Boner, The horn, stiffy

kfallon

Any guys ever get them for no reason??? Just did a stretch at me desk and pretty much ended up with a semi, had to think of the old bag sitting in the office at the end of the floor to get it back down (truth be told thinking of her nearly caused it to be an ingrown one :eek:).

Anyway, why do they 'pop' up for no reason whatsoever???

Kiera

You're lucky you dont get "wide ons"! Sick of clearing up the snail trail.

orourkeda

you should be more worried if you werent getting random horns on you

kfallon

Kiera wrote: »

You're lucky you dont get "wide ons"! Sick of clearing up the snail trail.

Nice darts trout, that actually made me laugh!

I wanted to go get a drink of water but had to wait til it died down!

orourkeda

Kiera wrote: »

You're lucky you dont get "wide ons"! Sick of clearing up the snail trail.

Fannies are excellent

Scrappychimow

Kiera wrote: »

You're lucky you dont get "wide ons"! Sick of clearing up the snail trail.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lg_18EgERsI

Kiera

orourkeda wrote: »

Fannies are excellent

Cocks are better!

kfallon

Kiera wrote: »

Cocks are better!

No, no, credit where credit is due, gees are the ultimate, followed by a nice set of bangers and finally a nice botty!

prinz

Any chance you could immerse yourself in a topic other than male genitalia? Just once.

Kiera

kfallon wrote: »

No, no, credit where credit is due, gees are the ultimate, followed by a nice set of bangers and finally a nice botty!

You and I seem to have this same conversation at least once a week

Gummy Panda

Kfallon is the new Jake?

bazmaiden

brb fapping under the desk

bonerm

kfallon wrote: »

Anyway, why do they 'pop' up for no reason whatsoever???

So ugly women can get some too.

cruiser178

kfallon wrote: »

Any guys ever get them for no reason??? Just did a stretch at me desk and pretty much ended up with a semi, had to think of the old bag sitting in the office at the end of the floor to get it back down (truth be told thinking of her nearly caused it to be an ingrown one :eek:).

Anyway, why do they 'pop' up for no reason whatsoever???

I lived in london for a few years and coming to and from work on the tube was a nightmare,the constant rocking motion of the train used the give me a raging hard on,i wouldn't even be thinking about sex.
Many a time i had to pass out my stop for fear of people laughing at me or thinking im some kind of perv.

Sykk

Kiera wrote: »

You're lucky you dont get "wide ons"! Sick of clearing up the snail trail.

Oh my God..

bonerm

Sykk wrote: »

Oh my God..

I think it proves there is no god. :pac:

kfallon

Kiera wrote: »

You and I seem to have this same conversation at least once a week

At least it's a conversation worth having

Brendog

This is a scientific fact.

"The average male gets an erection 11 times a day. 4 while awake. 7 while asleep."










I'm definitly superhuman

bonerm

Brendog wrote: »

"The average male gets an erection 11 times a day. 4 while awake. 7 while asleep."

He sounds pretty average alright.

Killer Pigeon

Sausage:

Example #1: This thread is turning into a sausage party.

Example #2: When Janie asked Russell to fuck for a second time he said sorry baby my sausage is overcooked and dilapidated

kfallon

Brendog wrote: »

This is a scientific fact.

"The average male gets an erection 11 times a day. 4 while awake. 7 while asleep."










I'm definitly superhuman

I woke up this morning with a raging hard on but I don't like to crack one off before work tbh. You can't beat a good pisshorn and this morning I defo didn't beat it

Sykk

kfallon wrote: »

I woke up this morning with a raging hard on but I don't like to crack one off before work tbh. You can't beat a good pisshorn and this morning I defo didn't beat it

Yes that wood have been wrong, alright.

iPlop

kfallon wrote: »

I woke up this morning with a raging hard on but I don't like to crack one off before work tbh. You can't beat a good pisshorn and this morning I defo didn't beat it

Why is the morning horn always the hardest.I woke up this morning with a horn that could bate a donkey out of a sandpit! And had to piss in the shower cos I couldn't bend it towards the jax!:eek:

darragh16

Septic Leper wrote: »

And had to piss in the shower cos I couldn't bend it towards the jax!:eek:

Which leads to the question, is taking a piss in the shower wrong/dirty?

The Agogo

Septic Leper wrote: »

Why is the morning horn always the hardest.I woke up this morning with a horn that could bate a donkey out of a sandpit! And had to piss in the shower cos I couldn't bend it towards the jax!:eek:

aw sick

bazmaiden

Septic Leper wrote: »

Why is the morning horn always the hardest.I woke up this morning with a horn that could bate a donkey out of a sandpit! And had to piss in the shower cos I couldn't bend it towards the jax!:eek:

style: you have it in buckets sir

kfallon

Septic Leper wrote: »

Why is the morning horn always the hardest.I woke up this morning with a horn that could bate a donkey out of a sandpit! And had to piss in the shower cos I couldn't bend it towards the jax!:eek:

We've all been that soldier, once I just lay across the toilet to ensure I got it all in the bowl! Thank God I don't live at home anymore, remember the days you were halfway to the bathroom with a pisshorn when you'd hear someone coming towards you....do you turn back and or leg it to the bathroom and hope you get there before someone notices it!!!

starlit

Luckily I've never seen a guy do one in broad daylight! :eek::P

kfallon

snuggles285 wrote: »

Luckily I've never seen a guy do one in broad daylight! :eek::P

Have you seen some at night

Kiera

snuggles285 wrote: »

Luckily I've never seen a guy do one in broad daylight! :eek::P

Do you live in a cave? Or have you never had a bf?

major bill

i used to get them at the wrong times when i was in my late teens. always seemed to happen when i was about to get off the bus going to work:pac: the early morning ones are the worst!!

starlit

kfallon wrote: »

Have you seen some at night

Might have!

Kiera wrote: »

Do you live in a cave? Or have you never had a bf?

No I don't but have lived a very innocent sheltered life...as a teenager...improved since then!

I have gone out with fellas and Yes I have had a boyfriend. :cool: Single since.

Kiera

snuggles285 wrote: »

Might have!



No I don't but have lived a very innocent sheltered life...as a teenager...improved since then!

I have gone out with fellas and Yes I have had a boyfriend. :cool: Single since.

You must be sheltered if you're only doing the durty at night :P

starlit

Kiera wrote: »

You must be sheltered if you're only doing the durty at night :P

Ha ha ha, I am a very private person like that, not mad on PDAs.

I'm a night owl not a morning person! :P

kfallon

Worst bit of todays 'wigwam in me kaks' was that I got it at 12.10pm and our 'wankbreak' usually finishes at 11.50am so was stuck between a rock and (literally) a 'hard' place

phill106

Kiera wrote: »

Sick of clearing up the snail trail.

I thought that is why women have legs?

Captain Average

I remember regularly getting an involuntary horn a few minutes before lunch time when I was in secondary school. The last few minutes before that bell were very anxious. Couldn't explain it, maybe I just really like ham and cheese sammiches

The Agogo

wtf?

Wolfe Tone

The ones ya got in school where the worst!!

kfallon

MUSSOLINI wrote: »

The ones ya got in school where the worst!!

I thought they were the best tho they were usually caused by the good looking Religion teacher bending over in front of you in a short(ish) skirt....couldn't wait to get home in the evening to play with me new toy

Kiera

kfallon wrote: »

I thought they were the best tho they were usually caused by the good looking Religion teacher bending over in front of you in a short(ish) skirt....couldn't wait to get home in the evening to play with me new toy

How are you not blind?

kfallon

Kiera wrote: »

How are you not blind?

I got two jam jars attached to me eyes

Seriously tho my eyesight is fine, don't know how! Hand to (japs) eye co-ordination is unreal too

major bill

kfallon wrote: »

I thought they were the best tho they were usually caused by the good looking Religion teacher bending over in front of you in a short(ish) skirt....couldn't wait to get home in the evening to play with me new toy

yea they were the best!! we had a french teacher and for a 60 year old this woman was stunning and was very top heavy she used to stand over your desk reading out of your book while your face was practically rubbing against her assets.she would then walk away the tease:pac:

sometimes i miss school:p

kfallon

major bill wrote: »

yea they were the best!! we had a french teacher and for a 60 year old this woman was stunning and was very top heavy she used to stand over your desk reading out of your book while your face was practically rubbing against her assets.she would then walk away the tease:pac:

sometimes i miss school:p

Those teachers knew what they were doing, it was like having 30 loaded guns in their classrooms, one could go off at any time if they made the wrong (right?) move

phill106

kfallon wrote: »

Those teachers knew what they were doing, it was like having 30 loaded guns in their classrooms, one could go off at any time if they made the wrong (right?) move

Jeez would be like the male version of carrie, babybatter flying around the room!

antodeco

I hope I never got one in my religion classes. Teacher was a middle aged man. He was also a tease...

PeterIanStaker

Whats the difference between light and hard?


you can sleep with a light on . . . .

kfallon

phill106 wrote: »

Jeez would be like the male version of carrie, babybatter flying around the room!

No fannybatter tho

dr.bollocko

And stay out!

Gummy Panda

dr.bollocko wrote: »

And stay out!

I blame Tar cream!! Its poisoning the nation!! :mad:

RolandIRL

Gummy Panda wrote: »

I blame Tar cream!! Its poisoning the nation!! :mad:

or saving the nation