everything is too much for me at this stage

LegacyUser

hello
im a young man 22 years old and am absolutly depressed off my tree. iv been this way for a few years now and i think im about to go insane now its gone so bad. basically i just am so distressed and anxious now that life dosnt mean anything to me any more.
i want to change my ways but i think its too much of a struggle. basically all my life iv been nervous and anxious in the company of others and avoid situations like the plague. when in the company of others i sweat go red and my hands start shakin. i cannot feel comfortable in my own self and feel really really down about this.
its like i just cant connect with people and make friendships and relax. my conversation skills are useless as iv been avoiding social interaction all my life and cant concentrate on things to even take in whats goin on around me. if someone does attempt to talk to me i cant think of anything to say of interest and just kinda nod my head and agree with what there saying. its like i have no personality what so ever. i wouldnt mind only iv been givin some unbelievable oppurtunitys in life to make friends and spark relationships with gorgous women. its like a plague that follows me and its gettin worse and worse. i actually hate myself for it. iv been to councillers and taken medication in the past but it never really helps its not going to change the way iv been all my life. i wish i could just transform myself radically its like im brain dead or something i just feel so useless. its affecting everything in my life when i was younger i played sport and never performed on the field due to lack of confidence. im anxious 24/7 i dont know what people must think of me hence the reason i dont have too many friends in life and am becoming a recluse.
God only knows whats going to happin next i drink to get a bit of confidence but the drink is turning me to depression even more as i do stupid thing on it. iv absolutly no social skills what so ever.
il finish up at that anyone out there that can help me?

Slutmonkey57b

Dealing with depression is all about doing work inside yourself, and it takes time and patience. You have to wait for results, and you won't know when they're coming. You'll never have a brain-switching moment of enlightenment where all your problems are fixed.

Don't dismiss medication - if you haven't got results before, go back to your GP and try something else, or try another GP. Medication is just a tool that keeps you stable while you try and deal with your problems. Bear in mind that when you're depressed, you don't have an accurate mental picture of who you are.

Nothing's easy, but you can start with the basics and work from there. Eat well, medicate, get some sleep, and do small things every day that increase your confidence in yourself. Keep up with what people talk about at work (tv, sport, whatever), so that you've got some knowledge of what's going on if they strike up a conversation about it. Small steps.

gagomes

OP, I feel for you. I could identify myself with some of what you said and especially early on in my life. Here's what: Don't despair or be anxious about it. It will change and improve as you grow older.

The problem with people who have social phobias and depression is that they tend to be very negative towards themselves and everything around them and therefore tend to focus only on the negative aspects and everything that goes wrong and will easily disregard and forget the things where they did exceptionally well. Practise to be positive. Challenge yourself in ways you usually don't, do some brain teasers (search em on google) to get your cortex engaged, read about critical thinking to help you overcome your innability to stand up to your opinions and ideas. Develop your own personal standards and live and die by them. Drinking may also not be very helpful, so put an effort to only drink one or two pints on a nightout. Talk to everyone, from the sober to the drunk, the old lady to the young one, chances are you will do well and that will help you overcome your fears somewhat and build the confidence. Also, whatever others think of you shouldn't matter to you. It's what you think that does. Just think that, everyone has their own insecurities and everyone feels self-conscious about themselves (some more than others, some less with the help of drinks or other emotional inhibitors) and if at present you hate yourself, you already identified a the problem, so now SEEK the solution! Also, depressed people tend to be be very inert and procastinate a lot because whatever is about to happen they start anticipating and thinking about what it takes to get from point A to point B instead of just getting from point A to point B. Stop thinking, act now!

Good luck, OP!