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Does this guy like me?

  • 17-07-2010 1:57am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I met a guy on a night out through friends about 6 or 7 months ago. We got on great, chatted loads and ended up kissing halfway through the night. One of our mutual friends took me aside during the night and told me that this guy had broken up with his gf of three years the previous week, so basically not to get my hopes up. I didn't let it affect my enjoyment of the night or how we were getting on but had it at the back of my mind all the same.

    Anyway, I lost him towards the end of the night so no numbers were exchanged. A couple of days later, he found me on facebook and sent me a message. We messaged back and forth a bit, but it was all fairly casual so I wasn't too invested in it. I then met him by chance on the street a couple of months later and he asked me to lunch. We got on really great and exchanged numbers but unfortunately he was moving temporarily to England the following week for work, so again, I sort of mentally pushed the situation to one side.

    I haven't seen him in maybe two or three months, but in the last 6 weeks or so, he's been in contact a lot, texting every day, ringing four or five times a week and we chat for ages. It brightens up my day. This is all great, but to be honest, he seems pretty scared/intimidated by me! Like everytime he gives me a compliment, he apologises for it! i.e. "You looked really hot in that picture..sorry, I hope that doesn't offend you" and that kind of nonsense! If he says anything very flirty in a text, he'll send another one straight after to make sure he hasn't crossed a line with me. He's sent a couple of drunk texts saying I'm beautiful etc, but then rings mortified the next day!

    It's getting silly...and really confusing.. He's definitely straight and single. He's not my usual type at all; he's way more down to earth and a lot less flashy or glamorous, for want of a better way to describe a man! I like this about him though. My friends reckon he's nervous of saying the wrong thing as they consider me to be out of his league, looks wise. I think that's all ridiculous though as I genuinely really like him and fancy him more and more as time goes on. I initiate contact a lot too so he should know it's not one sided..

    He's moving back in a couple of weeks and he's already asked to see me. I presume it's a date, but the more I analyse his hesitation in being overly flirty with me, the more paranoid I'm getting! Is he just being gentlemanly?? Does it sound like he likes me? I've gone out with so many horrible guys (who'd be very forthcoming with sexual comments/texts) in the last few years, so maybe I've just forgotten how a nice man behaves?


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,673 ✭✭✭Miss Fluff


    He sounds like a really nice guy who is obviously in to you but just a little insecure/afraid of rejection.

    Keep the up the contact and make sure to initiate a conversation about your "date" in two weeks and how you are really looking forward to it etc.

    I think he is just proceeding with caution so no harm to show him the lights are green:)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22 lulu90


    I agree with Miss Fluff, it sounds like he is into you. Have you tried flirting back with him or even initiating the flirting to make it more clear to him that you are into him as well? Just be careful you and him don't end up in the friend zone with each other.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    OP he definitely likes you, theres no doubt about that. Hes just a little nervous/unsure around you! This is normal after someones been in a relationship a long time. You forget the ropes so to speak! :) Perhaps your pretty confident around him and this intimidates him? Im sure he will get more confident as time goes on.

    Just be careful you dont move too fast with him, you dont want to be a rebound. Your likely the first girl he kissed after he broke up with his GF so hes probably put you on a bit of pedestal. But since a few months have passed and you seem to get on really well i wouldnt worry about that. Just make sure hes completely over his ex before you start anything serious. For his sake as well as yours. Good luck with it, he sounds like a nice guy, try encouraging him a bit, flirt back etc.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 911 ✭✭✭Flying Abruptly


    Sounds like he is definitely into you.

    I'm the exact same when talking or texting a girl - I usually give a compliment or a playful insult but always say its a joke after so as not to offend (I wish I didnt but I get more confident talking to her as time goes by so it usually stops on its own).

    Make sure to give him the odd compliment too so he can see your interested, make your feelings clear and as others said inititate coversation about your next meet up. Personally theres nothing more confusing then not knowing where you stand about whether a girl your meeting likes you or not


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 184 ✭✭jurgenscarl


    This guy wants you.
    He's a real romantic softie.
    Go for it.
    Stop asking questions and just go for it.
    What have you got to lose?
    You inherited your instincts from evolution - every single one of your ancestors all the way back to the first primitive single cell organism 2 billion years ago all found a mate and reproduced.
    The accumulated experience of all those generations are written in your DNA.
    The voices of all those individuals who lived and died and survived global mass extinctions and meteor impacts and ice ages are telling you to go for it.
    So go for it.


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