I get the feeling my wife doesn't love me.....

BrianJD

I mean she can be very good to me like every evening when i come home she has dinner ready and she irons me a fresh shirt every morning. Yesterday she had all the lawns cut, the dog walked and breakfast in bed this morning was delicious...it's just that, at night, just when i'm drifting off to sleep, she leans into my ear....and says "Die you bas tard die"

phasers

Lol

biko

You're probably right.

00112984

It's not just your wife, you're an unloveable bastard.

Minstrel27

I think you are right OP.

cson

Why does she feel the need to put a dramatic pause in the middle of bastard?

orourkeda

when was the last time she sucked you off

Tomebagel

God damn bas tards.

KeithM89_old

Shes not saying "Die you bas tard die", shes saying, "Did you baste our pie?"

m@cc@

BrianJD wrote: »

just when i'm drifting off to sleep, she leans into my ear....and says "Die you bas tard die"

That's just German.........

FearDark

You have lawns in your kitchen?

StereoLove

That's rough....

Sea Sharp

Maybe you could make a delicious meal out of the pet dog, feed it to her, then inform her and see where it goes from there.

Mr Benevolent

What does Pighead say about this?

BrianJD

cson wrote: »

Why does she feel the need to put a dramatic pause in the middle of bastard?

She's obviously just emphasising the world

FearDark

FearDark wrote: »

You have lawns in your kitchen?

It's probably why she doesn't love him..

00112984

Is her name Helga? If so she means "The you bas tard. The"

I told her to say it.

cson

Confab wrote: »

What does Pighead say about this?

It reminds Pighead of the time.......

mink_man

she's ridin some fella sidways in all probabilty.

Kasabian

It's terrible when you realise your wife doesn't love you.


Means someone is probably boning her.

Edit , feck off Minky :pac:

Terry

Bitch bought you an iPhone. Just be happy with that.

Ricardo G

Kasabian wrote: »

It's terrible when you realise your wife doesn't love you.


Means someone is probably boning her.

Edit , feck off Minky :pac:

More than likely the dogs !

FearDark

Confab wrote: »

What does Pighead say about this?

He would probarbly google "anagram solver" as usual and make a "funny" responce in the third person to the OP.

BrianJD

BrianJD wrote: »

..emphasising the world

Mind = Blown

m@cc@

Maybe she's picking her at her crabs.

Anna Molly

Ehm...
If you're being serious, what do you do for her??
IF she does all this amazing stuff for you, maybe she's PISZED you dont do anything for her?

billymitchell

http://writeandedit.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/800px-goodwifeguide.jpg

Time laminate this and put it on the fridge.

gawd your so selfish after all she does for you !! and all she wants is you to die sheesh men dont understand them !!

Doop

Kill her, before she kills you

speedboatchase

Maybe she speaks German?




*cough* Simpsons reference...

Cheeky_gal

BrianJD wrote: »

I mean she can be very good to me like every evening when i come home she has dinner ready and she irons me a fresh shirt every morning. Yesterday she had all the lawns cut, the dog walked and breakfast in bed this morning was delicious...it's just that, at night, just when i'm drifting off to sleep, she leans into my ear....and says "Die you bas tard die"

I just exploded in work reading that lmao

Lol

CreepingDeath

OP, if you love her, you will just have to break her spirit.

Start by watching the Dog Whisperer for effective training techniques.

Lyra Fangs

Hey if she does all that for you putting up with one profanity a night won't kill you.