing!

Agent Smith

Well i for one would be embarrassed...

Feeona

I'd think it a lovely gesture on his part, which would completely over-ride any embarrassment I might feel. I wouldn't think that he was 'marking his territory', but then again I know he's not the type to 'mark his territory'.

Princess Peach

I think at first I would be a little embarrassed, but then I would realise how great it would be to have a guy who actually did something this sweet and thoughtful! I think that feeling would over ride any embarrassment.

I've never gotten flowers

Scarinae

When I had been with my boyfriend a month he brought a white rose into college for me. It was completely unexpected, and I thought that it was really sweet, although I was a bit embarrassed carrying it around all day. Especially when I bumped into my ex and he was like "Ooh a rose, where did you get that?"

I'm not sure how I'd feel about him sending them to my workplace... We're in a long-distance relationship now so it's not like he can really give them to me in person, I don't think he'd send them to my work though cos I haven't been there that long, also it's not really the kind of thing he'd do. If he did though, I'd probably just see it as him thinking of me, and I'd be appreciative

30lady

Hate hate hate it
I'm not a bunch of flowers fan anyway, but delivered to work...yuck!!

I was saying to a boyfriend one time a few days before valentine's that I would die if I got flowers delivered to me at work...I think it's so unimaginative and show offy...and so on and so on. A couple of hours later he confessed he had ordered a bunch of flowers to be delivered to me at work on Valentine's day. :mad::mad::mad:
I ended up phoning the florists the next day and got them to stop the delivery and collected the flowers myself.

The same d***head boyfried got a bunch of flowers delivered to my workplace over a year later for my birthday :eek::eek::eek:

He is most definately an ex.

squeakyduck

I'd like it, just because I would be asked and I could be like "oh yeah my OH is sooo amazing" and go all gooey in work! But, I've never got flowers delivered to my work so I might not be like that. It's what I'd imagine myself to be!!!

On Valentines day 2006 (my first year of Uni) I was in an english lecuture. The lecturer was talking about how love was dead and some guy runs into the lecture hall and yells "is X here?" She waved and he ran up to her with a box of chocolates, roses and a teddy bear. Dirty looks? About 300 angry girls glaring up at her! She nearly died! - Just goes to show some people would love the public display of affection and others hate it!

panda100

Fishie wrote: »

When I had been with my boyfriend a month he brought a white rose into college for me. It was completely unexpected, and I thought that it was really sweet, although I was a bit embarrassed carrying it around all day. Especially when I bumped into my ex and he was like "Ooh a rose, where did you get that?"

I'm not sure how I'd feel about him sending them to my workplace... We're in a long-distance relationship now so it's not like he can really give them to me in person, I don't think he'd send them to my work though cos I haven't been there that long, also it's not really the kind of thing he'd do. If he did though, I'd probably just see it as him thinking of me, and I'd be appreciative

I always thought you were a bloke for some odd reason

I guess it depends on your work situation, but I think sending flowers is a lovely gesture.I'd have no problem If they were delivered at work or home tbh

Princess Peach

30lady wrote: »

Hate hate hate it
I'm not a bunch of flowers fan anyway, but delivered to work...yuck!!

I was saying to a boyfriend one time a few days before valentine's that I would die if I got flowers delivered to me at work...I think it's so unimaginative and show offy...and so on and so on. A couple of hours later he confessed he had ordered a bunch of flowers to be delivered to me at work on Valentine's day. :mad::mad::mad:
I ended up phoning the florists the next day and got them to stop the delivery and collected the flowers myself.

The same d***head boyfried got a bunch of flowers delivered to my workplace over a year later for my birthday :eek::eek::eek:

He is most definately an ex.

I really hope this wasn't the reason ye broke up

Toto Wolfcastle

I had roses sent to me in work last year. He knew I was having a bad couple of days and I only see him at the weekends so he couldn't hand them to me in person. It was lovely. However, they were delivered to the office (in a school) so none of my colleagues saw me receiving them. If they had been handed to me in front of everyone I would have been embarrassed. I was still mocked a lot when my colleagues found out but I really appreciated the fact that he took the time to send them to me.

omb0wyn5ehpij9

Women wonder why they find it hard to find a nice guy, but maybe a guy sends flowers because he wants to? And to give his girlfriend a surprise? And maybe he is just a nice guy? And not trying to "mark his territory" as it was so nicely put :rolleyes:

panda100

An interesting question would be has any of the ladies ever sent flowers to their partners work?

Lat year, I sent flowers to my (ex) Boyfirends house as he was a freelance journalist and had a few tight deadlines which was making him completely stressed. He was really shocked to get the flowers but said it really brightened up his day. When I went over to his house he had them stuck in a pint glass,it was the closest thing he had to a vase!I guess guys aren't used to getting flowers

Ickle Magoo

Bryn wrote: »

Women wonder why they find it hard to find a nice guy, but maybe a guy sends flowers because he wants to? And to give his girlfriend a surprise? And maybe he is just a nice guy? And not trying to "mark his territory" as it was so nicely put :rolleyes:

I have a nice guy - so nice that when I say getting flowers, especially to my work, isn't my bag that he respects that.

On the other-hand, the OP's fella is so nice he sent flowers to her work even though she'd expressly asked him not to. Yeah, lovely and thoughtful, that.

squeakyduck

panda100 wrote: »

I always thought you were a bloke for some odd reason

I guess it depends on your work situation, but I think sending flowers is a lovely gesture.I'd have no problem If they were delivered at work or home tbh

Thanks I guess! :P I was 100% girl the last time I checked! :rolleyes:

rainbow kirby

I would hate it. My work life and my personal life are separate and I wouldn't really feel comfortable with a big, obvious gift from a partner being delivered to my workplace.

Toto Wolfcastle

I sent my boyfriend a box of stuff (I can't remember what was in it tbh) to work after he sent me flowers. He wouldn't have wanted flowers, so I figured a box of stuff he liked would be the next best time. He thought it was sweet. It was a once off though just like my flowers were a once off.

Princess Peach

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

I have a nice guy - so nice that when I say getting flowers, especially to my work, isn't my bag that he respects that.

On the other-hand, the OP's fella is so nice he sent flowers to her work even though she'd expressly asked him not to. Yeah, lovely and thoughtful, that.

Its cause men don't have brains. He maybe thought it was a reverse psychology kinda thing. I say bless his heart.

Maybe I'm just in a soppy mood

princess-lala

Ive gotten flowers in work 5 times.

The first was for my 21st from my parents

The second was for Valentines day from a "guess who" - turned out to be a guy I had kissed once.

The third were from my best friend for passing my driving test.

The fourth were 5 different bunches the day I opened the salon - looked more like a florists than a salon :rolleyes:

The last was a few months ago from a guy I had broken up with the day before! He just couldn't get the hint!! :mad:

I love flowers anyway, doesn't make me think anything about them only puts a great big ole smile on my face

omb0wyn5ehpij9

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

On the other-hand, the OP's fella is so nice he sent flowers to her work even though she'd expressly asked him not to. Yeah, lovely and thoughtful, that.

If she asked him not to, well then he shouldn't have.

But my point is that guys can just send flowers to be nice, there is no hidden meaning behind it.

Ickle Magoo

Bryn wrote: »

If she asked him not to, well then he shouldn't have.

But my point is that guys can just send flowers to be nice, there is no hidden meaning behind it.

I totally agree, I thanked the "marking territory" post based solely on the fact he'd done it even after she asked him not to - which would infer to me she perhaps wasn't the primary motivation... :cool:

Otherwise, flowers as a gift to anyone, anywhere is a nice thing to do - I acknowledge that and I don't own a vase.

Scarinae

panda100 wrote: »

I always thought you were a bloke for some odd reason

I guess it depends on your work situation, but I think sending flowers is a lovely gesture.I'd have no problem If they were delivered at work or home tbh

Is it me that you thought was a guy? I get that a lot, sometimes I get bizarre answers to my posts that indicate everyone thinks I'm male! It must be the Darkwing Duck avatar

This thread is making me want flowers!

Xiney

Princess Peach wrote: »

Its cause men don't have brains.

Just because we don't allow sexist comments towards ladies here does not mean we allow sexist comments towards men.

Princess Peach

I'm just gonna send some to myself in work next week, with a card saying from a special someone.....

Wibbs

Princess Peach wrote: »

Its cause men don't have brains.

Eh hello? Man here with small brain may take issue with that...

Lia_lia

I would be embarrassed. Work would just take the piss outta me for ages...I work with chefs! Also don't think I'd ever go out with a guy who is that cheesy.

Sound Bite

Bryn wrote: »

Women wonder why they find it hard to find a nice guy, but maybe a guy sends flowers because he wants to? And to give his girlfriend a surprise? And maybe he is just a nice guy? And not trying to "mark his territory" as it was so nicely put :rolleyes:

Bryn wrote: »

If she asked him not to, well then he shouldn't have.

But my point is that guys can just send flowers to be nice, there is no hidden meaning behind it.

My issue is not with getting flowers. My issue is I dont like getting them at work & also I specific told him before. I understand a guy dont need to have an agenda to sent flowers & I do appreciate surprises, just I dont appreciate them at work.

I've sent flowers to his work a few times
he was very blushy but liked it I think!
I would hate to receive them though haha, I'm not really into getting flowers though, prefer giving them.

shinikins

While i love flowers, i have mixed sentiments regarding them being sent to me in work.
I've gotten flowers in work twice, the first time, for valentines day(which also happens to be my birthday) my then boyfriend sent a HUGE bunch of roses and balloons to me in work. Beautiful, but my god was i embarrased walking through the store, and i was slagged all day. Was very impressed and proud though, until i spent nearly two hours wainting in Jervis Park(on my BIRTHDAY!!!) for him to come pick me up. His reason for being late-he went for a "quick drink" with the lads. So that took all the good out of it for me.

The second time i came back from a weeks holidays and found a gorgeous vase of flowers waiting for me at reception, sent to me by a guy i had met only a few nights previous. Ended up seeing him for a few weeks, but he was such an ass that i can't help but not enjoy the memory of the surprise of getting the flowers in the first place.

TBH its kind of embarrassing to receive flowers in work, i'd much rather them sent to my home, or hand delivered by himself. It means that much more than a huge public display.

Nervous Wreck

Lia_lia wrote: »

I would be embarrassed. Work would just take the piss outta me for ages...I work with chefs! Also don't think I'd ever go out with a guy who is that cheesy.

The nail and hammer finally meet.

I'm generally a fan of romantic gestures that are a little more personal than a bunch of flowers. I did the flowers thing (as in, in person, not to someone's job) twice in the past (once with each of two different girls) and I felt extremely awkward doing so. I just felt it was such a cliché; just wasn't me. One of the exes also said it felt awkward cos she was used to me being a good bit more original so I guess we agreed on that which was nice.

As for the flowers getting sent to work thing, cliché as it is, I can see how it could be very sweet. Though for it to actually be sweet and not awkward, the person on the receiving end would have to be of that same opinion. Otherwise it's a total fail. But jesus, sending flowers to someone's job after having been specifically told not to is relationship/social suicide. Wouldn't take it as territory marking though; at least give the guy the botd on that one.

Lia_lia

Nervous Wreck wrote: »

The nail and hammer finally meet.

Oh snap!

Posy

I work in retail so would be mortified if I got flowers in work. I'm not a big fan of flowers (but would appreciate the gesture nonetheless!) but if I said to a guy 'flowers being delivered to me in work would be an embarrassing nightmare' and then he sent me some I'd be very annoyed.
It would be the same as me saying 'Yuck, I hate mint' 'No, I'm not a fan of mints' 'Ew, the taste of mint is horrible' and then he gets me a box of after-eights for my birthday, for example. I would not say 'Ah, it's the thought that counts.' I would be annoyed that he obviously didn't listen to me/care about what I wanted.

Fishie wrote: »

Is it me that you thought was a guy? I get that a lot, sometimes I get bizarre answers to my posts that indicate everyone thinks I'm male! It must be the Darkwing Duck avatar

You should have 'I am a girl' after 'I am a fish' in your sig!

CathyMoran

Have sent stuff to my husband's work a few times for valentines day but they were tasteful, I love sending him baloons - we are together a long time though. He has never sent me flowers as if I was getting the bus home they would be hard to transport though he has given me my favourite flowers after a long hard day. In the OP's case she said that she did not want them so the boyfriend was wrong in this case.

Yes they can be marking teritory but for me I am happy to be known as my husband's wife and have always been proud to have him on my arm.

Bulmers

this thread just caught my eye on the home page as i have just this morning ordered flowers for my wife for our anniversary to be delivered to work!!..little suprised by some of the reactions i have to say..although thinking about it i do see where some are coming from.

i've never sent flowers to someone in work it so thought i would for my wife for a change ( going out 10 yrs, married 3 )..she loves flowers and i do buy her them regularly anyway, just thought for something a bit different, and i dont think she has ever gotten flowers delivered to her either so sort of a novelty i suppose..

will see how she takes it but better to try than not try at all!

abrr1000

I LOVE getting flowers makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
My boyfriend sent them to me once - i was a little embarrassed but I think its lovely...I'd rather he do it more often actually!

I love the cheese :P

Xiney

I think an important distinction has to be made between people who are married a while/in a very long term relationship and people who are dating.

If you're dating (and maybe not for a long time) it may be embarrassing because not everyone would know your love life situation etc and might think that it's too showy a display.

Whereas if you're married a while/VLTR, it might be looked at in a more positive way, for example, by the other ladies in the office, particularly if you've been married a long time. It's considered sweet, I think, for a husband or a more longterm boyfriend to continue to be romantic like that.

I know if, for example, an older lady was to receive flowers at the office on their 25th wedding anniversary I would find that absolutely adorable.

Malari

I told my boyfriend early on I wasn't that into flowers. I think we were just talking about Valentine's day or something. Since then he's convinced I hate flowers and think they are a waste of money, so don't think I'll ever get any from him Doesn't bother me.

I don't think I'd be too worried about getting flowers in work. The only time I did get sent any it was an apology from my then boyfriend for something I didn't know about yet. Hmmph! Maybe that soured it for me.

On the other hand, my dad gets dafodils for my mom every year on my birthday. She got them when I was born so it's special. I know if they were delivered to her work that it would only inspire "dafodils, how cheap!" type comments, so it's not worth it.

boarduser1980

it happened to me years ago, i was only starting to go out with the guy maybe 3 weeks or something, and i worked in a small office, flowers arrived and i was called out to reception and then had to walk back to my desk with them.
I was sooo embarrased, i would have preferred them to be delivered to my home not my work place.

animaal

No doesn't always mean no. Most of the time, all it takes is simple cop-on to know the difference. But sometimes, it's more subtle.

Way back when I was young, my mother once told me not to bother getting her anything for her birthday. I should save whatever money I had. I did just that. It's a mistake I never made again with her or anybody else.

With something like this, I think it's pretty safe to assume the guy just misjudged the situation, even if "I did tell him I rather he didnt".

Or maybe I'm just scarred for life

Gone West

Bulmers wrote: »

this thread just caught my eye on the home page as i have just this morning ordered flowers for my wife for our anniversary to be delivered to work!!

Yeah me too, I ordered flowers (her favorite type) today for herself. Delivered to work, nothing OTT though.
I know she will be a little embarrassed, which is partly why I had them sent because she will see the funny side to it :pac:
She works in an all-female office, no men, so its definetly not "marking my territory".
Its just a nice surprise even for the day thats in it (occasion).
I couldn´t get them delivered to her house as shes out all day and the delivery service only does office hours delivery.

I can see how people who work in retail would be embarrassed especially if they had previously mentioned they would not appreciate it.

Das Kitty

I thought I wouldn't like to get flowers at work but then I did and I was delighted. Still motto transporting them from reception out to the car at going home time though!