Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Txt S*x....

  • 25-08-2010 12:20pm
    #1
    curios00
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4 ✭


    Is this cheating? and is it forgiveable?


Comments

  • #2
    Oryx
    Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    Is this a personal issue for you?


  • #3
    dublingal80
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,540 ✭✭✭dublingal80


    i would classify it as cheating in some sort of way. I dont know about being able to forgive the person or not. It depends on the type of relationship we had.


  • #4
    StarryMoon0
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 161 ✭✭StarryMoon0


    curios00 wrote: »
    Is this cheating? and is it forgiveable?

    Its not a physical cheating, but its cheating in both an emotional and respect way.

    As for forgiveable, depends on the people, reason, frequency doesn't it. Some would be able to get over it, others would find it very hard to.

    I myself would consider it cheating, and would likely be able to forgive if the proper talks were had, the right respect shown to me, and the commitment to the relationship was demonstrated to me by my OH.


  • #5
    curios00
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4 ✭curios00


    if it happened within a serious relationship for a couple of months? trying to forgive and forget but proving quite difficult...


  • #6
    StarryMoon0
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 161 ✭✭StarryMoon0


    curios00 wrote: »
    if it happened within a serious relationship for a couple of months? trying to forgive and forget but proving quite difficult...

    You can never forget, but if you both feel the realtionship is worth saving, in time it can be forgiven.
    Have you both talked seriously about it? How did that feel? Were your concerns brushed aside or ?


  • Advertisement
  • #7
    curios00
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4 ✭curios00


    StarryMoon0 wrote: »
    You can never forget, but if you both feel the realtionship is worth saving, in time it can be forgiven.
    Have you both talked seriously about it? How did that feel? Were your concerns brushed aside or ?




    endless hours of conversations about it. OH is so regretful and remorseful and has been trying ever since to reassure me and swears it will never happen again. get so pissed off though when i think about those few months of bare faced lies and secrets. also OH never confessed about it i found out and they initially tried to make it sound like it happened less than it did. cowardly behaviour just made it so much worse.


  • #8
    StarryMoon0
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 161 ✭✭StarryMoon0


    curios00 wrote: »
    endless hours of conversations about it. OH is so regretful and remorseful and has been trying ever since to reassure me and swears it will never happen again. get so pissed off though when i think about those few months of bare faced lies and secrets. also OH never confessed about it i found out and they initially tried to make it sound like it happened less than it did. cowardly behaviour just made it so much worse.

    Its ok, I understand how you feel. I had 5 years of feeling like that , still feel like that, but I am working through it. I feel my relationship is worth it, so I/we are working vey hard on fixing things.
    If you feel the same, it will get better with time, there comes a stage where you have to let it go. (assuming that it never happens again that is)
    Working towards building up the trust will eventually nudge out the anger, but it takes a while.


  • #9
    28064212
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,894 ✭✭✭✭28064212


    How do you know it was just text sex? It's unlikely that he was having regular text sex with someone with no other relationship at all. If I found sex-texts on a partner's phone, I would assume that there's a strong possibility that they were having an affair with that person

    Boardsie Enhancement Suite - a browser extension to make using Boards on desktop a better experience (includes full-width display, keyboard shortcuts, dark mode, and more). Now available through your browser's extension store.

    Firefox: https://addons.mozilla.org/addon/boardsie-enhancement-suite/

    Chrome/Edge/Opera: https://chromewebstore.google.com/detail/boardsie-enhancement-suit/bbgnmnfagihoohjkofdnofcfmkpdmmce



  • #10
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    28064212 wrote: »
    How do you know it was just text sex? It's unlikely that he was having regular text sex with someone with no other relationship at all. If I found sex-texts on a partner's phone, I would assume that there's a strong possibility that they were having an affair with that person


    I would agree with the above. How did it start? I mean you don't just pick up your phone and start talking filthy to someone and see if they do it back, there had to be something to start it all off. Like a physical affair or a kiss, something that made them realise they were attracted to each other and then it went on to text. OP for me it would be a dealbreaker, it really would, if he can justify text s*x to himself what else can he justify and if he's been lying to you for months how do you know he's not lying to your face now. For me defo dealbreaker but only you know if it's a dealbreaker for you.

    Hug, it's a horrible thing to go through OP.


Advertisement