The Date

Jennifurball

Argh just typed loads and it crashed so I will put it in a nutshell!

The date was lovely and he is gorgeous! He seems to like me a lot and wants to see me again but as we don't live in the same town and we both don't have a car, that could become a bit of a pain but we have agreed to see how things go and he said he could stay over and get picked up for work so fingers crossed things work out. I really like him and am so worried he will decide he doesn't want to see me.

He said he really likes me but doesn't want to run before he can walk cos he doesn't want to get hurt so he is a bit wary but I hope I can prove to him that I really like him and am genuine. He is gorgeous and the best thing is, he doesn't see it. He was talking about kids again saying he wants to settle and start a family (not necessarily me I guess but he brought it up with me and asked if I wanted them). I don't think that is freaky, it is all part of sizing me up seeing if we both see the same future I suppose. That is the impression I get anyway.

He compliments me loads and was so so so affectionate with me, even the morning after (he stayed to get me home safe as we were in his town on the date, nothing happened though). He is a total gent and said good things come to those who wait.

I sometimes think he isn't that keen when I don't hear much from him, hope I am just being paranoid. We talk nearly every night for hours on facebook yet that isn't enough. Maybe I am just insecure from my last relationship.

Ex is begging me to come back now and telling me he has met someone but she isn't as good as me, that is charming for her eh? :pac:

Distorted

Jennifurball wrote: »

Maybe I am just insecure

Mmmn.

LegacyUser

of course you are back posting..why am i not surprised.

And of course you are mentioning the ex..

My opinion on your current situation is this, you have passed on the obession you had of your ex into the new guy, this happens when you don't deal with a break up and get some times on your own with yourself to then be ready for another relationship...you were clearly not into good shape after your break up, we all know that from the few of us who read your previous postings, and now you are diving into something and getting obessed with this new guy ever before you met him.

Again, I dont mean to be harsh here, but as previously suggested in previous threads you have posted, relax,chill and take time to yourself, enjoy things on your own that you stay with this guy or not or that he calls you or not so when he does then you are a full person instead of what appears to be a bit clingy and already depending on his contacts...

what will happens when he stops contacting you as much cos this is going way too fast?? how will you feel...I can already sees what will happens.

So one more times, let it be what is is and stop analyzing every movement and things he says.

John Mason

Jennifurball wrote: »

but I hope I can prove to him that I really like him and am genuine.

:eek::eek::eek:

OMG - you do not have to prove anything to him

I dont think you are ready to in a relationship yet

ash23

Jennifurball wrote: »

he stayed to get me home safe as we were in his town on the date, nothing happened though

Ah come on! Are you kidding me!
I'm not even going to comment on the other stuff but for gods sake, you can't be having randomers staying at your house. Internet dating is fine but having them stay at yours is plain careless.

You're lucky he was such a gentleman and you didn't get yourself into a serious bit of bother.

If you go on an internet date again, for the love of all that is holy, do NOT let them stay in yours or have you stay in theirs.

It's common sense.

Jennifurball

I know you are right, I have chanelled it into the new guy. Having said that, I don't love this new guy, yes it will be disappointing if it doesn't work out but its going to happen sometime and it will hurt a lot more down the line.

We have only had one date, I am realistic in that way. If I wasn't ready, I wouldn't have even entertained meeting anyone.

With regards to him coming back, my housemate was speaking to him on the phone for ages because he wanted her to pick me up but she couldn't so he said he couldn't leave me to make my own way home, I was a little tipsy and he wanted to make sure I was safe.

Cheap Thrills!

Pet, please be careful of any man that talks about kids on a first date!!! :eek:

It's not normal and very SCARY!!!! :eek:

I met a guy for a date before and he had 'finished' (read translation:been dumped) with his ex a year before.

On the first date he asked me all about what kind of maternity leave I was entitled to from my job. Needless to say I made my excuses and left quick smart!

A lad that is that desperate is just looking for a girl to procreate with, probably because he is 'in competition' with his ex or maybe other couples he knows.

No matter how QUALITY a new person you meet is, no-one in their right mind thinks about kids on first sight of meeting someone!!! If they do then there is something SERIOUSLY amiss there.

Please take it slowly and tread carefully. You don't want to be someone's incubator do you?

Life is about FUN at your age. Perhaps you want to 'show' your ex how desirable and brilliant you are by pandering to some really keen guy? Ok, that's a temptation, BUT you will end up Mother to some strangers kid just to do that? Come on!

It's NOT WORTH IT!!

Don't rebound. Please. If it's not right, don't bother!!!

He's creepy......talking about kids on a first date!!! Total FAIL !!!!

BraziliaNZ

ash23 wrote: »

Ah come on! Are you kidding me!
I'm not even going to comment on the other stuff but for gods sake, you can't be having randomers staying at your house. Internet dating is fine but having them stay at yours is plain careless.

You're lucky he was such a gentleman and you didn't get yourself into a serious bit of bother.

If you go on an internet date again, for the love of all that is holy, do NOT let them stay in yours or have you stay in theirs.

It's common sense.

Most of us have had one night stands. Just because they met on the internet doesn't really make it any dodgier than meeting him in a bar and staying over with him. Common sense usually gets you through these situations unscathed too!!

Miss Fluff

WHY are you continuously starting threads on your "love life" Jennifer when you totally disregard every single shred of sense that has been dispensed by well-intending Boardsies? Your posts above yet again prove things have not changed at all:

• You are still obsessed with your ex, and obviously still in contact
• You are clearly still hitting the bottle and making a fool of yourself if your date was phoning your housemate to come and pick you up because you had too much to drink - AGAIN
• You need professional help
• You are not ready to be with anyone

Why is being on your own for a while and taking stock such a scary prospect? You wouldn't believe how much it would empower you and boost your self esteem. You're going to go from one disastrous fiasco to the next the way things are shaping up. Rather than tripping over yourself to meet a man, any man, to repair the hurt you have been through, take some time out and work on your own mental health.

Nevyn

Jennifer PI and it's subforums are not to be used as an online blog or instead of speaking to a counsellor.
I suggest you try live journal or blogger as well as getting some professional help
t