What makes you hard?

epgc3fyqirnbsx

Well? What is it that makes you hard or are you a bit of a wimp?
yes this is a thread for double entendres and internet heroes

Me, well the simple fact that I extend the five second rule to the ten minute rule makes me hard

Also the fact that when I cut myself, which happens regularly in the rough and tumble of my existence, I don't ask for a plaster or bandage, I just get back to work and wait for the blood to clot

But mainly the fact that I now know that pain doesn't hurt. What is it but the body sending a little message to the brain saying "There's something up here hey!". All that need be done in that situation is for your brain to reply "I realise there are some issues at the moment, I shall deal with them in due course, relax the kacks" and pain is gone

zuroph

viagra.

gogo

Not what i thought this tread was going to be about at all..

galwayrush

Boobies.

**Timbuk2**

NSFW (bad language)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unkIVvjZc9Y

Cakes.

Too Late :P:P

Einhard

Chuck Norris asks his mammy to check under the bed to make sure I'm not there before he goes to bed.

chordtype

Shelby Glamorous Muscle wrote: »

Also the fact that when I cut myself, which happens regularly in the rough and tumble of my existence, I don't ask for a plaster or bandage, I just get back to work and wait for the blood to clot

Wow you're a hardcore Emo.

ejmaztec

Einhard wrote: »

Chuck Norris asks his mammy to check under the bed to make sure I'm not there before he goes to bed.

Are you a little potty?

djk1000

Shelby Glamorous Muscle wrote: »

Well? What is it that makes you hard or are you a bit of a wimp?
yes this is a thread for double entendres and internet heroes

Me, well the simple fact that I extend the five second rule to the ten minute rule makes me hard

Also the fact that when I cut myself, which happens regularly in the rough and tumble of my existence, I don't ask for a plaster or bandage, I just get back to work and wait for the blood to clot

But mainly the fact that I now know that pain doesn't hurt. What is it but the body sending a little message to the brain saying "There's something up here hey!". All that need be done in that situation is for your brain to reply "I realise there are some issues at the moment, I shall deal with them in due course, relax the kacks" and pain is gone

I hope you're not a chef...

ejmaztec

djk1000 wrote: »

I hope you're not a chef...

Rare is his speciality.

Celly Smunt

chordtype wrote: »

Wow you're a hardcore Emo.

Einhard wrote: »

Chuck Norris asks his mammy to check under the bed to make sure I'm not there before he goes to bed.

chuck norris? emo?

have i travelled back to 2007?

peanuthead

Einhard wrote: »

Chuck Norris asks his mammy to check under the bed to make sure I'm not there before he goes to bed.

ejmaztec wrote: »

Are you a little potty?

Chuck Norris has a potty under his bed?

OutlawPete

Like Biggins, I couldn't really say here on a public forum.

Just know that traveling across a desert in the boot of old merc, duct taped up,with just a few airholes to breath, for for five days straight, is not something that I am a stranger to.

Many governments have made the mistake of thinking that I would break under torture.

Makes me laugh when I think back.

deise go deo

Not what I tought this thread wes gona be about when I saw it,
But because what was in my head was better Im gona pretend it is.

Anyway Jesica Alba in Dark Angle.
Sex on legs!

NoHornJan

Tattoos, Piercings, Harley Davidson and a strong presense of body odour...

scientific1982

Shaved vaginas.

alwaysadub

Shelby Glamorous Muscle wrote: »

Well? What is it that makes you hard or are you a bit of a wimp?
yes this is a thread for double entendres and internet heroes

Me, well the simple fact that I extend the five second rule to the ten minute rule makes me hard

Also the fact that when I cut myself, which happens regularly in the rough and tumble of my existence, I don't ask for a plaster or bandage, I just get back to work and wait for the blood to clot

But mainly the fact that I now know that pain doesn't hurt. What is it but the body sending a little message to the brain saying "There's something up here hey!". All that need be done in that situation is for your brain to reply "I realise there are some issues at the moment, I shall deal with them in due course, relax the kacks" and pain is gone

Permission to knee you in the balls so?

DOC09UNAM

ejmaztec wrote: »

Rape is his speciality.

FYP

starbelgrade

When it rains, I never, ever use an umberella.

Sometimes, when re-heating food, I don't make sure that it's fully heated all the way through.

I have on several occasions, eaten bread that had mould on it.

I'm well 'ard, me. Hard as nails.

[Rasta]

anything with a pulse really, cause I aint into necro.

deise go deo

[Rasta] wrote: »

anything with a pulse really, cause I aint into necro.

Leave those sheep alone.

OutlawPete

deise go deo wrote: »

Anyway Jesica Alba in Dark Angle.
Sex on legs!

Very sexy spanking scene in The Killer Inside Me.

starbelgrade

OutlawPete wrote: »

Very sexy spanking scene in The Killer Inside Me.

*Runs off to download said film*

(Not joking either)

Einhard

ejmaztec wrote: »

Are you a little potty?

I'm a lil crazy alright...

Einhard

pmcmahon wrote: »

chuck norris? emo?

have i travelled back to 2007?

Chuck Norris is eternal. He exists outside time. And Chuck Norris will kill you and your family if you fail to capitalise his Name again.

Einhard

OutlawPete wrote: »

Like Biggins, I couldn't really say here on a public forum.

Just know that traveling across a desert in the boot of old merc, duct taped up,with just a few airholes to breath, for for five days straight, is not something that I am a stranger to.

Larry Murphy got you too?

Giselle

Shelby Glamorous Muscle wrote: »

Well? What is it that makes you hard or are you a bit of a wimp?
yes this is a thread for double entendres and internet heroes

Me, well the simple fact that I extend the five second rule to the ten minute rule makes me hard

Also the fact that when I cut myself, which happens regularly in the rough and tumble of my existence, I don't ask for a plaster or bandage, I just get back to work and wait for the blood to clot

But mainly the fact that I now know that pain doesn't hurt. What is it but the body sending a little message to the brain saying "There's something up here hey!". All that need be done in that situation is for your brain to reply "I realise there are some issues at the moment, I shall deal with them in due course, relax the kacks" and pain is gone

You're fully paid-up REAL man.:)

I'm not hard. I dislike any kind of discomfort.

I don't like being cold, I don't like being rained on, if I'm hurt I'll either whine or cry depending on severity. I don't wait for the blood to clot, I'll faint immediately.

I find Disney character plasters work better.

In winter, I warm up my socks before I wear them.

I am unashamed of any of this because I'm a softie girl.

A truly hard man can knock up some shelves and save a drowning kitten, after impregnating a convent's worth of nuns and striking matches off his chest hair and opening beer bottles with his teeth.

randylonghorn

alwaysadub wrote: »

Permission to knee you in the balls so?

They got cut off one day, he just got back to work and waited for the blood to clot.

Celly Smunt

this is truly hard

Einhard

deise go deo wrote: »

Anyway Jesica Alba in Dark Angle.
Sex on legs!

The way she bisected that straight line at 45 degrees was smoking alright. I'd square her hypotenuse that's for damn sure...mmmm

Handsome Bob

What makes me hard? I seem to part of an ever decreasing group of men who doesn't cry about being bald. :cool: :pac: Stop crying ya *****, LZ went bald at 16, now harden the **** up! :mad: :P

Einhard

pmcmahon wrote: »

this is truly hard

Finding a living human balder than Ross Kemp you mean?

epgc3fyqirnbsx

alwaysadub wrote: »

Permission to knee you in the balls so?

pffft, I'm so hard I'll spot that knee flip it up and land you on your back, knees on your shoulders and look down upon you with disdain thereby proving the hard mofo that I actually am

Giselle wrote: »

You're fully paid-up REAL man.:)

I'm not hard. I dislike any kind of discomfort.

I don't like being cold, I don't like being rained on, if I'm hurt I'll either whine or cry depending on severity. I don't wait for the blood to clot, I'll faint immediately.

I find Disney character plasters work better.

In winter, I warm up my socks before I wear them.

I am unashamed of any of this because I'm a softie girl.

A truly hard man can knock up some shelves and save a drowning kitten, after impregnating a convent's worth of nuns and striking matches off his chest hair and opening beer bottles with his teeth.

Why you sweet little thing, how I love to contemplate your lovliness when the sun is in your hair and your face is intent upon your embroidery whilst I hew a canoe from a felled tree

Not opening beer bottles with my teeth anymore though, went a year before I could get a cap from opening a bottle wherein both hot and cold foods would irritate the exposed nerve. But I was too hard to let anyone know about it...

Giselle

Shelby Glamorous Muscle wrote: »

Why you sweet little thing, how I love to contemplate your lovliness when the sun is in your hair and your face is intent upon your embroidery whilst I hew a canoe from a felled tree

You know me so well.:)

*giggles girlishly*
*Faints in admiration at your ...woodwork*

alwaysadub

Shelby Glamorous Muscle wrote: »

pffft, I'm so hard I'll spot that knee flip it up and land you on your back, knees on your shoulders and look down upon you with disdain thereby proving the hard mofo that I actually am

Sounds kinda kinky tbh :pac:

Mint Sauce

am really disapointed on opening this thread

Celly Smunt

irish-stew wrote: »

am really disapointed on opening this thread

i think you caught teh ghey

epgc3fyqirnbsx

Giselle wrote: »

You know me so well.:)

*giggles girlishly*
*Faints in admiration at your ...woodwork*

Admire me not Giselle for your breadmaking skills are second to none, after I build the wall in the fort field I shall take the freshly churned butter back to the cottage and enjoy it with said soda bread whilst we quietly contemplate the heather and the mountains.

Then I'll kill a cow, lads are coming over for the game tomorrow

Einhard

Shelby Glamorous Muscle wrote: »

Admire me not Giselle for your breadmaking skills are second to none, after I build the wall in the fort field I shall take the freshly churned butter back to the cottage and enjoy it with said soda bread whilst we quietly contemplate the heather and the mountains.

Will you be bringing the horse to France though?

steddyeddy

That i endured a extemly rough situation growing up left to start life on my own , built a lot of character and came through smiling

starbelgrade

I am salt.

opinion guy

Hmmm - basically the constant gnawing pain I have every day for at least the last 7 years.

RMD

Some very poor examples in this thread, Ross Kemp is a bit of puff on the whole hard scale tbh. :cool:

we'llallhavetea_old

yeah, yeah, whatever bitches, i got stung by a wasp the other day, no tears :cool:

kumate_champ07

OutlawPete wrote: »

Like Biggins, I couldn't really say here on a public forum.

Just know that traveling across a desert in the boot of old merc, duct taped up,with just a few airholes to breath, for for five days straight, is not something that I am a stranger to.

Many governments have made the mistake of thinking that I would break under torture.

Makes me laugh when I think back.

so you're into the old S&M then?

Einhard

we'llallhavetea wrote: »

yeah, yeah, whatever bitches, i got stung by a wasp the other day, no tears :cool:

I was bitten by a dog the other day so I bit him back to teach him a lesson. :cool:

questionmark?

48 posts in and no "Your ma" jokes






**** it












YOUR MA

Gummy Panda

I am actually Techno Viking

OBEY!

DOC09UNAM

questionmark? wrote: »

48 posts in and no "Your ma" jokes






**** it












YOUR MA

It's cause they're shít.

genericguy

Giselle wrote: »

A truly hard man can knock up some shelves and save a drowning kitten, after impregnating a convent's worth of nuns and striking matches off his chest hair and opening beer bottles with his teeth.

i knocked up some shelves yesterday, after pulling my cavalier spaniel from the jaws of local scumhorn's rottweiler, and in the evening i opened two beer bottles with my teeth (for my friend cos i don't like alcohol very much)

PM me.