A moment of crisis vs a moment of joy

somewhere

somewhere wrote:

it is not as important to a woman, how a man handles himself in a moment of crisis, as it is to how he handles himself in a moment of joy

The above is a quote from somewhere that I can't remember exactly and therefore approximated. I would love to know "the real quote" and who it's by.

Taken from somewhere and probably (presumably) taken out of context, this has turned my patriarchal world upside down. I have always been told to control situations for the betterment of others, and to the best of my abilities, I have.

But the problem is, it also makes sense.

For instance, I now realise I have stopped having fun. After coming across this quote, I have begun to re-evaluate fun and the importance of letting the small stuff slide. But it's a huge challenge.

I would love to know and discuss the philosophical meaning behind the above quote. I would love to give you my opinion on the above quote, but it confuses me and frustrates me equally, so you're help would be appreciated!

metrovelvet

Is this a translation?

Could joy be jouissance? Ya know what that means don't you?

metrovelvet

Is this a translation?

Could joy be jouissance? Ya know what that means don't you?

The Munky

I am certainly no philosopher but, one thing I have noticed over the last few years is that there is a 'comfort in sadness and there is none in joy'.

A few people close to me seem to have got themselves caught in a rut, down and out and pretty low self esteem. They tend to practice the mundane and preach the ordinary. However, if you ask them what they want from life the standard response is usually 'to be happy'. Yet all their well intended plans never seem materialise or develop. Why is this?

I think that the sadness they feel has become a security blanket in which to hide. If they stay miserable then at least they have a routine in their life. They have a handle on what each day brings and how to deal with it. It becomes something like an emotional 'Stockholm Syndrome' I guess. But, with happiness there is something scary about it.......

The second you are genuinely happy is the second you are vulnerable, pure and simple. If whatever has made you happy was to be suddenly taken away from you then your happiness was nothing more than a fleeting moment afforded to you by something or someone. That makes it much harder for you to control. So therefore its an emotion that frightens a lot of people.

Sadness is much easier to live with over a longer period of time albeit a tough, uninviting way to live. Happiness doesn't have the durability that sadness does. When you are happy you are on an emotional knife edge.

So to return to the OP's dilemma, I think the quote is referring to the vulnerability of men in general and how they tend to keep raw emotion suppressed. Men rarely cry and its still odd to see a man cry. Why? thats the question........ We can shout at the linesman when he gets an offside decision wrong, we can all cheer when we score the goal that puts us in lead in tight game in the Champions League final, but how many of us would cry if we won? How many of us cried when our child was born? How many of us cry at the movies?
Not many and not because we don't recognise the occasion or sense the palpable emotion but because men still view men who cry at joyous occasions slightly weaker than a man who remains stoic.
I personally think that the quote simply means that a man who can truly express joy is a man who is at peace with who he is.

These are just my thoughts.