Dating Game!!!!

LegacyUser

Ok so I'll keep this short and sweet....

Met a guy the weekend and we got on great, exchanged a few text Mon and Tues and made some loose plans to maybe meet up on Sunday, there was a bit of banter in the txts and we seemed to get along good, thing is I haven't heard from him since we said goodnight on Tues, is this the way things work or should I have heard from him by now??? I am new to this dating scene as I was in a LTR for 6yrs and haven't a clue whats what, should I txt him or wait for him to text me.....Ahhhh I'm so confused but don't wanna come across as a too keen....any opinions?

redhed35

sometimes its seems guys are working on a differant time zone,it maybe that he has thought,ok,we made plans for sunday i give her a shout on saturday.

while im not into playing games on any level i do think that you should not make yourself so available if this is the case,or perhaps just make time for a quick coffee,he cant expect you to put your weekend on hold on the off chance hes going to ring and follow up.

if you dont hear from him by this evening make your own plans for the weekend.

a good rule of thumb for dating is 'dont make anyone a priority in your life while you remain an option in theirs.

i would see this as not a priority date but an option date for him, at least.

if he was really into you,i would think he would make solid plans to meet up,i might be wronging the man,and im sure other posters will have a differant view,for me,id make my own plans,if he calls he calls,if he does not,no big deal,move on.

Kiera

What's to stop you from contacting him? Drop him a text or a call and ask him if he's still on for Sunday. I dont get why girls wait for guys to make all the moves and over analyse everything in-between.

redhed35

Kiera wrote: »

What's to stop you from contacting him? Drop him a text or a call and ask him if he's still on for Sunday. I dont get why girls wait for guys to make all the moves and over analyse everything in-between.

i do see what your saying,but sometimes its so hard to break years of conditioning!;)

LegacyUser

What's to stop you from contacting him? Drop him a text or a call and ask him if he's still on for Sunday. I dont get why girls wait for guys to make all the moves and over analyse everything in-between.


I suppose there's nothing to stop me texting him but I suppose its just the fear that I don't get a text back as it has happened before, I'll decide later on what to do, and I am one of those over-analitical people I do know that I am over thinking stuff but can't help it I'm always trying to guess what the other person is thinking haha

And as for holding up my plans, I am defo not doing that I already have plans for tonight and tomorrow night and don't believe in holding off making plans in the hope that a boy would contact me hence the reason why we said Sun because I had plans for Fri and Sat, I don't believe in all these "games" that seem to be played during the initial few times of contact its so head wrecking.......I'd rather just know what the craic is from the offset!!

AngryBadger

OP if you text him instead of waiting to see what happens then you're taking control of the situation, whether it develops into something, or he has no interest in you at least you'll know.

Sitting on your hands waiting for him to text is not going to change the outcome, and in case anyone starts bleating on about "the rule/24hrs/3 days/etc." there's been no contact since Tuesday, I think the OP can safely take this bull by the horns without being accused of any impropriety.

Cullen82

Haha Totally normal I did the same thing this week, only I texted her last night.

I'd prob drop him a text this afternoon. Don't wait until too late in case he's out.

jurgenscarl

Cullen82 wrote: »

Haha Totally normal I did the same thing this week, only I texted her last night.

I'd prob drop him a text this afternoon. Don't wait until too late in case he's out.

Big mistake.
It's up to him to contact you. If he doesn't he's not worth it.
He should be chasing you. Not the other way around.
He has options too of course and if did not contact you it probably means he was out with other girls.
Contacting him will scare him off.

Cullen82

jurgenscarl wrote: »

Big mistake.
It's up to him to contact you. If he doesn't he's not worth it.
He should be chasing you. Not the other way around.
He has options too of course and if did not contact you it probably means he was out with other girls.
Contacting him will scare him off.

Think you misread that post buddy!

I texted HER I'm already bloke last time I looked:p

jurgenscarl

Cullen82 wrote: »

Think you misread that post buddy!

I texted HER I'm already bloke last time I looked:p

Sorry I hit quote rather than post reply my apologies.

My message was directed at the OP

LegacyUser

See how confusing it is, one fella says send a text the other says don't!! Lads, do you prefer to do the chasing or would you prefer a girl to do a bit too or would that put ye off??

I think I have kinda made my mind up anyhoo and am not gonna text him, I have enough to be doing at the weekend so its not as if I'm gonna be sitting around pining.......

LegacyUser

I'm a guy, usually would say don't text as a guy starts subconsciously losing interest, but since you had already kinda provisionally organised something I think there shouldnt be a problem in findin out what the story is, especially if u wanna organise your weekend.

Guys though usually do like to do the chasing, even though I'd generally be pretty casual when it comes to texting...

Miss Fluff

NewDater wrote: »

I suppose there's nothing to stop me texting him but I suppose its just the fear that I don't get a text back as it has happened before

Wouldn't you rather know? I think it's better to be proactive about these things. Two options here:

A. If he doesn't text back then at least you know he is just a douchebag and it gives you the chance to go "Next!"

B. If he does like you and is interested, he will be only delighted to receive a text from you. It will make his day!

Just keep the text you send him breezy and with either of the two scenarios above, at least you know then!:)

Odaise Gaelach

NewDater, for what it's worth, I'm a lad and I like it when a girl texts me out of the blue. It lets me know that she's interested too, which in turn encourages me - and makes my day.

Kiera wrote: »

What's to stop you from contacting him? Drop him a text or a call and ask him if he's still on for Sunday. I dont get why girls wait for guys to make all the moves and over analyse everything in-between.

Kiera has some great advice. If nothing else, you know whether you're both still on for Sunday.

Cullen82

Leaving it till after the weekend is a little long if you ask me - Lose the momentum of your last meeting.

If I was the guy I'd like getting the text off ya - Don't see what you have to lose

Uriel.

Yep, don't see why you can't just text him.

There's so much crap that goes with dating and every person you meet is and handles things differently.

You can sit there and say "well I won't text her, till she texts me cos I dont know how interested she is blah blah but if she texts me I know she's interested so it's all good blah blah blah."

Mature up, if you want to keep talking to him and you want to go out at the weekend/meet up etc... then text or better, phone him. It might make his week and show that you are interested.

The bull**** of the guy must do the chasing annoys me too. If you are a girl and your interested in someone then make it happen. Don't wait around. Same goes for guys.

Uriel.

jurgenscarl wrote: »

Big mistake.
It's up to him to contact you. If he doesn't he's not worth it.
He should be chasing you. Not the other way around.
He has options too of course and if did not contact you it probably means he was out with other girls.
Contacting him will scare him off.

This is a warped viewpoint.

Because he hasn't text her, he;s out with other girls :rolleyes:

Contacting him will scare him off :rolleyes:

*facepalm*

If she's interested she should just contact him. Maybe he's shy or trying to gage her interest, or not seem like he's coming on too strong, or perhaps he's not a big texter.