music issue

shoes34

Not sure if this is the right place for this thread or really how to to title it.

I own the house and rent out a room to one guy, no major problems so far, OK he's a bit noisey when he walking up the stairs and putting dishes away and close cupboard doors but nothing major.

He does appear to drink an awful lot in his room, comes in from work with maybe a six pack of beer almost every day and pretty much goes throught the whole pack.

Last night I was out babysitting for a friend and came home about 1am and he had the music blaring in his room, at first I thought maybe I won't hear it in mine but unfortuately I did and I had to get up for work this morning. So at this stage I was in my pjs so sent him a text and said sorry to text but could you turn the music down and that didn't happen so had to get up and go knock on his door really loud and again no answer did this about 3 times and even waited for the song to finish and started knocking but no answer and the next song kicked in.

Now I am a light sleep and plus the fact it was now after 1.30 on a Sunday night so I went to the fuse box and knocked off the fuse for a moment and then on again and no more music.

I know I probably went about it the wrong way but otherwise I would have been awake for hours. Should I say something to him today like could you please not play your music so loud ??

Thanks for reading.

spockety

Yes.

Slydice

so eh... have you actually seen him since you knocked the power off?

seems a bit strange that he didn't answer when you knocked on the door.

aren't you worried about the guy?

Cathmandooo

Maybe check if he's ok.

You did do the right thing, but maybe he went out and forgot to turn the music off?

HardyEustace

I'd definitely have a word with him.

To be honest, I'd give him his notice and get someone else in. This is your home place, your place of refuge and you really don't want that kind of strange behaviour going on.

You also don't want to estrange your neighbours who will be there for a lot longer than your tenant.

shoes34

He was there as when I went out he wasn't at home and I also heard him this morning. Maybe with all the drink he was flat out asleep but I wouldn't have been able to sleep with the level that music was at.

I live in a detached house so the neighbours wouldn't have been able to hear the music as there is a bit of distance between my house and theirs (thankfully).

Unfortunately I need the rent and where I live its hard to get tenants just wondering would it be wrong of me to advertise the room even while he is in it and if some one does contact me about the room then ask him to vacate? I had a previously tenant but she moved out as she was getting married and she was the perfect person and I guess we just got on really well and had chats together. I guess that's what happens when you rent out a room.

Cathmandooo

HardyEustace wrote: »

I'd definitely have a word with him.

To be honest, I'd give him his notice and get someone else in. This is your home place, your place of refuge and you really don't want that kind of strange behaviour going on.

You also don't want to estrange your neighbours who will be there for a lot longer than your tenant.

What??? A little OTT no?

There's nothing wrong with the tenant, the OP has said one night he had music on loud and she had to trip the electricity to get it to turn off, he probably fell asleep listening to it. Hardly a reason to kick him out. Sounds like he keeps to himself.

I'd have a little word to him about the music but don't make too big a deal of it.

HardyEustace

Cathooo wrote: »

What??? A little OTT no?

There's nothing wrong with the tenant, the OP has said one night he had music on loud and she had to trip the electricity to get it to turn off, he probably fell asleep listening to it. Hardly a reason to kick him out. Sounds like he keeps to himself.

I'd have a little word to him about the music but don't make too big a deal of it.

@Cathooo I don't think so. Have you actually taken the time to read the OP's post? You seem to be missing any awful lot. I'd be very uncomfortable to share with someone who basically barricades themselves in their room with a shed load of beer every night.

Have you ever been in the situation yourself? I have but luckily there was more than one other person in the house but it was extremely uncomfortable. This is the OP's home house, she should be able to feel at ease and happy when she turns the key to walk in the door every evening.

I think there's more of an underlying issue that the OP just isn't happy.

@shoes34 I'd give them a months notice, put an ad up on daft and go from there. I don't think this will have a happy ending otherwise. The tenant is not suited to you. Life is way too short to put up with this.

HardyEustace

shoes34 wrote: »

Unfortunately I need the rent and where I live its hard to get tenants just wondering would it be wrong of me to advertise the room even while he is in it and if some one does contact me about the room then ask him to vacate?

You can't do this, it's rather unethical and not fair on the tenant no matter how much of a pain they are. Just give them a months notice and start advertising on daft. Discuss you showing the room to other people. I've never heard of anyone have a problem with this but if the room is a sea of empty beer bottles then you will have a problem.

It's up to you, it's basically taking a risk on having the room empty for a while vs. putting up with a tenant who drinks their head off every night and who makes you feel uncomfortable in your own home.

Cathmandooo

Yes I have read the OP

no major problems so far, OK he's a bit noisey when he walking up the stairs and putting dishes away and close cupboard doors but nothing major

Being a bit noisey while tidying isn't something to complain about, in fact it should be encouraged.

Drinking in his room while not disturbing anyone is none of the landlord's business tbh. If he was doing it in the sitting room and getting wasted that would be something to be concerned about.

Having any stranger rent a room in your house is always uncomfortable, but if you need the rent then there's absolutely nothing wrong with this particular tenant.

shoes34

HardyEustace wrote: »

@Cathooo I don't think so. Have you actually taken the time to read the OP's post? You seem to be missing any awful lot. I'd be very uncomfortable to share with someone who basically barricades themselves in their room with a shed load of beer every night.

Have you ever been in the situation yourself? I have but luckily there was more than one other person in the house but it was extremely uncomfortable. This is the OP's home house, she should be able to feel at ease and happy when she turns the key to walk in the door every evening.

I think there's more of an underlying issue that the OP just isn't happy.

@shoes34 I'd give them a months notice, put an ad up on daft and go from there. I don't think this will have a happy ending otherwise. The tenant is not suited to you. Life is way too short to put up with this.

I have a second room in my house that I have daft to rent and maybe if I could get this rented I could then give him notice to leave. I do find it strange that he drinks a load every night as I'm not really one for drinking during the week and even not that much at weekends if I am staying in.

He has a TV in his room and he goes up there after he has his dinner at night, I think he may play footie 2 evenings a week but the weekend just gone I was out for the day on Saturday and when I came home at 7.30 he was just cleaning up from his dinner and then he went to his room drinking and I guess watching TV surely that's not good for a person, he's only about 27.

I have lived with guys before so its not a problem but there is just something odd about his behaviour, I mean he's never done anything except the fact that he can be really noisey and he does pay his rent on time. I am just going to say to him tonight if he could possibly keep the music down in future and lets hope it doesn't happen again, I still can understand how he could sleep with it but then again if I drank enough beers I guess I'd been in asleep too.

shoes34

Cathooo wrote: »

Yes I have read the OP



Being a bit noisey while tidying isn't something to complain about, in fact it should be encouraged.

Drinking in his room while not disturbing anyone is none of the landlord's business tbh. If he was doing it in the sitting room and getting wasted that would be something to be concerned about.

Having any stranger rent a room in your house is always uncomfortable, but if you need the rent then there's absolutely nothing wrong with this particular tenant.

I don't make it my business that he drinks in his room I just find it strange but that's his business not mine but surely its not healthy either to have beers every night.

Cathmandooo

shoes34 wrote: »

I don't make it my business that he drinks in his room I just find it strange but that's his business not mine but surely its not healthy either to have beers every night.

That's good Well he's an adult so it's his own decision whether to be healthy or not.

HardyEustace

HardyEustace wrote: »

Have you ever been in the situation yourself? I have but luckily there was more than one other person in the house but it was extremely uncomfortable. This is the OP's home house, she should be able to feel at ease and happy when she turns the key to walk in the door every evening.

Cathooo wrote: »

Being a bit noisey while tidying isn't something to complain about, in fact it should be encouraged.

Drinking in his room while not disturbing anyone is none of the landlord's business tbh. If he was doing it in the sitting room and getting wasted that would be something to be concerned about.

Having any stranger rent a room in your house is always uncomfortable, but if you need the rent then there's absolutely nothing wrong with this particular tenant.

To be honest, you never answered my original question which was - have you ever been in this situation yourself?

I based my answer on the drinking in the room scenario, not on the other smaller issues.

While there will be initial awkwardness, this will dissipate over time as house mates get to know each other. I don't think it should still be vastly uncomfortable several months in. I just think that there are houses that suit certain people and that sometimes, if the OP could, it does work out better in the long run to wait for a tenant that will suit the house.

Cathmandooo

HardyEustace wrote: »

To be honest, you never answered my original question which was - have you ever been in this situation yourself?

I based my answer on the drinking in the room scenario, not on the other smaller issues.

While there will be initial awkwardness, this will dissipate over time as house mates get to know each other. I don't think it should still be vastly uncomfortable several months in. I just think that there are houses that suit certain people and that sometimes, if the OP could, it does work out better in the long run to wait for a tenant that will suit the house.

We're not talking about me here. I don't see what difference it makes.

Him keeping to himself shouldn't be an issue. If he was coming out of his room drunk, disorderly and abusive then there's a problem. I assume the landlord interviewed him before allowing him move in, maybe seeing him as a quiet person who has money to pay rent was appealing at the time and a personality match wasn't considered.

Not everyone is suited to having a lodger in their home, needing rent from a lodger and holding off waiting for a perfect lodger is shooting yourself in the foot.

HardyEustace

That's fair enough. I guess we'll have to agree to disagree.

If he was coming out of his room drunk, disorderly and abusive then there's a problem.

See, this is where I have a problem as I would worry that this was going to happen. However, this may not be a concern to people, they may be more at ease with the situation. I just know that I would not be.

However, if the OP can afford it then I do think that it's worth waiting a week or two to see if a tenant suited to the house can be found. I know that no-one is ideal but I do think that people are more suited towards certain houses.

And while I know it's a recession and people have to tighten their belts and toughen up, I do think that it's important that people don't lose sight of the fact of how much stress it can cause for both parties involved when landlord and tenant aren't well matched.

I do get rather cross when being lectured about house sharing by people who have either never shared themselves or haven't shared in the last five or six years. (Not a dig at anyone posting here, just a generic comment).

shoes34

Cathooo wrote: »

We're not talking about me here. I don't see what difference it makes.

Him keeping to himself shouldn't be an issue. If he was coming out of his room drunk, disorderly and abusive then there's a problem. I assume the landlord interviewed him before allowing him move in, maybe seeing him as a quiet person who has money to pay rent was appealing at the time and a personality match wasn't considered.

Not everyone is suited to having a lodger in their home, needing rent from a lodger and holding off waiting for a perfect lodger is shooting yourself in the foot.

I did interview him and he did seem like a quiet person and in a way I guess he is, he did ask me after about 3 weeks if he could have a party in my house and I said no as its my home and he was fine with that. My friends did think it was cheeky of him to ask but I guess if you don't ask you don't know!

Unfortunately with the current economy I do need to rent out the room but if I win the lotto that will all change!!

wench

shoes34 wrote: »

he did ask me after about 3 weeks if he could have a party in my house and I said no as its my home and he was fine with that. My friends did think it was cheeky of him to ask but I guess if you don't ask you don't know!

It's his home too, so its not that cheeky.
At least he asked before arriving back with a bunch of friends.

shoes34

wench wrote: »

It's his home too, so its not that cheeky.
At least he asked before arriving back with a bunch of friends.

That is true and I do understand that if you rent a room in a house that means its also their home. At least he wasn't put out when I said no, but that also means he should be considerate of others in the house i.e. having the music so loud at 1am, hopefully its a one off.

HardyEustace

wench wrote: »

It's his home too, so its not that cheeky.
At least he asked before arriving back with a bunch of friends.

That's very true.

I think it does show that it's important to have a list of do's and don't for the house before someone moves in. It avoids confusion and mistrust later and kind of sets a suitable agenda and picture for the potential tenant to understand what kind of house it is.

I always try and go over
1. bills
2. cleaning
3. kitty
4. boyfriend/girlfriends staying over
5. friends staying over
6. parties
7. weekend vs mid-week behaviour

shoes34

I hadn't looked at my phone since coming to work until lunchtime and I really did think i would have a text apologising for the music last night as i had texted him to ask him to turn it down. But there was none. I know some will say he might say something this evening and other will say he might have lost his phone.

Hopefully I'll be there when he gets in and just ask him politely to keep the music down in future.

shoes34

Heading home from work now so going to say something about the level of music and if he could keep it down in future, as its a Sunday night and I need to get up for work in the morning.

HardyEustace

shoes34 wrote: »

Heading home from work now so going to say something about the level of music and if he could keep it down in future, as its a Sunday night and I need to get up for work in the morning.

Just say it's too loud and leave it at that. I wouldn't mention anything about it being a Sunday night. Otherwise he could get the impression that it's acceptable at weekends.

gossipgal08

Shoes Just wondering how long the guy has been renting from u?
I have shared with guys and found them noisy on the stairs closing doors ect. I would start by saying to him and take it from there

shoes34

HardyEustace wrote: »

Just say it's too loud and leave it at that. I wouldn't mention anything about it being a Sunday night. Otherwise he could get the impression that it's acceptable at weekends.

gossipgal08 wrote: »

Shoes Just wondering how long the guy has been renting from u?
I have shared with guys and found them noisy on the stairs closing doors ect. I would start by saying to him and take it from there

I didn't have to say anything to him, he apologised for having the music up loud and then asked me if I was sure it was loud, told him it was quite loud and he said it wouldn't happen again. I said I had knocked a few times and if it wasn't that loud as he thinks surely he would have heard me knock (I didn't say that to him).

He has been renting the room since the middle of May, so just about 2 months. I have rented the room out previously to a girl and I have lived with other people before but in rented accomdation whereas this is my home so maybe to some I might be a bit OTT about it.

As a previous posted said its home too once he rents out the room but then he should be considerate of people, maybe when he lived at home his parents tolerated it.

Bob Z

shoes34 wrote: »

I don't make it my business that he drinks in his room I just find it strange but that's his business not mine but surely its not healthy either to have beers every night.

So are you worried about him or feel uncomfortable? If you are worried about him you could mention to him


He drinks in his room but i get the feeling you wouldnt want him drinking in the sitting room

shoes34

Bob Z wrote: »

So are you worried about him or feel uncomfortable? If you are worried about him you could mention to him


He drinks in his room but i get the feeling you wouldnt want him drinking in the sitting room

To be honest I'm not sure if its any of my business, he rents a room in my house, we are not friends. I guess if I thought he was getting in his car after drinking I'd say something.

I think I'd feel uncomfortable if he drank loads in the sitting room every night, maybe its because during the week I wouldn't be one for having a drink and even if staying in at the weekend I might have a glass of wine if friends are over but otherwise tend not too.

But I have never said anything or done anything to stop him having the use of the sitting room he just seems to go up to his room and watch DVDs on his TV, actually most evenings I get in from work at 5.30 and usually go out walking/gym at 7 and not home until about 9 but he still goes up to his room.

Cathmandooo

Glad it worked out well and that he apologised sounds like a decent guy.

shoes34

shoes34 wrote: »

Not sure if this is the right place for this thread or really how to to title it.

I own the house and rent out a room to one guy, no major problems so far, OK he's a bit noisey when he walking up the stairs and putting dishes away and close cupboard doors but nothing major.

He does appear to drink an awful lot in his room, comes in from work with maybe a six pack of beer almost every day and pretty much goes throught the whole pack.

Last night I was out babysitting for a friend and came home about 1am and he had the music blaring in his room, at first I thought maybe I won't hear it in mine but unfortuately I did and I had to get up for work this morning. So at this stage I was in my pjs so sent him a text and said sorry to text but could you turn the music down and that didn't happen so had to get up and go knock on his door really loud and again no answer did this about 3 times and even waited for the song to finish and started knocking but no answer and the next song kicked in.

Now I am a light sleep and plus the fact it was now after 1.30 on a Sunday night so I went to the fuse box and knocked off the fuse for a moment and then on again and no more music.

I know I probably went about it the wrong way but otherwise I would have been awake for hours. Should I say something to him today like could you please not play your music so loud ??

Thanks for reading.

I wrote this post about 6 weeks ago and last night I had issue with the music again, now it wasn't as loud but still on a Sunday night when I have to get up for work the next morning it was an issue. I did have the TV on in my own room but down quiet low (7) and I could hear the music and when I turned the TV off to go to sleep it was still on as I was in bed in my nightie I didn't fancy getting out and going to his room again so I just sent a text message and it went off or down I'm not sure as long as I couldn't hear it.

He also leaves for work at 6am and is extremely noisey, thumps down the stairs bangs the doors and on a Saturday he gets back around 10 or so, now I like a lie in on a Saturday and obviously I have no issue with him eating or cooking as I rent out the house to him but I do have a problem with the fact that he doesn't close doors and I can hear the noise up in my room, I know I have to say something to him about keeping the noise down but I have never had this problem before and I guess I just don't know how to approach it.

I am going on holidays at the end of the month for two weeks and am afraid of what kinda state my house will be in when I get back as if i didn't hoover or wash the floors it would never be done. Now generally I don't mind cleaning but I do if I am away and have to do it when I get back.

I guess deep down I don't want him there but I do unfortunately need the rent money and I don't give off vibes to him that I don't want him as I don't see him that often.